A new book about the psychology behind the secret has delved into the dark world of pedophilia.
The Psychology of Secrets: My Adventures with Murderers, Cults and Influencers, by British YouTuber and podcaster Andrew Gold, features a variety of different behaviors and activities that people have kept hidden, including murder, among others.
Andrew is best known for his YouTube channels. On the borderthat investigates sects and extreme beliefs, and hereticswhich features interviews with “guests…brave enough to go against conventional wisdom, social norms, religions and cults.”
Now he has interviewed an even wider range of people for his new book. In a chapter titled The Worst Secret in the World, the author describes his encounter with a couple of non-offending pedophiles, who spoke openly about their desires, their relationship, and how they repress their impulse to offend.
Known simply as Ruby and Sirius, the couple are self-described “child-attracted people” (MAP), which is a clinical term for those who are attracted to children but do not act on them. impulses of those who abuse them. .
Andrew Gold (pictured) is a British YouTuber and podcaster, known for his channels On The Edge and Heretics. He is also the author of a new book called The Psychology of Secrets.
Ruby, 25, who lives in a small town in northern Germany, says she is “horrified” by her desires, which have led her to a “sad and lonely existence.”
These desires include attraction to children between the ages of one and seven.
This is a rare case of a woman in a population made up mostly of men, like her partner Sirius, 27, whom she met on an online forum for non-offending pedophiles.
According to the book, citing sexologist Michael C. Seto, approximately one percent of men are pedophiles.
The disease is believed to be much less common among women. However, it is speculated that fewer young men report abuse by older women due to social stigma.
Speaking to the author, Ruby revealed that she first discovered “something was wrong” after becoming “turned on by Japanese anime depicting young boys”, which she used as a substitute for pornography.
Desperate for her predilections, she avoided society and sought only the online companionship of other online MAPs.
After meeting Sirius, the couple say they fell in love, even though they were not attracted to adults.
The Psychology of Secrets (pictured) by Andrew Gold is published by Macmillan and is now available in book form, for Kindles and as an audiobook.
They claim that talking to each other about their sexual desires saved them from suicide.
More graphically, the couple reveals that they have sex daily, taking turns role-playing as babies, which the book describes as a “nauseous” but “more acceptable alternative to the couple acting out their desires with real children.”
Additionally, they attend a therapy program at Berlin’s Charité hospital, the Don’t Offend clinic, which invites PCPs to attend sessions and speak, without being reported to the authorities.
While the initiative is controversial as it allows known MAPs to remain free, the clinic believes this is the only way to encourage them to attend therapy.
This, he says, can subsequently save children from abuse by helping potential offenders control their impulses before acting on them.
Additionally, the Don’t Offend clinic aims to eradicate the cognitive bias that results from pedophiles meeting in online forums and convincing each other that sex with children can be consensual.
Andrew interviewed Don’t Offend’s Maximilian von Heyden for the book and asked him how therapy works and whether attraction to children can be eradicated.
Mr von Heyden replied: ‘No (attendants will not lose the desire to have children), but some of the patients we see have high ethical standards.
‘They come to therapy to improve their lives and try to cope better. Be better socially integrated. But they would never abuse a child.
Analyzing the results of the clinic, Mr. von Heyden revealed that around four percent of the population is attracted to minors.
That translates to a significant proportion of every 25 people.
He explained that there is a “difference between exclusivity and non-exclusivity.”
“If you are exclusively a pedophile, you will probably have a hard time because you will never be able to fulfill your sexual fantasies without committing a crime or hurting someone,” he explained.
“But if you’re not exclusive, you’ll be satisfied having sex with a partner of normal age.” You may be turned on by a boy running around naked, but you’re not obsessed with it.’
He went on to say that while it is “a mistake to stigmatize” those born with an attraction to children, “clearly such abuse cannot be tolerated.”
Because he believes that research and clinical data support the idea that pedophilia is a fixed problem (it is not a universal belief: the director of the UK’s Stop It Now! program, Donald Findlater, considers it a curable disease), PCPs who attend the clinic are taught about what may increase their risk factor when it comes to abusing children (e.g., drinking, being around minors, and being stigmatized).
This is because being stigmatized and described as monsters can lead MAPs to online forums, where others justify child abuse, with some even describing it as a “victimless crime.”
“That is very dangerous, because it gives those who never intended to offend free license to do so without feeling bad about their identity,” Andrew writes in the book.
He also notes that no other secret he has learned “has been darker or heavier than Ruby and Sirius’.”
However, to the author’s surprise, upon researching the chapter, he discovered that there is a “pride involved in being a non-offensive pedophile.”
Revealing how he “avoided the p-word in their presence”, believing it would offend the couple, he instead found that they are “desperate to talk about it and spread their non-offensive stance in their community”, as they believe the open discussion would bother them. helps, and could help others, control their impulses.
Andrew writes: ‘Their secret has consumed their lives to such an extent that there is very little to talk about other than the pedophilia.
‘Now that they have the chance to tell their secret to a stranger, they don’t want to stop. For me, I’m a little fed up with this. The above hours are enough for a lifetime.
The Psychology of Secrets: My Adventures with Killers, Cults, and Influencers by Andrew Gold is available now.
