Sexual myths are (almost) as old as sex itself.
Some are relatively innocent old-fashioned misconceptions, but others are harmful stereotypes that affect how society perceives certain people.
How many of these did you believe (or still believe)?
MYTH: MASTURBATION WILL LEAVE YOU BLIND, MAKE YOU IMPOTENT AND DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH
Her great-grandmother was convinced that even a little DIY would make her children blind.
The generations that followed were no less paranoid: They worried that masturbation would lead to all sorts of health problems, from hair loss to impotence.
Blame the ancient Greeks and Romans for making athletes abstain from sex before an important event: They believed that ejaculating beforehand would weaken them.
The latest sexual conspiracy floating around is that masturbating drains your energy, strength, and concentration.
‘No Nut November’ challenges men to refrain from ejaculating for the entire month of November. Because? Purported health benefits include improved sperm quality, increased stamina, reduced stress, improved concentration and self-control, and reduced erectile dysfunction. Oh, and thicker hair!
Sexpert Tracey Cox (pictured) has spoken about how it can feel when your ex-partner becomes the person you hoped they would be, with a new partner.
the truth: Masturbation has never left anyone blind or impotent. There is also no research to support the claim that it dilutes sporting prowess.
Every health claim made for ‘No Nuts November’ is met with a ‘no real scientific evidence’ result when investigated.
Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller says there is no scientific evidence that giving up masturbation and ejaculation improves health. If anything, there are more potential health benefits to be gained from indulging in self-pleasure than from abstaining.
MYTH: MEN WHO VISIT SEX WORKERS ARE UGLY AND DIRTY OLD MAN
If you have to pay for sex, you must be undesirable, socially inept, extremely unattractive, or deviant. Good?
The stereotypical image of a sleazy man in a trench coat looking for a secret, debauched hookup has been around for centuries and refuses to go away.
The truth: I can tell you anecdotally that this is simply not true: I know many men who have paid for sex and none of them fit this description.
Studies also show that men who pay for sex come from all walks of life and age groups.
They range from young professionals on stag parties to married men in sexless relationships and all visit sex workers for a wide range of reasons.
Some feel lonely and camaraderie and connection are the motivation.
Others do it to explore sexual acts that they don’t want to ask of their partners for fear of being judged.
While we’re on the topic of prostitution, let’s also address this myth…
Currently, only 36 percent of dates involve the man asking the woman out, paying and initiating sex, according to a new study from the University of Kansas (file photo)
MYTH: ALL SEX WORKERS ARE ADDICTED TO DRUG AND FORCE THEM TO DO IT
Most people believe that any woman who decides to sell her body for sex must have a very bad reason for doing so. She is struggling with addiction, comes from a troubled background, and is forced to turn to sex work because she has no other way to earn money.
the truth: Yes, some sex workers come from difficult backgrounds and some have substance abuse problems, but this is far from the whole story.
If your definition of sex work is providing a sexual service for money, it has expanded considerably in the last decade.
Many sex workers never have physical contact with their clients or meet them in person. Not all sex work happens on a street corner, either.
Some women do it to finance their college studies through sites like Sugar Daddy (marketed as a dating site but used to connect young women with rich older men who don’t just take them out for ice cream) or Onlyfans. where women can provide ‘private videos’ for money.
Sex work can be lucrative and many women like the autonomy it can provide.
Viewing all sex workers as damaged oversimplifies the complexity of their lives and increases the stigma surrounding sex work.
Many women in the industry choose to be sex workers and many come from stable and supportive backgrounds.
MYTH: YOU CAN’T GET PREGNANT DURING YOUR PERIOD.
Yes, this old chestnut is still running around, even though there are plenty of ‘menstrual babies’ running around who are living proof that it’s not true. Ovulation and menstruation are supposed to be too far apart for conception to occur.
the truth: Although the chances are lower, it is still possible to conceive during your period because sperm can live in the body for up to five days. If a woman ovulates shortly after her period, there is a chance that an egg may be fertilized.
That is why it is not a reliable contraceptive method.
MYTH: WATCHING PORN DAMAGES RELATIONSHIPS AND IS ADDICTIVE
There is a widespread belief that pornography is bad. It is considered something that women hate, that destroys trust in relationships and turns men into sex addicts.
It was considered such a threat that a thorough and reputable investigation into men’s use of pornography was finally conducted. And guess what? While some men struggle with compulsive porn use, most who view it do so without significant negative impacts on their relationship or well-being.
the truth: Most men watch pornography for entertainment. It’s a fun thing to do, just like masturbating is a fun thing to do. Many women also enjoy watching, and couples who watch together report greater sexual satisfaction than those who don’t.
It’s not without its problems: It’s true that watching too much porn can make sex with your partner seem uninteresting by comparison. (The variety of sex acts offered on porn sites is mind-blowing.) But pornography is not the problem. The problems come from men thinking pornography is real-life sex and confusing it with sex education.
HOMOSEXUALITY CAN BE CURE
This is one of the most damaging and persistent myths of all: thinking that homosexuality is a disease or defect that can be ‘cured’ through ‘conversion therapy’.
Proponents of this conspiracy claim that sexual orientation is a choice and that LGBTQ+ people can be “reprogrammed” to be heterosexual through religious or psychological methods.
the truth: “No scientific basis” is a term you will become very familiar with throughout this article. It absolutely applies here.
Most major psychological and psychiatric organizations have discredited conversion therapy as ineffective and extremely harmful (it can lead to depression, anxiety, and self-harm).
Fortunately, it is a theory that a minority clings to. Diverse sexual orientation is widely accepted as a natural part of human behavior, influenced by factors such as genetics, hormones, and environmental factors. None of which are curable.
Check out Tracey’s product ranges (Supersex and Edge) at lovehoney. Give the gift of good sex this Christmas! Details are available at traceycox.com.