It is, of course, the magic word, but it seems that “please” is losing its power.
Today, the word is used in fewer than one in ten requests, according to one study.
Researchers at the University of California, Los Angeles recorded 17 hours of conversations in stores, hair salons and at home, and analyzed the number of times people said ‘please’.
They found that it is used in only 7 percent of requests, and often only when faced with someone who is in a bad mood, uncomfortable, or has already rejected a request.
The research, published in Social Psychology Quarterly, also revealed that women are less likely than men to say please when addressing other women.
Researchers found that please is used in only 7 percent of requests, and often only when faced with someone who is in a bad mood, uncomfortable, or has already rejected a request.
Researchers at the University of California, Los Angeles (pictured) recorded 17 hours of conversations in stores, hair salons and at home, and analyzed the number of times people said “please.”
That helps explain why women are less likely to receive a favor: They receive one only 5 percent of the time, compared to 8 percent for men. Andrew Chalfoun, a sociologist at UCLA, says: “Policymakers have warned of a rise in incivility, driven by a fragmentation of social ties, and have sought to curb these trends by promoting civility.”
However, he said that “please” was not necessarily a sign of politeness, but was simply used when social situations required it, such as when dealing with an uncomfortable person.
Dr. Chalfoun added: “This specific use of ‘please’ explains its rarity. ‘Please’ is not a generic indicator of politeness.
‘It may be tempting to conclude, as many have done, that the rarity of “please” is yet another sign that we are becoming less polite.
“However, this study suggests that “please,” like “thank you,” is not a universal politeness signal that should be used whenever possible.”
