A worried mother who put her twin daughters on a diet despite only one of them needing to lose weight has turned to the internet for advice.
The woman posted a ‘Am I an idiot?’ forum on Reddit, explaining the situation with her 14-year-old identical twin daughters, Megan and Alana.
The twins are both 1.5 metres tall, but Megan weighs more than 70 kilos while Alana weighs 43 kilos.
She claimed that Megan is obese and put the whole family on a diet, but Alana feels it’s unfair that the whole family has to change their lifestyle.
“I tried to put the emphasis on staying healthy rather than losing weight. However, Alana assumed that the real reason for this new diet is that I want Megan to lose weight,” the mother said.
A mother put her identical twin daughters on a diet because one of them is obese
The woman has cut down on sugar, junk food and unhealthy snacks, but her other daughter feels it is unfair that the whole family has to change their lifestyle.
‘She started complaining that it wasn’t fair that she had to diet too because her sister was fat.
‘I told her (Alana) that I didn’t want Megan to feel singled out and like she was the only one being punished for her weight.’
She said the twins used to be the same weight until they were about seven, then Megan started gaining weight.
When the girls were 11, Megan was considered overweight and her mother took them to a doctor for advice.
“I went to see a doctor for advice and he told me not to worry too much because many children gain weight just before puberty and then ‘balance out’ after the growth spurt,” she said.
However, the twins went through a growth spurt last year and Megan’s weight continues to increase, so the mother decided to implement a healthy diet for the whole family.
“I gradually started cutting back on sugar, junk food and unhealthy snacks. I cook them hearty, low-calorie meals packed with vegetables and protein so they feel full after eating,” she said.
‘Neither of the twins are very athletic, so I’ve also tried to encourage them to do physical activities, like swimming, cycling, trampolining, etc.’
Now that Alana has criticized her mother for forcing the entire family to diet even though Megan is the only one who needs to lose weight, the woman is wondering if she did the right thing.
Readers slammed the mom for her decision, claiming she took the wrong approach to dieting.
“You’ve almost committed to this idea that health is valuable for everyone and not a punishment, but then it seems like you don’t really believe it,” one person said.
‘That whole “we’re pretending to do this so my fat kid won’t realize we secretly just want a skinny kid” thing you say at the end… I think you need to understand your own relationship with health a little bit before you try to do a family restructuring.’
The woman said that neither of her twins are very athletic, so she encourages them to get physical activity by jumping on the trampoline.
“If you try to trick your daughter into losing weight by pretending to value health, you will only foster an unhealthy relationship with food and her body. The more you lie to her, the more confused and disturbed she will become.”
“Her last line is very telling. She doesn’t want a single person to feel like they’re being punished for their weight,” said another.
“No one should feel punished for their weight, much less by the one person who is supposed to give them unconditional love.”
“You’re putting Alana on a diet because you don’t want to have a conversation with your other daughter about her unhealthy weight,” a third person said.
‘Alana is not her sister’s keeper, you need to step up and act better as a mother.’
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