Martine McCutcheon has revealed she “cried and cried and cried” after being diagnosed with attention deficit disorder (ADD).
The actress and singer, 48, received the diagnosis after the death of her brother LJ, Laurence John, who died of an unknown cause at the age of 31.
Martine had been struggling to get out of bed after LJ’s death in 2022, and was later told she had the condition, which has symptoms similar to ADHD but without hyperactivity.
Speaking on the new podcast A Gentle Star: The Showercast on Wednesday, Martine said she was in “complete denial” at the time of her diagnosis, grieving LJ and also living with ME (chronic fatigue syndrome).
“At first I went into denial, total denial, because my brother had passed away,” he said. ‘I was diagnosed with MS and I thought: I can’t accept this diagnosis and whatever it means.
Martine McCutcheon revealed on the A Gentle Start: The Showercast podcast that she ‘cried and cried and cried’ after being diagnosed with attention deficit disorder (ADD).
The 48-year-old actress and singer received the diagnosis after the death of her brother LJ, Laurence John, who died of an unknown cause at the age of 31.
‘I need to continue living life as I am. And in a way he was right.
“And then when I finally looked at it, I cried and cried and cried and cried, I cried, and it was only because if I had known how different things could have been, how much more easily I could have done it.” I could have done things.’
Speaking about understanding her diagnosis, Martine said: “I always felt like there were certain things I saw differently, different things I struggled with compared to other people, but different things came very easy to me, and I realized when I got my diagnosis.” ADD diagnosis, I had spent so much time trying to be a square in a circle, and it was exhausting.
‘It was very exhausting. It was very difficult. And in a way, I feel like I wasn’t meant to find out, as sad as it was, because I lost a lot of things in my life.
‘I struggled with a lot of things that I don’t think I would have necessarily done. I think if I had known before those four years that I had ADD, I don’t know if I would have been able to cope with it the way I do now.’
The actress lost her brother LJ, who had a mild form of special needs, at the age of 31 in late 2022.
In October of that year, she told her fans to “hug each other tighter” in a thoughtful post.
‘A Saturday of blue sky and sun. Have a wonderful weekend everyone. “Hold each other tighter and make memories,” she wrote at the time.
Martine had been struggling to get out of bed after the death of her brother LJ in 2022, and was later told she had the condition, which has symptoms similar to ADHD but without hyperactivity.
She said the website designer was due to marry her fiancé Jay Eaton, 49, in a month and that Martine, who was to be maid of honour, had seen her brother just days before his death.
She wrote: ‘My heart is forever broken. My little brother, my gentle giant, sadly passed away suddenly 2 weeks ago. He was 31 years old.
“There is no medical explanation as to why we lost him so soon and while we investigate further, we have to accept that nothing will bring our son back to us.”
‘LJ (Laurence John) was born when I was 15 and from the moment I first held him in my arms, I felt very proud and fiercely protective of him. He was quite a character!
“He made us all laugh and loved nothing more than making a plan, having a great playlist, getting people together and generally laughing.”
He also thanked fans for their support after his shocking death.
‘Hello everyone, I hope you are well. This is the first time I’ve been on Instagram since I shared my post about losing my brother a couple of weeks ago. First of all, thank you very much for the love, it means a lot to my family.
The actress lost her brother LJ, who had a mild form of special needs, at the age of 31 in late 2022 (pictured in 2013).
‘Today was the first day I went back to work, I didn’t know if I could do it or not; I was nervous, for a bit of filming and a meeting, and I’m so glad I did it.
She continued: “I know my brother would want me to keep going and he was very proud of me and the fact that I liked to inspire people and make them feel good and give them a little bit of magic when I could.”
“I felt it with me and I did it the first day back. I did it.’
Alongside the emotional clip, she wrote: ‘Thank you for your support. Getting back to it little by little. “I know LJ would want me to continue.”
‘He was proud of me and understood why I do what I do. Grief is an old and strange thing and there is no one way to deal with it, but it felt good to do some work. I was nervous but I did it.’
You can listen to Martine’s episode of A Gentle Start: The Showercast podcast from haircare brand Timotei now via Spotify and apple music.