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I have a financial question that I’m embarrassed to even ask, but that I really care about.
Last week I had a very drunken night and lent my friend £3,000, something I don’t remember doing.
Apparently, when we were at the bar, he told me that he needed money to build his mother a wheelchair ramp at her house, and since I was so drunk, I transferred the money to him right then and there. I didn’t realize it until I checked my bank balance the next day.
The problem is that the money is the majority of my savings and I really need to get it back. He is currently refusing, saying that I gave him the money fairly and that I had already told his mother the good news.
Legally, do I have any legal basis to do so?
The Devil’s Drink: A moment of generosity and drunkenness caused a terrible break in a friendship
This is Money’s Sam Barker responds: This question reminds me of the biblical adage that alcohol can be a mocker. You are clearly in a difficult situation, both legally and ethically.
One side of the argument is that you gave the money voluntarily, while the other says you were too drunk to make a logical decision at the time, so the donation shouldn’t count.
To further complicate matters, his friend understandably has no desire to return the money, as he has earmarked it for a very noble cause.
The first step would be to try again to convince your friend that you need the money back, perhaps letting him keep some of it to smooth things over.
If that doesn’t work, you end up relying on the law on what constitutes giving a gift.
English law states that a valid gift requires three things:
- The voluntary intention of the donor to give the gift to the recipient.
- The delivery of the gift to the recipient.
- Acceptance of the gift by the recipient
It is clear that your friend was given the money and accepted it, so the question is whether it was your voluntary intention to give that money.
Legally, you’re on shaky ground. You’d say you didn’t hand over the money voluntarily, because you were drunk at the time, but technically you handed over the money freely and without coercion.
I spoke with an attorney, Keystone Law litigation partner Kelly Tinkler, to get to the bottom of the matter.
The legal situation is two-sided
In short, you may have a case if a) you are willing to take legal action against your friend and b) you have some sort of proof that he was drunk at the time.
Tinkler said: ‘In the absence of some other vitiating factor, such as duress, the donor would only be able to claim the money if he could show that there was no intention to make a donation, either in fact or because he was intoxicated to the extent that he lacked mental capacity to do so.
Without evidence, perhaps in the form of people willing to say that you were indeed drunk, you may have no basis for belief.
‘In this case, the donor has a significant evidence problem. He says he does not remember making the payment. In the absence of third-party evidence, the dispute may come down to the donor’s lack of evidence against what the recipient of the donation says.’
In other words, without evidence, perhaps in the form of people willing to say that you were indeed drunk, you may have no grounds to claim your money back.
The area of contract law shows examples in which the state of intoxication played for and against people when making financial decisions.
Tinkler added: ‘In one 2017 case, it was alleged that businessman Mike Ashley had entered into a contract to provide a £15m bonus to a contractor, in the context of drinks at a bar.
‘The judge concluded that while intoxication was not definitive in this case, the informal atmosphere and jocular nature of the conversation meant it was unlikely the parties intended to create a contract. He also noted that the purpose of the meeting was not to discuss bonus agreements.
‘By contrast, in 2023, a high-roller player, Lester Hui, was found liable for losses of £590,000 at Aspinall’s casino.
‘When his losses reached £500,000, he asked for an extension of his credit line by £300,000 and was granted £100,000.
‘It was held that, despite his drunken state, there was an intention to create a contract, given that he had lost £400,000 on previous occasions and, quite extraordinarily, drove his Bentley home.’
It might be worth doing some soul searching to see if that £3,000 is more important to you than your friendship.
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