Whether it’s a one-night stand or a long-term fling, cheating has been the heartbreaking bane of many relationships.
But scientists say there is more than one way for someone to cheat on their partner.
In an analysis of more than 300 studies, researchers at Stony Brook University found three distinct forms of infidelity, most of which do not involve any sexual activity.
In addition to sex, cheaters could be guilty of “electronic infidelity” when texting or engaging in online relationships.
Couples can also cheat by forming deep emotional bonds with someone outside their relationship.
This form of adultery was found to be even more common than sexual cheating: 35 percent of men and 30 percent of women admitted to having committed “romantic infidelity.”
Researchers warn that this could lead to a situation where couples have very different ideas about what counts as cheating.
Lead author Dr. Benjamin says, “For the average person, this underscores the importance of clear communication in romantic relationships about boundaries and expectations of exclusivity.”
ROMANTIC INFIDELITY: Dave Grohl (right) recently admitted to cheating on his wife Jordyn Blum (left) and having a secret baby with another woman. Researchers say that forming deep emotional relationships with someone other than your partner is a common and particularly harmful form of infidelity that doesn’t always include any sexual behavior.
As simple as cheating may seem, scientists have found that definitions and understandings of infidelity can vary widely.
In a meta-analysis of research on the topic of infidelity, researchers collected 305 different articles containing data on infidelity rates.
The resulting data set contained interviews and surveys of more than 500,000 people and provided new insights into different forms of cheating.
Of those surveyed, 25 percent of men and 14 percent of women admitted to having been sexually unfaithful.
However, Dr. Warach and his colleagues, writing in Personal Relationships, write: “Forms of infidelity that include non-sexual components are at least as common, if not more common, than infidelity that is purely sexual in nature.” “.
23 percent of men and 14 percent of women admitted to electronic cheating, which includes behaviors such as online flirting or engaging in sexual conversations over the Internet.
According to the study, this has become more common in recent years as the use of social media and digital technologies has become more widespread.
Likewise, twice as many women admitted to having been romantically unfaithful than to having had a sexual relationship with someone other than their partner.
SEXUAL INFIDELITY: Kevin Hart (right) admitted to having sex with another woman while his wife Eniko Parrish Hart (left) was pregnant. Sexual activity outside of the relationship is the most recognizable and most studied form of infidelity, but researchers say it may not be the most common.
As common as these forms of adultery turned out to be, they were also the most overlooked by researchers.
Only 9.5 percent of the studies included in the meta-analysis concerned emotional infidelity, while electronic infidelity occurred in only 5.6 percent.
What makes this particularly problematic is that both digital and emotional cheating can be just as damaging, if not more so, than sexual forms of infidelity.
Researchers note that a couple may feel more betrayed upon discovering that their partner is in a long-term romantic relationship than upon learning of a momentary indiscretion.
However, the data collected in this analysis also points to a surprising lack of taboos around non-sexual forms of cheating.
Previous research shows that people are much more likely to admit to sexual infidelity when anonymous than during in-person or telephone interviews.
However, when talking about romantic infidelity there was no difference between the anonymous and in-person methods.
The researchers write: “The absence of this finding for emotional infidelity is consistent with research suggesting that it is less stigmatized than sexual infidelity.”
ELECTRONIC INFIDELITY: Former footballer and BBC Sport presenter Jermaine Jenas (left) admitted sending inappropriate text messages to women at the BBC while married to Ellie Penfold (right). This form of infidelity has become more common due to the rise of social media and can involve online flirting, engaging in sexual conversations, or exchanging explicit images.
Combined with a lack of communication about what is considered infidelity, this could lead to serious relationship problems.
Speaking to PsyPost, Dr Warach says: ‘Research has previously shown that individuals have very different perceptions of what these terms mean.
“What one person considers ‘infidelity’ may differ from what their partner understands.”
However, the problem of defining infidelity not only affects partners in their relationships, but also scientists trying to understand the psychology of deception.
Of the 305 articles studied, about 30 percent used extremely vague terms like “cheated on” or “I’ve been unfaithful.”
This leaves it ambiguous as to whether the infidelity in question was sexual, electronic, or emotional in nature.
Dr. Warach concludes: ‘Our study shows that inconsistent definitions and measurement methods contribute to confusion about the prevalence of romantic infidelity in the research literature.
“This is an important problem for our field of research.”