A Minnesota pastor has created a polyamorous couples farm with his two youngest lovers and reveals how they live their polyamorous life.
Bryan Demeritte, 52, lives on his 10-acre farm in Waseca with his partners Deron Demeritte, 38, and Joshua Rodriguez, 24.
The trio hunt and fish, raise chickens, and grow their own fruits and vegetables in a polyamorous commune called Loving More Farmstead.
Bryan, who also works as a part-time Unitarian pastor and seminary professor, describes Deron and Joshua as his two husbands.
Talking to him Minnesota Star Tribune NewspaperBryan told the outlet that in the non-monogamous community the three are considered “nesting partners.”
Bryan Demeritte, center, lives on a 10-acre farm in Waseca with partners Deron Demeritte, right, and Joshua Rodriguez, left.
Bryan, who also works as a part-time Unitarian pastor and seminary professor, describes Deron and Joshua as his two husbands.
According to Bryan, he is the “hinge,” meaning Bryan has a physical and romantic relationship with both men, but they don’t have one with each other.
Joshua and Bryan have been in a committed relationship for five years, while he and Deron consider themselves “brother husbands.”
Bryan is a former teacher who grew up Baptist in Missouri, while Deron is originally from the Bahamas and has experience in industrial and commercial HVAC.
The two have been legally married for 11 years, with Joshua – who also plans to adopt her last name, as he grew up in Boston –
Deron told the outlet: “I love Josh, but I’m not in love with him. We’re almost like brothers.”
The trio recently moved from their five-bedroom ranch as business and relationship partners into what they have dubbed Loving More Farmstead.
They have three barns, a corn field, four small vineyards, an apple orchard, geese and 72 Heritage chickens.
They also hope to add a market garden and raise sheep for lamb meat.
According to Bryan, he doesn’t know of any other polyamorous, multiracial, gay farm households.
The trio recently moved from their five-bedroom ranch as business and relationship partners into what they have dubbed Loving More Farmstead.
So far they have had no problems adjusting to the rural community, and Bryan says: “We are happier than ever.”
“I think people in Minnesota are very welcoming, but they also leave you alone. We’re all people. We’re just trying to love.”
While her lifestyle is not typical, it is not as unconventional as it was considered in the past according to publications.
A recent New York Times article on non-monogamy and polyamory describes them as a trendy approach to relationships.
A New Yorker article from last December titled ‘‘How did polyamory become so popular?’ She pointed to relationships depicted in books, films, perfume ads and television shows.
While local non-monogamy group MNPoly has reported that its membership has grown to over 4,000 members, around 1,000 more than in 2020.
Marie LePage, a life and non-monogamy coach in Minneapolis, told the outlet: “It’s become more accepted.
While her lifestyle is not typical, it is not as unconventional as publications once considered.
‘Personally, I feel more comfortable telling a stranger (about my non-monogamous relationships).’
While MNPoly co-president Maija Hitt added: “We’re trying to normalize non-monogamy.
‘For young people, this is no longer a big problem. They are openly non-monogamous and do not hide it.’
According to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, one-third of all American adults say open marriages are somewhat or completely acceptable.
Half of adults under 30 also said open marriages are acceptable, the survey found.
Demeritte is working on a book titled The More Love, the Better, which will address non-monogamy in the 21st century from her theological perspective.
He told the outlet: “Someone you know is non-monogamous. It’s becoming more and more common. It’s time to let people be who they want to be and live how they want to live.”
