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Katy, 45 years old
VITAL STATISTICS
Single for 18 months, no children.
CURRENT ROLE
Vacation rental agent.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO MEET
Someone intelligent and well-traveled, emotionally available and with a sense of humor.
APPOINTMENT PAST
My longest relationship lasted three years, but he wasn’t the right person. I used to rely on online dating, but men use the apps like a Panini football sticker album: bin, bin, keep. They no longer seem willing to invest much in finding someone special. For now, I will comfort myself with my French bulldog.
NERVES BEFORE THE DATE?
Yes, because the result seemed important to me. But sometimes I’m at my best when nerves strike.
FIRST IMPRESSIONS?
Ben stood up from the table (a good sign), dressed in a rather stereotypical work suit. I don’t want to sound derogatory because he was well dressed and clean shaven. I leaned in to kiss him on the cheek because I suspected he’s the kind of person who wouldn’t want to make me feel uncomfortable by receiving one himself.
EASY TO TALK TO?
Yes, but if I’m honest, I went into my alpha energy and asserted myself from the beginning, pausing the conversation to get the waiter’s attention so I could order. I felt like I was the stronger part. We talked about Ben’s past relationship: he was married and I wasn’t.
I lit up when I talked about my dog, also named Ben. Ben the dog picks up on my energy and understands that I am the leader of the pack because he has been well trained. Date Ben had a poodle a long time ago, but he didn’t go outside and he wasn’t trained either.
EMBARRASSING MOMENTS?
Not for us, but one of the waiters tripped and threw a large tray of crockery and glassware into the air. He landed everywhere, poor thing.
DID SPARKS FLY?
I love to flirt during a date but there was no physical attraction for me. I couldn’t figure out what lit Ben’s fire. I can see why they paired us up: we’re at the same stage of life and he said he looked like his celebrity crush, Emily Blunt. But our relationship was like the one you would have with a girlfriend.
SEE IT AGAIN?
No, I don’t see the point, to be honest. We didn’t have enough in common. Ben said that he loves humor and yet when I made a joke, he didn’t even laugh.
WHAT DO YOU THINK HE THOUGHT OF YOU?
I think I checked a lot of boxes before closing the date. I again went into my alpha energy to receive the bill.
WOULD YOUR FAMILY LIKE IT?
Yes, Ben is very docile but they wouldn’t put us together.
kATY VERDICT 6.5/10
APPRECIATED? ben put me at ease.
REGRETS? None.
COFFEE OR TAXI? Coffee.
Ben, 49 years old
VITAL STATISTICS
Divorced, no children.
CURRENT ROLE
WORK in finance.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO MEET
A HOT, familiar, fun woman who stays in shape. Social media addicts are a no-no.
APPOINTMENT PAST
I was with my ex-wife for ten years and we were married for three. I’ve tried dating apps since then, but half the women don’t bother to respond. They are very distant.
NERVES BEFORE THE DATE?
I was a little nervous. I lost my older brother to leukemia a year ago and it affected me greatly. But mom reads this column and she told me she had to do it. I put on a suit and bought a bouquet of pink peonies.
FIRST IMPRESSIONS?
Katy is petite, has a lovely figure and is very pretty. I gave her the flowers and complimented her on her appearance, but there was no compliment in return.
EASY TO TALK TO?
She was very confident and at one point said we should order. Maybe she wanted us to get him out of the way so we could chat. We had the same fish starter and main course, so Katy ordered for me. I’m usually asked about growing up in the United States and being a former tennis player. But instead, Katy probed me with questions like, ‘Can I ask you why your marriage didn’t work out?’ Normally I’m cheerful and fun, but an interrogation like that doesn’t give you many opportunities for a punchline.
EMBARRASSING MOMENTS?
Katy (again!) took the lead and ordered spinach and broccoli to share. I put a floret too big on the fork and had to break it in half while it dangled from my mouth. He was going to make a joke, but by then he already had Katy like a cold fish.
DID SPARKS FLY?
I do not think. I have a feeling Katy wasn’t attracted to me, but I’ve been out of the game for a while. I wasn’t too attracted to her.
SEE HER AGAIN?
At my suggestion, we exchanged numbers at the table. When I suggested it to her, she said, ‘Awwww!’ That kind of condescending reaction is one of my biggest pet peeves. I knew it had been friend zoned. The most animated she got was talking about her dog.
WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE THOUGHT OF YOU?
Katy didn’t reveal much. She asked me three times why she didn’t own my own home and if she worried me about not being on the property ladder. But then she sent me a photo of the flowers I gave her in a vase, which was a nice touch.
WOULD YOUR FAMILY LIKE IT?
Mom agreed that they were testing me to see if I fit into Katy’s world.
Ben’s Verdict: 7/10
APPRECIATED? Katy is a nice person.
REGRETS? No.
COFFEE OR TAXI? Cab.