When a carefree Queen Mary hit the beach Down Under last week, every woman heard her message loud and clear. The timing was perfect – and it speaks volumes about her marriage to Frederik, writes AMANDA GOFF

If you’re like me, you would have pored over the photos of Queen Mary on Balmoral Beach last week, looking for the familiar and oh-so-identifiable signs of a scorned wife: self-pity, sadness, shame.

After all, the photographs were taken almost a year after her ‘Romeo’ husband, King Frederick, was caught enjoying a cozy night out in Madrid with Mexican socialite Genoveva Casanova, sparking a crisis in the Danish royal family and provoked feverish speculation in the press. about the state of the couple’s marriage.

And yet, I saw none of the telltale signs of distress as Mary frolicked on the beach with her friends. The only thing I saw was a 52 year old woman who looked sensational.: sporty, fit, toned and laughing out loud.

The Tassie girl seemed really happy to be back on sunny Australian soil, and we were very happy to have her home.

It’s a lesson for all of us ladies: forget that revenge is a dish best served cold. Revenge is a dish best served with a sophisticated and flattering swimsuit, looking the best you’ve ever had, enjoying one of our best beaches, under an incomparable blue sky.

If you have reached Mary’s age and have not experienced some form of deception, pain or disappointment on the part of your husband, whether it be an affair, a one-night stand, emotional deception or, in Fred’s case, anything -advised a late-night stroll with a socialite that resulted in a sensationalist frenzy–then your marriage is going quite well.

Marriage is hard work and I congratulate those who work hard to achieve it. Not for me, but that’s a topic for another day.

It has been 12 months since Fred and Genoveva were photographed walking through Buen Retiro Park. The rumor exploded: was this Mexican temptress Fred’s secret lover? Fred, Genevieve and the palace denied it, and I am not suggesting that any affair occurred. But what I’m pretty sure of (let’s call it female intuition) is that seeing those photos of the King with a beautiful divorcee like Genevieve would have shaken the loyal and obedient Queen to the core.

The world gasped, especially us Australians. How could Fred, a man who has spent his entire life in the spotlight, have been so careless? He should have known what his friendship with Genoveva would have been like. Meanwhile, we were all assuming the worst, waiting with bated breath for what our beloved Mary would do next.

Part of me hoped to see her tearfully arriving at Sydney Airport the next day, greeted by the open arms of her countrymen and women..

But Maria had other plans.

She wasn’t going anywhere. Mary did what millions of wives around the world do after being shamed by their husbands: she stayed.

Strong women don’t play victims. They rarely indulge in self-pity. They hold their heads high, stay calm (at least in public) and move on.

They may cry with their friends and sob in the shower. They may throw vases, yell and scream behind closed doors.

But they stay. Like Queen Mary.

Stoic. Strong. Fierce.

Queen Mary reminds me of Princess Diana when Charles admitted his affair with Camilla Parker-Bowles. She got up, dusted herself off, and shocked the world in that ‘revenge dress’ (a low-cut black evening dress by Christina Stambolian) while attending a Vanity Fair fundraiser at London’s Serpentine Gallery. She showed the world that she was a survivor and that she wasn’t going to let her husband’s adultery get her down.

Don’t get me wrong: the situations are not identical here. Charles admitted his affair; Frederik has made it clear that nothing bad was happening. But when I saw Mary in her flattering pink Copenhagen Cartel swimsuit (which, by the way, is $247), all I could think was: this is Mary’s revenge swimsuit.

Then something else occurred to me: if anyone wears the pants from now on in the Danish royal palace, it’s our Mary.

Remember those royal engagements that followed the tabloid Fred and Genoveva scandal? The icy stares, the stilted body language: all the signs women recognize: I’m with you, but not like we used to be. I have forgiven you, but I will not forget it.

Fred knows he has work to do and he doesn’t want to lose Mary.

I can’t know for sure whether the royal couple has gotten over the shame of Fred’s ill-advised friendship with Genevieve. Those of us who have been through marital crises will know that once that initial trust is broken, it is rarely the same again..

But in my experience, one thing is very clear: wives rarely leave in situations like this. If anything, the husband’s mistake (whether a moment of poor judgment as in Fred’s case or a full-blown extramarital affair) only makes them stronger.

That’s why what I’m about to say is not directed at wives, but at the “other woman”: if you find yourself involved with a married man, remember: he is He will never leave his marriage and she will never leave him. She may punish him forever, but she’ll stay, even if it’s just to spite you, to show that she’s “won.”

And if you’re the wife in this situation, chances are you’ve already decided to give it another chance… but my advice? Pack your bags now.

The old saying is true: once a cheater, chances are you’ll always be a cheater. Fred’s affair scandal may have been a false alarm, but other men caught red-handed don’t change their ways.

You may have “won” by preserving your marriage, but what exactly is it? have did you win? A cheater who doesn’t respect you. It’s hardly winning the lottery, right?

And believe me, I’ve seen it enough times. The men wait until the coast is clear before returning to their old ways. They just can’t help it. Many do not want to address the underlying reasons behind their deception; whether it be addiction, trauma, sadness or stress. Quick fixes like affairs don’t work.

I have seen too many strong, beautiful, successful, intelligent women hand over their lives and freedom to low-level men who don’t value them and chase anything in a skirt once their backs are turned. It saddens me greatly.

Mary, it’s good to see you so happy in Australia without your husband by your side. It’s great to know that you’re moving on with your life and I hope you’ll be more cautious with your friendships in the future.

I take my hat off to you for sticking with your marriage. If it had been my husband in those photos of Madrid, regardless of the innocent explanation, I don’t think I would be able to stay.