Scientists have revealed that a person’s birth order directly influences their dating choices.
The theory is based on the idea that your birth order determines who you are, influencing your personality traits and the dynamics of your relationships.
The core idea is that opposites attract. In other words, people seek partners whose birth order complements their own, the licensed marriage counselor and family therapist explained.
For example, eldest daughters and younger sons tend to have opposite personality traits, making them more compatible. Wright herself is the eldest daughter married to a younger son, so she can attest to this.
Understanding what your birth order says about you can even help you “predict” who you’ll be attracted to.
Science suggests that a person’s birth order has a major influence on the type of romantic partner they seek.
“In my professional and personal experience as a firstborn, firstborns tend to receive more attention and resources from their parents,” Wright told Business Insider.
“It can lead to higher academic performance, greater leadership qualities and a more conscientious nature.”
Younger siblings, on the other hand, “tend to develop a more sociable and accommodating personality,” she said, because parents generally take a more relaxed approach when raising their younger children.
Because of this, older siblings and younger siblings form a complementary romantic pair, with the firstborn naturally inclined to take charge while the younger sibling is happy to cooperate.
However, dating someone who has the same birth order as you can lead to disaster. For example, two firstborns may fight over who will have control at certain points in a relationship.
On the other hand, two younger children might have difficulty finding structure and distributing responsibilities in a relationship.
The theory is not so clear in the case of only children or middle children, who can identify with traits of both the eldest and the youngest.
But there are some traits that tend to be common specifically in only children and middle children, and these people might look for a partner who complements these aspects of their personalities.
Middle children, for example, tend to be very adaptable and compromise-able, so they could be a good match for firstborns.
Only children tend to be sensible, conscientious and independent, so they often combine well with last-borns.
The birth order theory has been generating a lot of buzz on social media, with many people on TikTok and Instagram confirming that their own dating history supports this theory.
“I’m the oldest daughter and all my relationships have been with the younger children,” said one TikTok user.
“I’m amazed,” she added.
But the theory of birth order dating is not an immutable rule. After all, every relationship is unique and cannot be defined by assumptions about what makes two people compatible.
“We can’t speak in absolutes, whether it’s who you are because of your astrological sign or who you are because of your birth order,” Wright said.