Warne and Waugh’s TV ‘bater’ is too much to carry on Ashes TV coverage

It took some time to find a way to drown out the whining that came from certainly the worst ever TV show of an Ashes series opening day, but it was possible.

It was just a matter of syncing the BBC radio commentary with the BT Sport photos.

This preventive measure was necessary, as those who had spent £25 a month watching the Ashes soon found out. As if things weren’t grim enough when Rory Burns was tossed out by a leg-stub half volley, three overs later we were still treated to Shane Warne’s relentless glee on the subject.

England fans who watched the disastrous day one of the first Ashes Test against Australia also had to endure the gleeful taunts of Australian commentary as they watched from home

England opener Rory Burns was bowled by Mitchell Starc with the first-ever ball of the day

England opener Rory Burns was bowled by Mitchell Starc with the first-ever ball of the day

Shane Warne was overjoyed when his Australian side turned the screw over England

Shane Warne was overjoyed when his Australian side turned the screw over England

‘You’re on your way. See you later. Where is she going?’ was Warne’s first ‘insight’. He was still gleefully on the subject in the moments before England lost their second wicket.

‘Can you believe it? First Stone! Lost his stump!’ The participants in Warney’s School of Glee were “Gilly” and “Junior” – Adam Gilchrist and Mark Waugh for the uninitiated, although the absence of any subtitles to say the least eight slack hours of relentless Aussie talk, minimal technical acumen and a score shown in the Australian format of wickets dropped before runs scored.

Also on the commentary team was the ghastly Kerry “Skull” O’Keeffe, though the bantz didn’t quite descend to the chat of him who caused such hilarity at a Fox studio a year ago to Warne. It started: ‘I saw this woman sitting in my living room…’ Enough said.

From an English perspective, there were occasional moments of gratuitous satisfaction. Warne was cut off in full flow as he was about to give voice to the joy of seeing Ollie Pope wince when hit.

“I love Ollie Pope’s facial. He wanted to show…’ And then a gambling ad appeared.

But this was meager compensation, in a broadcast that revealed the impoverishment of BT Sport’s approach to the Ashes they face after buying the rights from host channel Fox Sports.

BT didn’t send any commentators to Australia, so the only release from the Australian jump-off was Isa Guha, who was only given a seat among the banter traders half an hour before lunch. “I feel outnumbered,” she said diplomatically.

Isa Guha's introduction to commentary before lunch was a very welcome change

Isa Guha’s introduction to commentary before lunch was a very welcome change

Canceled from it all, Michael Vaughan would certainly have given some back to Warney, Junior and Co, although BT Sport did have some batters in their London studio, had they chosen to deploy them.

Steve Harmison was as convincing as he has proven on talkSPORT’s outstanding cricket team. Sir Alastair Cook provided a detailed insight into the intense journey down the hill to the Gabba on the England team bus on race morning.

But there was no thought of making them – or the ones like Moeen Ali, Matt Prior, Mark Butcher and Heather Knight, promoted by BT Sport’s PR agency on Monday – an integral part of the commentary.

The voice-overs from London during the play were fleeting and even during the lunch break, the program director gave priority to replaying the horrors that had transpired. It took 20 minutes for Harmonison and Cook to get much of a word.

Presenter Matt Smith had his own struggle to be heard. A technical glitch at the top of the program meant that his introduction was drowned out by a prolonged beep. And then there was the camera error that allowed Joe Root’s pre-cast interview to be captured only by a camera embedded in a tree stump.

The need to switch to the BBC’s TMS feed – which takes five minutes to sync with BBC Sounds’ pause button – eventually became overwhelming. There was a world of nuance and thought, in the form of Ian Chappell, Steve Finn and Simon Mann.

Former England captain Alastair Cook was based in BT Sport's studio and offered analytics

Former England captain Alastair Cook was based in BT Sport’s studio and offered analytics

Due to a technical malfunction, viewers could only view the toss via a stump camera

Due to a technical malfunction, viewers could only view the toss via a stump camera

But it will be a very long winter without Sky Sports, the standard-bearers of excellence who have given cricket a new depth of meaning with a multitude of gadgets, data sets and graphics, not to mention two of the outstanding sports channels of our time. , Nasser Hussain and Michael Atherton.

Instead, we can expect more of the same from the grinning Glenn McGrath, who held a BT Sport microphone and, with Solomon’s wisdom, stated of Rory Burns’ dismissal: ‘It’s perfect for picking up a wicket straight away. ‘

And Brett Lee, who showed up just before lunch. “I’m all over the Poms,” he declared. And then left.

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