A California woman goes viral for a Twitter thread chock full of advice on what people should do before getting married.
Twitter user @cxkenobxkerry shared the advice on July 23 and warned others to discuss topics such as children, religion and finances before making a decision – and also to evaluate sexual compatibility.
The wedding checklist certainly resonated with the social media platform, where over 220,000 people liked her thread and 61,000 retweeted them.
Viral: Twitter user @cxkenobxkerry goes viral for a Twitter thread packed with advice on what people should do before getting married
Suggestions: She shared the advice on July 23 and it certainly resonated with the social media platform, where over 220,000 people liked it
Discussions: She told people to talk about debt, determine how many children they wanted, and to be checked for STDs
The Twitter user list contains 20 points that people should carefully discuss and evaluate before saying ‘I do’ to ensure compatibility.
She said people should get married before discussing debt, savings, and finances, determining how they will split accounts, whether they have debts, salary, expenses, future financial expectations, and whether they plan to include their parents when they get old.
Couples also need to “FULLY and WANT to bond,” she said.
‘No’ I’m not sure ‘and’ what if ‘and’ it is not the right time ‘. you are or you are OFF. ‘
“LOVE is not what sustains relationships,” she noted. “An active commitment to LOVE, despite the crashes, keeps it going. Leave the princess king happily ever after, and you’ll be fine. ‘
What the future holds: She said couples should also tackle anger management issues, make sure they’re on the same page about religion, and discuss their five to 10 year timeline
Honesty: The Twitter user also said to make sure they were sexually compatible and to talk openly about finances
People should discuss their expectations for the future, including how many children they want, when they want them, and whether they are interested in adoption.
Talk about your 5-10 year timeline regarding career / education. Can you move? Willingness to Relocate?’ she continued.
Evaluating ‘levels of religiosity’ is also important and ensuring that a few share ‘basic CORE beliefs about life.’
“Age doesn’t really matter,” she said. ‘In my experience it is about the person and what his worldviews are. When you are young, make sure that the person you are with will allow you to continue growing at your own pace and in your own way. It’s called respect. ‘
Energy: does it match? you decide. Follow your gut, ”she continued.
Clothing: It may seem like a minor problem, but small things add up in the end. Make sure your expectations match with complete comfort.
Expertise? It is unclear whether the Twitter user, who appears to be in his early twenties and is from California, is himself married
Agreement: She also told Twitter users to share details about their savings, discuss social media usage, and determine what kind of opposite sex interactions are okay
Social media: Believe it or not, people will break up about it. Some prefer privacy. Some don’t. Stand on the same page or you will offend each other.
Finding sexual compatibility is also important, she said, writing, “You have to be on the same playing field. Permission, willingness to try things, traumas, etc. … find out.
“Speaking of STIs,” she added. ‘Is being checked. Seek medical attention / informed professional knowledge. Keep those tests up to date and find ways to do it, even within marriage. ‘
Couples should also discuss their definitions of cheating and what they are willing to tolerate.
‘Opposite gender limits: adjust what is in order. What’s not okay. Hugs / handshakes / etc. I know it sounds tribal and there has to be trust, but it would surprise you what people’s limits are. Better to know than not to know, “she said.
If you say it, she did not mention the level of education, family or tribal background, ethnicity or job level, because in her opinion that does not matter in the long term ‘
Also important is evaluating any anger management problems in a partner – and if one person has problems, are they willing to seek therapy?
Finally, she said that couples should discuss their dying wishes, as well as what they would like if they became paralyzed.
‘Say it. Talk about it, ”she said.
She also noted that she did not mention the level of education, family or parentage, ethnicity or job level, because in her opinion none of this matters in the long run. ‘
Although the thread has gone viral, it has had some mixed reactions. Some commentators have praised her for her insightful advice, while others disagreed on several points.