One woman went viral with a hilarious adoption call for a “neurotic” Chihuahua who hates men and other animals.
Tyfanee Fortuna, from New Jersey, has a puppy named Prancer, two, but hopes to find him a forever home.
Her Fecebook message Advertising for Prancer has gone viral as she admitted there’s no way to make him sound ‘tasty’.
Brutally honest Tyfanee presented the dog as a “ neurotic, man-hating, animal-hating, child-hating dog that looks like [a gremlin]
She went on to say that the pup made of her house a ‘demonic Chihuahua hellscape’ and would not live with men, other animals or children, suitable only for a single woman, a lesbian couple or a mother and daughter household.
Her post was again shared with 44,000 on Facebook and many volunteered to bring the Chihuahua home saying he was their ‘dream dog’.
Prancer. a two-year-old chihuahua from New Jersey is looking for a forever home. But his brutally honest foster owner Tyfanee Fortuna admitted he hates men, children and other animals
Tyfanee’s hilarious post went viral after describing that Prancer has a “ neurotic, man-hating, animal-hating, child-hating dog that looks like [a gremlin]
‘Ok, I tried. I’ve been trying to put this dog up for adoption for the past few months and make him sound … tasty. The problem is, it’s just not him, ”Tyfanee began, adding that she and her family were tired.
“Every day we live in the grip of the demonic Chihuahua hellscape he has created in our house …” she said.
“If you’re intrigued and shocked at how this animal sounds, just wait … there’s more.”
Tyfanee went on to go into more details about Prancer and how he had “adjusted” to his life at her home.
Despite his particulars, Tyfanee said Prancer had good qualities and was toilet trained, but said he was a “vessel for a traumatized Victorian child.”
Tyfanee revealed that, in the photo, Prancer was obese when she started to cherish him and was ‘too scared to have a personality’
Prancer came to me obese, dressed in a cashmere sweater, bacon and cheese stuffed in his crate. I should have known at the time that this dog would be a problem, ‘she wrote.
He belonged to an elderly woman who treated him like a human and never socialized him.
“Sprinkle a little genetic predisposition to be nervous, and you’ve come up with a neurotic mess, AKA Prancer,” she added.
She said that during his first week at her home, Prancer was “too terrified to have a personality” and was silent, but turned out to be a force to be reckoned with.
Prancer, in the photo, was never socialized by his former owner and therefore hates children, men and other animals
Tyfanee said the poor pup, in the photo, came up to her in a ‘cashmere sweater’ and took a moment to come out of his shell
“I’m convinced at this point that he’s not a real dog, but more of a vessel for a traumatized Victorian child now haunting our house,” Tyfanee said.
She went on to say that Prancer hated men and only liked women.
‘He hates men more than women, and that says a lot. If you have a husband, don’t bother applying unless you hate him, ”she said.
He attaches himself to a woman / women and takes his job of protection seriously. It offers better protection than the security of the capital, ”she added.
And on top of hating men, Tyfanee revealed that the pup hated other animals too.
The foster mother said the puppy was best suited to living with a single woman, mother-daughter duo, or lesbian couple.
In the hilarious post, Tyfanee Prancer called a ’13 pound rage machine ‘and said he was hard turning her house into a’ Chihuahua hellscape ‘
Do you have other dogs? Cats? Don’t apply unless they enjoy being shaken like a rag doll by a 13-pound rage machine, ‘she wrote.
While Prancer was currently living with Tyfanee’s other seven dogs and 12 cats, she said he still reluctantly lived next to them and didn’t enjoy them.
She added that Prancer couldn’t live with children either, even though he had never been around a child.
I can already imagine the demonic noises and shaking rage that would come out of his body if he were. Prancer wants to be your only child, ”she said.
But despite this list of certain behaviors, Tyfanee also said Prancer had some “good qualities.”
Many people said Prancer was their ‘dream dog’ and some said they wish he had reached them after Tyfanee’s post went viral
“He’s incredibly loyal, although, to tell you a secret, his complex is really just a facade to his fear,” she wrote.
“If someone tried to kill you, I can guarantee that he would run away screeching. But as for company, you’ll never be alone again, ”she added.
She went on to say that Prancer loved driving and was toilet trained, as well as knowing basic commands.
She added that he wouldn’t destroy their owner’s home while they were gone, adding that he was ‘cute to look at’ even though her family called him ‘Bologna face’.
“His ideal home would be with a single woman, a mother and daughter, or a lesbian couple,” she said.
Tyfanee added that the puppy couldn’t live in an apartment because he would ‘bite’ neighbors and added that he would have to be kept in a separate room if you had people.
Prancer is available through Second Chance Pet Adoption League. Tyfanee said she was two years old and would turn 21 “despite resentment”
The foster mom said her family called Prancer ‘bologna face’ but added he was cute and house trained
“I know it’s hard to find someone who wants a chucky doll in a dog’s body, but I have to try,” she said.
Tyfanee explained that Prancer was available for adoption through the Second Chance Pet Adoption League and was based in New Jersey, but could be adopted in the Tri-state area.
If you’ve always wanted your own haunted Victorian child in the body of a small dog who hates men and children, send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Oh, he’s also only 2 years old and will probably turn 21 through sheer resentment, so keep that in mind if you’re interested, ‘she concluded.
People loved Tyfanee’s post, which quickly went viral. Having achieved her goal of getting people interested in Prancer, a number of women have said he was their ‘dream dog’.
‘This is f ****** brilliant Tyf,; one said, while another called the post “pure poetry.”
“I mean, I think he’s really cute, but I don’t think everyone in the house would want this,” someone said.
Many people volunteered to take the little pup home after Tufanee’s hilarious post went viral
“I love him and wish he were mine,” said another.
“Stop, this sounds like my dream,” said another.
‘You are great. I hope this goes viral and you find the perfect home for Prancer, ”someone said.
“This may be the best adoption profile I’ve ever read,” wrote another.