A body language expert has revealed the subtle gestures you can use to make yourself more attractive and the signs from others that show it’s working.
Scott Taylor told FEMAIL that there are several physical indicators you should pay attention to to see if someone finds you attractive whether in romantic, platonic or professional relationships.
The 51-year-old said there are certain body language cues you can use to make someone relax and feel comfortable in your presence, such as “mirroring” their gestures and vocabulary.
It also suggests ways to appear more attractive, such as showing your thumbs, maintaining strong eye contact, pointing your feet toward someone, and blinking less.
A body language expert revealed that there are several physical indicators that you should pay attention to to see if someone finds you attractive whether in romantic, platonic or professional relationships.
Scott Taylor (pictured) said there are certain body language cues you can do to make someone relax and feel comfortable in your presence, such as “mirroring” their gestures and vocabulary.
Scott has trained with the head of the FBI and the lead interrogator at Guantanamo Bay, learning about “body language, facial microexpressions, deception detection, influencing behaviors, and analysis of statements and words.”
‘We are attracted to confidence and positivity, but often we don’t know what that looks like. Confident people take up space,” she explained.
‘Also, if there is an element of attraction towards us, we see that they are relaxed and confident. You have to reach comfort and security first before generating reputation and likeability.
One way to immediately like someone is to capture their gestures and subtly imitate their way of speaking, which is a phenomenon known as isopraxis.
“If you’re trying to build influence and rapport with people, identify what their patterns of gestures, body language and so on are, and reflect that,” Scott said.
He said that it is a technique that he himself uses in his work to win the affection of clients.
“I look at someone’s YouTube or Facebook or whatever and pick up words, gesture patterns, nuances of head tilt, what they do with their hands and everything,” he said.
“So when I talk to them, I know that if I want to really get this person to like me quickly, I need to approach him from the left side, using symmetrical gestures, using this pattern of gestures for important words, I need to use this way of speaking.” pattern and this person walks away in a minute saying, ‘There’s something about that person that I like.’
Scott said the ‘hacking people’ trick works because it shows the person part of their own personality.
‘We have our own prejudice about the name. “We traditionally gravitate toward jobs, fields and things that start with the same letter as our name because we have a higher self-perception,” he said.
Open and confident body language is another way to detect if someone is interested in you, with the belly and feet being some of the strongest indicators of attraction.
‘There is a saying: ‘Belly out, I don’t want you to stay.’ If someone turns that part of his navel away from you or his feet point away from you, that is an indication that he is not comfortable.
‘We want to see the opposite, we want to see open power zones and feet pointing towards you. When we see more openness and accessibility, it’s an initial sign (of attraction).’
Scott said there are ways to encourage openness when meeting someone for the first time simply by removing objects and obstacles between you.
“If you’re sitting at a dinner party or dealing with people, move any barriers between you, because people use them as a security blanket.”
“If someone has their drink in front of them or their mobile phone, the more they build some barriers, they subconsciously show you that they have some feeling of discomfort.”
He said removing barriers like salt and pepper shakers or vases on a table will immediately create openness.
Scott added to make sure you hang up the phone when you’re in a conversation so the other person is your main focus.
‘Be present, fully present. If at the moment you talk to someone you have the phone in your hand, that person is not the most important thing in the room to you,” she said.
One way to immediately like someone is to pick up on their gestures and subtly imitate their way of speaking, which is a phenomenon known as isopraxis.
A more “overt” sign of attraction is how often someone shows their thumbs up, showing trust.
“If you see someone talking and they put their hands in their pockets, hiding their thumbs, it may be a sign of nervousness,” he said.
Scott added that people unknowingly attribute trust when seeing someone’s thumbs, which is why the gesture is a universal sign of approval.
Looking into someone’s eyes can also show signs that they are comfortable and attracted to you.
“From our standard of 12 to 14 blinks per minute, if someone is attracted to you, their pupils will dilate and their blink rate will decrease because we want to take in more of what we like,” Scott said.
He also said there is a way to immediately tell if someone’s smile is “genuine,” citing an old study by French neurologist Guillaume Benjamin Amand Duchenne.
Scott said the ‘Duchenne smile’ is a powerful facial expression in which when someone smiles authentically, crow’s feet-like wrinkles will appear on the sides of both eyes.
“What we’ve realized is that there are two muscles on the sides of the eyes that are emotionally driven,” he said.
Scott added that people unknowingly attribute trust when seeing someone’s thumbs, which is why the gesture is a universal sign of approval.
“We pick it up unconsciously, so when people smile with just their mouth, if they don’t have wrinkles on the side of their eyes, it’s not genuine.”
Scott said there are ways to emulate a Duchenne smile to make people feel comfortable with you and make you appear more confident.
“A glint in the eye, which is when your eyebrows rise between half and three-quarters of a centimeter, if you combine that with your smile and the wrinkles in your eyes, then subconsciously people think: ‘You’re not a threat to yourself.’ ‘I know you,’ he explained.
“People will have that element of feeling a little more comfortable because, out of reciprocity, they will smile back at you with the same smile that you are giving them too.”
Finally, Scott said that positivity can go a long way in increasing someone’s attraction to you.
‘Don’t underestimate the importance of positivity. “People will remember you for how you made them feel,” he said.
“The emotion you have and the authenticity with your communication is as important or more important than a designer shirt and that pair of jeans that you think are going to make a good impression.”
