She was the queen with a huge inferiority complex.
Empress of all she knew, adored by millions around the world, Queen Mary was forced to hide her insecurities (and there were many) behind a stiff, formal demeanor and a lavishly over-the-top style of dress.
But inside she trembled. She was afraid of her husband, King George V, and ashamed of her mother, the Duchess of Teck.
She felt insufficiently royal and cowered before her “prize-winning bitch” of a sister-in-law.
Mary never showed joy in case people heard her “vulgar” laughter.
Although she was engaged to two future kings (George V’s elder brother Eddie, Duke of Clarence, proposed first), she was forced to remain silent about the only man she truly loved.
She hated Balmoral and disliked its children, including the future Edward VIII and George VI.
In turn, she was hated by her granddaughter, Princess Margaret, who liked to point out how unroyal Mary was before she became queen.
She was a queen with a gigantic inferiority complex. Empress for all time, adored by millions around the world, Queen Mary was forced to hide her insecurities (and there were many) behind a stiff, formal demeanor and a lavishly over-the-top style of dress, writes CHRISTOPHER WILSON. Above: Mary shortly before her marriage to King George V
George V’s elder brother Eddie, Duke of Clarence, first proposed to her, but died at the age of 28. Above: Mary and Eddie together
Cold, selfish, boring and lonely, Queen Mary devoted her life to duty, never revealing the feeling of turmoil that she felt – as others saw it – at having married someone of a higher position than her own.
He was born in London in 1867 and had royal blood: his mother was the granddaughter of King George III.
But his father, Francis, Duke of Teck, was simply an Austrian-born nobleman, of no great distinction and, worse still, without money.
The Duke lived off his wife’s royal allowance, but the couple were spendthrifts and at one point had to escape their creditors by hiding in France for a few years.
Upon her return, Mary’s mother, Princess Mary Adelaide, became notorious for her fatness, brash behavior, and chronic lateness.
Their daughter, whom they called May, cringed at her parents’ boisterous and often ill-tempered behavior and felt humiliated by their forced exile.
And so she was surprised and eternally grateful to have been chosen from a pool of would-be wives to become the bride of the Duke of Clarence, a man of diverse tastes, including drink and other men.
The choice was not to the liking of the entire royal family, including her father-in-law, the future King Edward VII, who “paced up and down” upon learning of the engagement.
Lady Juliet Duff recalled that May “was frightened and subdued by” Edward VII.
‘She was very conscious of not being royal enough by birth and once said, “Isn’t that very kind of you?” when someone mentioned that Emperor Wilhelm of Germany was coming to lunch. Her lady-in-waiting told her off for that.’
Princess Mary of Teck and the future King George V on their wedding day in 1891
The Duke and Duchess of Teck were terrible spenders and at one point had to go into hiding in France to escape their creditors. Above: The couple with their daughter Mary
The Queen did not want her children, including the future Edward VIII and George VI. Above: Mary with her husband and son, the future King Edward VIII
King George V with his parrot Charlotte, who would jump on the bacon and eggs at breakfast while the King discussed matters of state with her and not the Queen.
Mary’s biographer James Pope-Hennessy adds that other royals often made fun of her dress.
But while it is true that she adorned herself profusely with diamonds and pearls, as if she had stepped out of a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta, people liked her that way.
In a world where half the globe was still painted pink on maps, indicating the vast extent of the British Empire, Queen Mary cut an imposing figure with her tall, corset-clad, headdress-clad, silk-clad presence, even if, as Lady Juliet said, she did look a bit like Liberace.
She moved slowly and gracefully, a remote figure who somehow contributed to the mystery of the monarchy, and her king was grateful for it.
But did he love her? George is said to have had his eye on another girl until his brother Eddie died at the age of 28 and he suddenly found himself king in waiting.
The way these things were arranged in royal circles, it was decided that May would be a more suitable bride than his own choice, and George obediently agreed to the plan.
“My husband was not in love with me when we were married,” May confessed to her friend Margaret Wyndham, “but he fell in love with me later.”
Only to a certain extent. The person George loved most, in a non-romantic way, was his younger sister, Princess Victoria, the spinster daughter of Edward VII and Queen Alexandra.
They talked at length on the phone every day, and at weekends Mary had to endure the long drive to Iver in Buckinghamshire, where Victoria lived, and sit and listen while brother and sister lingered for long periods of time over lunch, chatting as if they had not spoken for weeks.
Victoria was a snob about Maria’s lineage.
According to the Duke of Windsor (the former King Edward VIII), Princess Victoria was “a shrew of the first order” when it came to her sister-in-law.
Mary’s daughter-in-law Elizabeth, the future Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother, kept her distance and as a result was widely disliked by her
She particularly hated Princess Margaret, and the feeling was mutual.
“Margaret couldn’t stand her. She used to say that her grandmother was jealous of her because, being the daughter of a king, she was more royal than May, who had simply married one,” wrote Margaret’s biographer Tim Heald.
It didn’t help that Mary made it clear that she thought Margaret was “spoiled” and excessively short (she barely stood more than 5’10”) – Margaret never forgave her for that.
It was clear that Maria was not used to having close family relationships.
According to the Duke of Windsor, his mother and father had a strained marriage: “My father had a terrible temper. He was terribly rude to my mother.
“I have often seen her leave the table because he was so rude to her, and all the children followed her when she left, not when the staff was present, of course.”
And at breakfast, Mary had to play second fiddle to the King’s parrot, Charlotte, who paced among the bacon, eggs and jam on the table while His Majesty discussed matters of state with her, not his queen.
And according to the equerry Lord Claud Hamilton, “The king and queen were terrible parents, the most terrible parents. She really didn’t care about the children at all.”
That just added to Mary’s burden of unspoken unhappiness because she viewed being Queen as a job, and that job was to serve and support the king, there was no time to worry about secondary matters like raising children.
“She put the Throne above everything else,” said her friend Margaret Wyndham.
Queen Mary particularly hated Princess Margaret, and the feeling was mutual. Above: Mary with Margaret and King George on their way to Balmoral, 1930s
Queen Mary was said to have hated Balmoral. Above: Mary at a garden party at Balmoral in September 1927
In pursuit of this sense of duty, she even put aside her love for a young officer of the guard: Arthur, the fifth Viscount Hood.
“She had been truly in love, the only time in her life,” wrote biographer James Pope Hennessy.
According to Margaret Wyndham, Mary had then “exhausted her capacity for love – for, though she was in love as she could be, he was someone she could not marry – for Arthur was only a viscount, not a duke or a prince.
But May of Teck served her king and country with devotion, despite her doubts and flaws.
She was queen consort from 1910 until her husband’s death in 1936, and then continued her duties as a symbol of the World War I generation until her death at the age of 85 in 1953.
Tall, austere and alarmingly regal to the very end, Queen Mary may have felt unworthy inside, but she rose to the task and sacrificed much personal happiness along the way to be able to do so.