- Jack talks about his suicide attempt
- Star says it was scariest day of her life
- If you have any problems with this story, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14
Australian swimmer Shayna Jack has spoken out about her crippling mental health struggles during the fight to clear her name after testing positive for a banned substance four years ago.
The World Championships and Commonwealth Games medalist was one of the rising stars of the pool until her world came crashing down in 2019.
Jack, 24, tested positive for Ligandrol, a banned muscle builder, leaving her swimming career and Tokyo Olympics hopes in tatters.
She has now revealed the heartbreaking mental toll it took on her and how it pushed her to attempt suicide.
“I was home alone, I had my dogs there, my partner was at work – and I was done,” Jack wrote in a message. News Corp. article.
Swimming star Shayna Jack bravely opened up about her darkest moments
Jack says she went into a spiral of trauma after her disconcerting drug test result
“I was done with the process. I was done with life.
“And boy, did that scare me.
“Luckily my partner came home and was able to see exactly what was happening.
“I think it was the scariest day of my life and also my partner’s life.”
Jack revealed the confusing test result sent her into “a spiral of trauma” and felt like she didn’t know how to deal with it.
The freestyle star says she was trapped in her emotions as she fought to clear her name.
“When my partner came home and found me in the kitchen that fateful day, it was a turning point,” Jack said.
“I felt like I was a burden to others and it was better not to be there.
Jack says she felt like a burden to those around her and that she was done with life.
She is grateful that her partner came home and was able to stop her from going through with it.
Jack swims again and encourages others to reach out if they need help.
“Having to see people suffering and believing that I was the reason, made me suffer even more.
“But I’m not giving up.
“I know it’s so hard for people to recognize that in their lowest moments – and I’m so grateful that I did.”
Jack began seeing a psychiatrist and says it was “the best things she ever did” because they helped her understand why she felt the way she did.
She was found to have reactive depression – and now she understood why she cried every day.
Jack was allowed to return to the sport in 2021 after a two-year ban and a costly legal battle.
She says she now swims for the people who helped her in her darkest times and encourages others to seek help when they need it.
“There’s no shame in asking questions or asking for help,” she says.
“I wouldn’t be here without other people. I couldn’t have done it alone.
If you have any problems with this story, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14