Home Health DR MAX PEMBERTON: I have seen the real impact that infidelity has on children and it breaks my heart.

DR MAX PEMBERTON: I have seen the real impact that infidelity has on children and it breaks my heart.

by Alexander
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Footballer Kyle Walker and his wife Annie Kilner recently welcomed their fourth child together. But Kyle had another child last year with Lauryn Goodman, his on-again, off-again girlfriend.

Annie Kilner just had a baby with her husband, Manchester City’s Kyle Walker. They have three other children, Roman, 11, Riaan, seven, and Reign, five. But thanks to Kyle’s behavior, there’s a chance it won’t be the happy family you imagine.

Annie discovered in December, while she was pregnant, that Kyle had fathered a second child with Instagram influencer Lauryn Goodman. Kyle has been living in a rented house away from the family home since January, although he and Annie have continued to co-parent.

So, with the newcomer (another boy), a total of six boys are now caught up in this.

While I have great sympathy for Annie, who seems to be dealing with the situation admirably and doing her best to keep things together for her children, I have limited patience for romantic deceptions.

At the risk of sounding old-fashioned in this self-centered era of the “me generation,” there are situations in which people should put aside their own carnal desires and apparent emotional needs to ensure that their children have emotional stability at home. I really hope Annie and Kyle work things out and move on for their kids.

Footballer Kyle Walker and his wife Annie Kilner recently welcomed their fourth child together. But Kyle had another child last year with Lauryn Goodman, his on-again, off-again girlfriend.

Instagram influencer Lauryn Goodman on a day with her young daughter

Instagram influencer Lauryn Goodman on a day with her young daughter

Research shows that any instability a child experiences in an unstable home, whether as a result of infidelity or otherwise, triples their risk of developing emotional problems. I don’t disagree so much with breaking marriage vows (this depends on people’s own conscience) but with the risk that parents take with the well-being of their children. Do what you want, have sex with whoever you choose. If you choose to cheat, it is your choice and when things fall apart, you will have to deal with it. But when there are children involved, I am much less liberal.

There’s no easy way to sugarcoat this pill: any infidelity puts your own libido above what’s best for your children. Over the last 20 years covering mental health in the emergency room and working in child psychiatry, I have seen many children and adolescents with emotional and behavioral problems, with unexplained physical illnesses, eating disorders and self-harm that are manifestations of emotional distress. These children bear the brunt of the emotional consequences of affairs, failed marriages, messy divorces, and warring parents.

Those are the worst cases, and not all children who experience a parental breakup will necessarily be hurt in this way. But talk to any teacher and they’ll tell you about the insidious, low-level damage often caused by warring parents that never makes it to the doctor’s waiting room.

As a psychiatrist, I am tired of hearing parents tell me, “I would do anything for my children” after they have had an affair and caused the breakdown of their marriage. Yes, ‘anything’ except keeping your underwear on, which was actually one of the things your kids needed you to do.

It makes my blood boil that couples who care so much about their children that they buy them the latest gadgets and sneakers, feed them only the best organic vegetables, and send them to extra classes, don’t understand that none of this matters at all in home life. It is not stable.

Research has repeatedly shown that the only thing a child needs to thrive is stability. No matter what the makeup of the family or its material possessions, children have an amazing ability to cope with all kinds of things, as long as the adults in their lives remain constant and consistent.

It’s that easy, but people often seem to find it very difficult to understand.

So deeply rooted in society is the belief that everyone has the right to do what they want in pursuit of their own happiness, that no one dares to tell parents to control themselves and stop being so selfish; Think before jumping into bed with someone else. But for all of you considering infidelity: face it: having an affair is reckless, selfish, and cruel.

You are playing Russian roulette with your children’s well-being.

Maybe you’ll get your way. Maybe they won’t catch you.

If you do, maybe you will be forgiven and everything will be forgotten.

And even if it ends badly, maybe your children will somehow emerge unscathed.

Maybe. But surely this is a ridiculous bet? Is a little extramarital sex really that important?

Don’t drug dementia patients!

1713751943 960 DR MAX PEMBERTON I have seen the real impact that

Giving powerful antipsychotic drugs to dementia patients may be more dangerous than previously thought, according to a major study. Taking the drugs for three months increased the risk of heart attack or heart failure by more than a quarter and doubled the risk of pneumonia.

This medication helps control the most disturbing symptoms of the condition. But it is often used to alleviate the effort (and cost) of caring for patients. Senior psychiatry beds, skilled nurses, and well-trained caregivers are expensive. Doctors don’t prescribe antipsychotic medications because they want to; They do it because they have to. The alternative is too expensive, so it is not available.

Yes, it’s terrible, but what do you do if there are no properly trained staff to care for a disturbed, angry or scared patient?

Celebrity chef Gregg Wallace spoke about our unhealthy lifestyles last week: “Sitting on sofas and eating really unhealthy snacks seems to be almost an addiction, a British pastime that needs to be addressed.”

I agree. How many of us sit in front of the TV at the end of the day and eat the cookies? That’s why I’m a supporter of conscious eating. It allows us to think about what we eat.

When I worked in an eating disorder service we recommended it to patients with overeating problems. Many said that after consciously thinking about what they put in their mouths and taking the time to enjoy it, they did not need to continue eating. A useful antidote to mindless chewing.

Cash is disappearing. Electronic payments are everywhere. But research suggests that cash can help you budget, as paying with it causes 20 percent more “psychological pain.” It’s easier to track money in your wallet than through your bank’s app.

Dr. Max prescribes… Couch at 5k

1713751944 562 DR MAX PEMBERTON I have seen the real impact that

If this weekend’s London Marathon inspired you but you’re not sure where to start, try the NHS Couch To 5k app. People often make the mistake of overdoing it when they start running, risking injury. But this program is designed for novice runners and helps you rack up up to 5K in nine weeks. Why not give it the green light?

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