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Question: Is there anything I can do about my weakened libido? My husband and I have been married for 25 years and have never had any problems in that area.
However, over the past six months, my interest in intimacy has waned. I thought it might be related to menopause, but I’ve been taking HRT for a few years.
I’ve been doing light exercise to see if it helps. Is there anything else I can do?
Problems with libido can come and go at any age, and stress, boredom or familiarity play a role, says Dr Clare Bailey.
Answer: I’m sorry to hear that you are having problems with your libido. Unfortunately, this is very common and there are a number of reasons why sexual desire may decrease as we age, from a decline in estrogen (which causes physical symptoms such as vaginal dryness) to concerns about body image. If your main problem is dryness, over-the-counter lubricants and moisturizers can help.
Problems with libido can come and go at any age, and stress, boredom or familiarity play a role. It’s great that you are being proactive. Very well done to start exercising regularly. Try to include strength training as well. Studies show that exercise can increase sexual arousal and satisfaction. It can also improve mood and confidence. Pelvic floor exercises also improve satisfaction.
As for other non-medical solutions to a weakened sex life, it’s worth considering the impact of diet. We know that eating a Mediterranean-style diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins and whole grains not only benefits your mental health and sleep, but also helps keep your sex drive in shape. In one study, women who followed this diet scored higher on desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm, and satisfaction than women who did not.
There are a number of reasons why sexual desire may decline as we age, from a decline in estrogen (which causes physical symptoms such as vaginal dryness) to concerns about body image.
Phytoestrogens, found in foods such as flax seeds, sesame seeds, and chickpeas, act similarly to the female sex hormone estrogen. Eating these foods can help with menopause symptoms. Foods rich in zinc, such as oysters, nuts, and seeds, may also have positive effects.
And it’s not just women whose sex life declines with age. If her husband needs a little pick-me-up, then there are certain items worth adding to her diet. Beets, for example, have long been considered an aphrodisiac. In fact, it works a bit like Viagra. It is high in nitrates, which the body converts into nitric acid, which expands blood vessels and improves blood flow to organs, including sexual organs.
And you might be interested to know that foods rich in omega-3 polyunsaturated fatty acids, such as salmon, anchovies, tuna, and mussels, can increase testosterone levels in men.
If you’re feeling adventurous, add some fermented foods, like kimchi, to your diet. Fermented foods are full of probiotics, vitamins and minerals and have been shown to help reduce stress and anxiety, perhaps due to the impact on the gut microbiome. Less stress and anxiety equals a more fulfilling sex life.
Vitamin D levels may be low this time of year, so consider taking supplements as they can also improve your mood and well-being.
But perhaps one of the best things you can do to improve your sex life is to talk to your partner about what you like and don’t like or simply try different things. Couples who can talk openly with each other are likely to have a closer, more trusting relationship. Maybe all you need is a little change to put a little excitement back into your sex life.
If things don’t improve, it may be worth talking to your doctor about your decreased libido at your next HRT check.