Three years ago, American rap duo Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion released their single WAP. It became a huge global hit, racking up tens of millions of downloads and earning the duo the flattering endorsement of the entire music industry.
The video was a sensation: a bold and unapologetic representation of the song’s central theme – Wap stands for Wet-Ass Pussy.
The idea was – and here I must apologize to readers as there is no tricky way to explain this or the themes to follow – that the two ladies were, quite literally, dripping with excitement at the idea of spend some time alone with a gentleman.
There were tigers, there were snakes, there were fountains gushing from multiple orifices, there was lots of licking of inanimate objects and, inexplicably, Kylie Jenner in a leopard print leotard.
To say it was rude is an understatement. Some sample lyrics (look away now if you’re easily shocked, but honestly, who wouldn’t be by this kind of language?): “That pussy is wet, come dive”; “Make it cream, make me scream”; “I want to choke, I want to choke”; “Extra big and extra hard.” And so on. Believe me, it’s the classiest thing.
Three years ago, American rap duo Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion released their single WAP. The video (pictured above) was a sensation: a bold, no-holds-barred representation of the song’s central theme – Wap stands for Wet-Ass Pussy.
It was, for all intents and purposes, a porn film dressed up as a dance video, with the action described in the lyrics. And the extraordinary thing is that no one seemed to care. (Well, it bothered me, but everyone told me to stop being such a prude.)
Rather, Stallion and Cardi B were celebrated in the media and music press for their “sex-positive” message and for the way their “celebration” of female sexuality “empowered” other women.
I guess it depends on what you mean by “empowerment”.
Is asking to be choked during sexual activity “empowerment”? Is “Looking for a beats” (another lyric) empowering? Is wiggling your butt up and down in front of a camera “stimulating”? Maybe I missed that memo.
Regardless, the highlight of their success was a performance at the Grammys in which they simulated sex on a giant bed.
To be fair, this sparked a few complaints – which Cardi B said amounted to “harassment.” Go figure. But otherwise, Wap was a huge success, earning them both a fortune.
It is therefore not surprising that they did it again.
Last Friday, the duo released their new collaboration, Bongos. The video has already racked up 10 million views and, aside from the absence of Jenner in a thong, it’s more of the same: endless butt shots, crotch grabs and general horse riding. random inanimate objects – a refrigerator, upholstery, whatever. looks like some sort of children’s playground equipment, with matching lounge chairs.
The words don’t do anything either. “Pussy tight like a nun”; “Better beat that shit like a drum.”
And so on.
The video, which lasts less than three minutes, had a budget of $2 million. On social media, the couple shared various behind-the-scenes clips, including one of Cardi B on set with what appears to be her baby, Wave.
Even fellow pop star Lizzo got in on the act, posting a video of her own stunning bum swaying to the tune on Instagram.
At this point, you might well ask: What does any of this matter and, more to the point, why is Sarah filling my head with visions of Lizzo’s nearly naked behind?
I will tell you why. Because that’s how we teach the next generation of young women (and men) how to behave – and tell them that it’s completely normal.
Last Friday, the duo released their new collaboration, Bongos (a still from the video above). The video has already accumulated 10 million views
Pop music has always been subversive – God knows, that’s pretty much its goal. And gender has always played a big role in this subversion.
But this is not about adolescent passions or the natural rebellion of youth: it is pornography, pure and simple.
Not just any old porn: a terrible genre, disguised as harmless, colorful, fashionable, fun pop – and given to impressionable young people as a desirable aesthetic.
It’s not only revolting and tastes terrible, it’s incredibly toxic. Is it any wonder that more and more girls and young women report being choked during sex, or are expected to look and behave as if they had just get off an X-rated film set?
Or being told that they really want it, even if they don’t? Or being caught and assaulted in public? Or feeling pressured to do things out of fear of being labeled cold or – heaven forbid – “powerless.” Is it any wonder it’s prime time?
Make fun if you want, call me a jealous, dried-up old Karen.
But empowerment, emancipation and feminism are not about turning a bunch of pornographic clichés into entertainment and then shaming anyone who objects.
It’s about having the freedom and confidence to determine your own choices, without being forced to conform to those of others.
In this case, a powerful global pop industry that makes millions telling young women they’re freaks because they don’t act like porn stars.
That it’s two women selling this lie is just icing on the rotten cake.
As someone who is way too sedentary at work, I’m constantly looking for ways to stop my Apple Watch from nagging me to be more active.
I found a new trick. Once or twice a day, I stop what I’m doing, put a song on my headphones – usually Taylor Swift or something that anyone under 40 would find excruciatingly embarrassing – then launch into a vigorous session of dance.
This not only clears the cobwebs, but it also soothes the Nazi on my wrist and gets the blood flowing – while, of course, providing excellent entertainment value for the neighbors.
My dog law has real bite
Suella Braverman has a duty to tackle the shocking rise in dog attacks. But the idea of banning certain breeds – as many have suggested following this horrific attack on an 11-year-old in Birmingham by an “XL Bully” – is wrong.
First, it’s impractical: is the government planning to round up and euthanize all XL Bullies, even the most harmless ones?
Second, if you ban one breed, another will take its place. They are status dogs, bought by owners who don’t know how to handle them or worse, mistreat them.
And there’s nothing more dangerous than a bullied dog, especially if it has the strength and instincts of an XL Bully.
Suella Braverman has a duty to tackle the shocking rise in dog attacks. But the idea of banning certain breeds – as many have suggested in the wake of this horrific attack on an 11-year-old in Birmingham by an ‘XL Bully’ – is wrong.
First, it’s impractical: is the government planning to round up and euthanize all XL Bullies, even the most harmless ones? Second, if you ban one breed, another will take its place. They are status dogs, bought by owners who can’t handle them or worse, mistreat them (image of an XL bully)
The responsible thing is to make a list of “restricted” breeds and require anyone who wants to a) buy a dog license and b) take a handler course. Do a retrospective. If you get caught without it, it’s a hefty fine or ban.
This way, the police could confiscate animals without a license and hold irresponsible owners accountable.
In the long term, this would dissuade people from purchasing them.
YouTuber “CyclingMikey” (real name Michael Van Erp, 50), who works in London tracking drivers with their phones, has a long list of celebrity scalps, including Frank Lampard and Guy Ritchie.
But as someone who (regularly) cycles and (occasionally) drives in London, I have to admit that it’s increasingly other cyclists who seem to be making the most of the rules.
If I had the time and energy, I would put a camera to my head and prove it. But like most sane people, I’m not that petty.
I love the Antiques Roadshow. So it’s infuriating that my lovely Sunday evening balm has been infected by the culture wars. Sunday’s episode featured two women who brought a dress and a letter given to their grandfather by Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie.
After assessing the items, expert Ronnie Archer-Morgan asked them: “If there is a call for these things to be repatriated, would you be happy to do that?” » Both men nodded dutifully – what else could they do? But the question was completely inappropriate. The items were a gift – why the hell should they give them away?
This is Antiques Roadshow, not Antiques Wokeshow.