Far from signalling any sort of rapprochement with his estranged family, Prince Harry’s visit to the UK last week (to attend a memorial service for his aunt Jane’s late husband, Lord Fellowes) appears to have only widened the rift.
Not only did he and his brother, Prince William, not exchange a single word in church, but perhaps more tellingly, it has now emerged that he stayed with his uncle, Charles Spencer, at the family’s stately home, Althorp, in Northamptonshire.
You might well ask, why? should not Is Prince Harry staying with his uncle? After all, his mother is buried in Althorp, meaning a part of him will always call it home.
True enough, but the way the information has come to light (via an American publication with established ties to the Sussexes) is certainly intriguing.
Prince Harry could easily have been accommodated in one of the royal residences for this visit. The king has made it clear that his door will always be open to his youngest son.
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex
But Harry not only decided not to do so (in fact, he did not see his father at all on this trip, despite the fact that the King is still undergoing treatment for cancer), but he also decided to stay with Earl Spencer.
It is fair to say that there is not a good relationship between the monarch and the earl. Anyone who remembers Earl Spencer’s brilliant speech at Princess Diana’s funeral in 1997 knows this.
He has always blamed the king – and by extension the royal family – for his sister’s agonies, and he is not entirely wrong. In some ways, Charles treated Princess Diana badly; in others, however, she gave as well as she received.
However, Harry clearly takes a more biased view, and has said as much in his various on-screen and press attacks on his father. Indeed, many of the duke’s difficulties, especially in recent years, arguably stem from what he sees as his father’s ultimate betrayal of his mother.
Not only does he need someone to blame for his loss, he also needs someone to punish.
At first, it was just his father and, privately, Queen Camilla. But now Prince William is also being punished (along with Kate) for his decision to put duty before everything else.
Althorp in Northamptonshire, where Princess Diana is buried and where Prince Harry stayed during his trip to the UK last week
Like so many people who carry deep pain inside, Prince Harry knows how to hurt. The past few years have been a long, drawn-out exercise in lashing out at those he believes have hurt him.
Even his late grandmother, Elizabeth, was not exempt from his bitterness. It made his final years on this earth very difficult indeed.
The more William leans toward duty, the more Prince Harry leans the other way, allying himself with his mother’s bloodline, the House of Spencer.
He’s always looked like that side of the family, with that red hair so reminiscent of his uncle’s; now he’s confirming where his loyalties lie.
This snub to his father and brother sends a clear and unequivocal message: Prince Harry is not offering any kind of olive branch, but is instead doubling down on his efforts.
No one knows exactly what the Earl thinks about it. He himself has been through a great deal of emotional turmoil recently, with the publication of his memoir, A Very Private School, in which he wrote about the relentless abuse, sexual and physical, he suffered as a child at Maidwell Hall school.
He has said that the process of reliving these horrors caused him to have a “nervous breakdown” and he recently separated from his third wife. Does he really need to be involved in all this?
Charles Spencer with Prince Harry in 2021
Probably not, but it may be very hard to resist, given the history between the two families. There is no doubt that the Spencers have always considered the upstart Windsors somewhat inferior in aristocratic terms.
I wouldn’t be surprised if Prince Harry, somewhat lost in California and with increasingly limited career options, didn’t slowly begin to forge a stronger bond with his mother’s family, with whom he has a much more direct relationship.
The discerning Duchess of Sussex could also be persuaded of the virtues of the Althorp Estate, which boasts all the grandeur and opulence of a royal residence, but with none of the obligations, public exposure or restrictions.
There are certainly some excellent jam-making facilities in the servants’ kitchens, and one imagines endless quirky photo opportunities on Princess Diana’s island to delight people back home.
If the Sussexes wanted Archie and Lilibet, now aged five and three, to go to school in the UK, Althorp would not be a bad base for them. The children would no doubt be very happy there, frolicking in the same grounds as young Diana, running around the same marble corridors.
We’ll see. But if Harry really wants to spend more time in the UK without having to compromise or be humble, Uncle Charles might have the answer.
Now that’s an idea.
