For seventy years, no public figure had a greater capacity for patience, nor had that tolerance been tested more frequently. Yet despite many provocations (and considerable temptations), the late Queen Elizabeth overcame them all with a firm omertà.
It served her well during her long and successful reign, so much so that by the end of her life we knew as little about what the queen thought about things as we did when she came to the throne.
Her opinions on party politics, on celebrities, on the rich and famous she met over the decades, were all off limits to us, her subjects. But every now and then a fly in the ointment would emerge and the Queen’s opinion would emerge from behind that regal reticence.
And when she did, it was usually accompanied by fireworks. Her anger, for example, when David Cameron not once but twice breached official protocol by revealing how he had asked her to intervene in the Scottish referendum and then revealing how she had “purred down the line” when he broke the news to her that she had missed the vote to break up the Union.
She also hinted that she did not like Tony Blair revealing his private encounters with her and accused him of displaying “a certain haughtiness”.
And there was royal outrage at his claim that Princess Anne could be “incredibly rude”.
But there was one rule she adhered to with particular firmness: no visiting head of state, however horrible, would ever hear a word of criticism from her lips. Of course, from time to time things did leak out.
Take, for example, the appalling behaviour of Chinese President Xi’s advisers, who placed ridiculous demands on Buckingham Palace staff, including insisting that the science of feng shui (said to be able to optimise the flow of energy in a room) be used when preparing the Chinese leader’s accommodation.
What was it about Trump that might have caused the Queen to abandon her diplomatic niceties?
US President Donald Trump, Queen Elizabeth II and Melania Trump at Buckingham Palace
Donald Trump and the Queen at Windsor Castle in July 2018
He let slip a remark, and it was picked up by the television microphone, that the Chinese had been “very rude” to our ambassador. This caused a storm, with Chinese state media lashing out at the “reckless and barbaric gossipmongers” in the British media.
The then Foreign Secretary, Philip Hammond, was forced to offer a humble apology.
That is why the comments published in Craig Brown’s new book about Donald Trump, the then president of the United States (our closest and most important ally) seem so out of place.
What was it about Trump that could have caused the Queen to abandon the diplomatic niceties for which she was so famous? She did not leave the Belgian Suite at the Palace with the same care as other visiting political leaders, nor did she pull out a laptop during tea at Windsor Castle, as the Chinese delegation infamously did.
The memory of the day Trump arrived at the castle and inspected the Queen’s guard certainly lingers in his mind. The president was clearly in awe of his hostess despite her enormous stature.
Yet within weeks of that brief visit, the Queen, according to Craig Brown, was concerned enough not only to complain about Trump but also to judge his marriage.
Brown quotes a source as saying that she found the 45th US president rude because of the way he looked over his shoulder, as if searching for someone more interesting.
It seems extraordinary that she would say that even to a very close friend.
Then there is the shocking comment she is said to have made about the state of the president’s marriage, speculating that Mrs Trump “must have some sort of arrangement” or else why would she have stayed married?
What makes these comments so incredible is that she said them herself in the first place. We’re used to Prince Harry expressing his innermost thoughts, but not the late Queen. Of course, it should be noted that the Queen did not expect these opinions to come to light.
Even a cursory acquaintance with his life would show that such an intervention is highly unusual, indeed, virtually unheard of. One wonders what made Trump make a remark that he never made about any of the other 13 sitting American presidents he has met in his lifetime.
I’ve heard other members of the Royal Family make a similar comment about the bores they know who constantly scan the room for someone more interesting to talk to, but never the Queen.
On the other hand, he always enjoyed such meetings, whether at the White House or here in Britain, with the leader of the free world. Some of them he liked: President Reagan, with whom he travelled, and President Roosevelt, who was so close to his father, King George VI, that he made him godfather to Prince Michael of Kent.
It is also true that the Queen is always well informed about the visits of heads of state, which includes being aware of gossip about their private lives.
Which makes her decision to abandon decades of discretion to express her views on Trump so strange.
She will surely respond. In her usual modesty, she boasted of her meeting, saying that “there are those who say they have never seen the Queen have a better time, a more lively time.”
Maybe you have a different opinion on this now.