a forensico psychiatrist has revealed five ways having ADHD can affect romantic relationships.
Dr. Sohom Das, who also runs YouTube channel A Psych for Sore Minds, where she shares content about mental health conditions, described in a recent clip how some of the symptoms of the condition can cause friction between the couple.
The London doctor called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) “difficult (…) to manage for people who suffer from it,” and suggested that it is like trying to “herd cats,” when those cats are your thoughts. .
Before listing five reasons why having this condition can affect relationships, he said: “When it comes to relationships, it can really wreak havoc.”
Here, FEMAIL explores the ways ADHD may be affecting your love life, according to the expert.
Dr Sohom Das (pictured) is a forensic psychiatrist and content creator from London. His YouTube channel is called A Psych for Sore Minds.
1. People with ADHD can be chronically late
According to Dr. Das: ‘The number one method for ADHD to damage a romantic relationship is annoying antics, always late and awkward.
‘Imagine you’re planning a romantic dinner at a fancy restaurant for your anniversary… only for your partner to arrive late. He’s still buttoning his shirt and apologizing profusely.
Furthermore, Dr. Das stated, “ADHD includes inattention.” So she still has some wax on her lips and some toothpaste in her hair…
“Therefore, having a short attention span and being easily distracted means that you may not be able to accomplish tasks, especially if you find them tedious or time-consuming.
“Therefore, people with ADHD may have difficulty prioritizing tasks, meeting deadlines, or making appointments, such as dates at fancy restaurants.”
The problem with this is that having ADHD can also affect the affected person’s ability “to be that reliable and trustworthy individual, which is necessary for a healthy relationship,” and this can “lead to feelings of frustration and resentment on the part of the person.” of their partners”.
Dr. Das summed it up as “like trying to synchronize two different clocks that operate in different time zones.”
2. People with ADHD may focus too much on the “wrong” thing.
If someone has ADHD, some of the symptoms can cause major relationship problems, according to Dr. Sohom Das (file image)
The psychiatrist described hyperconcentration, which is a facet of the disease, as a “frightful and horrible mischief.”
‘(Someone with) ADHD may focus too much on a particular task or interest. But the problem is that it excludes everything else and this can lead to difficult situations in relationships,” he said.
‘For example, you are driving (to) a family picnic. Your girlfriend is in the front seat and you want to talk about your future together. Maybe you’ll even start talking about moving in together next year.
“Maybe you’re even considering a pre-engagement engagement ring, and you can see her squirm with excitement out of the corner of your eye, then you look over and see that she just scored over 500 points (in a game) on her phone “.
He continued: ‘So, ADHD involves not being able to concentrate on tasks, but conversely, it also involves being hyperfocused on a particular task, and this happens accidentally, and being oblivious to your surroundings. (And) this can contribute to communication breakdowns, obviously.
‘Therefore, difficulty maintaining concentration can lead not only to miscommunication, but also to misunderstandings. Therefore, it can also lead to feelings that the partner is being neglected, so they may feel that they are frequently overlooked due to the partner’s inability to stay focused.’
Dr. Das explained that “frequent lapses in attention can be frustrating for the couple, causing some resentment and, ultimately, some tension.”
3. Having ADHD can make a person impulsive
“The (third way) ADHD can damage a relationship is (through) incredibly embarrassing, inept, and impulsive incidents,” Dr. Das said in the video.
“Having ADHD makes it difficult to control impulses, which can sometimes lead to embarrassing situations in relationships.”
He continued: ‘ADHD includes impulsivity, which is acting without thinking and without considering the consequences of your actions.
“It’s not a big deal if it only affects you, but it’s possibly more important if it affects you and your partner too.”
4. People with ADHD may have “erratic emotional outbursts”
The forensic psychiatrist explained the fourth way he sees ADHD as detrimental to romantic relationships: what he describes as “extremely erratic emotional outbursts.”
He explained: ‘ADHD can make it difficult to regulate emotions, causing sudden mood swings and outbursts. So, one moment your partner is laughing hysterically and the next they’re sulking in the corner.
“That makes it difficult to maintain stable and consistent emotions. This can lead to feelings of insecurity and uncertainty in their partners, and can be exhausting and confusing for anyone in a relationship.
He added: “People with ADHD can become frustrated or upset easily. This can lead to outbursts. It can lead to arguments, it can create tension and an uncomfortable atmosphere, making it difficult to maintain a positive connection and the partner may feel like it is their fault. ‘
5. People with ADHD can be “notoriously forgetful”
“The fifth and final way that ADHD can damage a romantic relationship is the terrible and frustrating failures of forgetfulness,” she explained, which can lead to forgetting important agreements, which can cause problems.
“People with ADHD have poor working memory,” he explained. ‘They have trouble retaining information in their minds. They have difficulty staying focused.
‘ADHD makes it difficult to concentrate on tasks, causing distractions and lapses in attention. And also, on top of that, it could mean that the victim is feeling overwhelmed with amounts of data, meaning they find it difficult to process and retain information, which is basically forgetfulness.’
Dr. Sohom Das can be found at Twitter, instagramand tiktokas well as YouTube.