Celebrities are just like us, right?
They still have to pay taxes, call their mothers from time to time, do the weekly shopping and, oh, sometimes they cheat on their partners.
Yes, you’d think that having a high profile would make you less likely to give in to temptation (what with being recognizable in public and all), but, in my experience, the rich and famous are some of the worst offenders..
There’s a saying, “With great power comes great responsibility,” but celebrities seem to live by different rules: the more powerful they are, the more reckless they become.
And although it may seem critical, I must confess that I am not an innocent bystander.
Sometimes, in the stillness of the night, I shudder when I think of my own moment of weakness.
Picture this: a ditsy, dreamy 23-year-old Jana, suddenly face to face with her high school crush: a former soap opera star she had idolized as a child. I used to have his Dolly magazine poster on my wall and here I was, talking to him..
It was at a TV awards after-party, the kind that sparkles with free champagne and questionable decisions, also with lots of ‘sniff, sniff’ and bathroom dates. Very Sydney.
Mail+ columnist Jana Hocking talks about her one-night stand with a married Australian soap star, but her story is embarrassed by her friends’ affairs with some household names.
My friends and I had somehow managed to get into TV night and before I knew it, there he was, playing next to me on the dance floor.
Was he married? I didn’t know and, embarrassingly, I didn’t care. Oh, silly, naive twenty-something Jana. How much you had to learn.
Fast forward to the next morning, and there I was, removing my dress from the floor of his hotel room and trying to tiptoe out without waking him.
What had been exciting the night before suddenly seemed like a very bad idea.
Of course, back in my own hotel room with the girls, I pulled out my phone for a quick deep dive into Google. And there it was: a photo of him and his wife, smiling on the red carpet. I felt so stupid.
He, of course, got away with it (well, not exactly, but that’s a story for another time). But it left me wondering: Why do celebrities so recklessly gamble their careers (and marriages) on these fleeting flings with regular people like me?
Thanks to my privileged position as a journalist, I am now privy to a constant stream of scandalous secrets, often involving celebrities.
From time to time, I get messages from women spilling the tea about famous men they’ve hooked up with, men who are almost always in relationships.
You’d think that having a high profile would make you less likely to give in to temptation (what with being recognizable in public and all), but, in my experience, the rich and famous are some of the worst offenders, writes Jana (photo by posada archive by models)
Just this week we saw David Beckham’s ex-lover, Rebecca Loos, give a revealing interview. She lamented: ‘I felt hurt.’ Him making it public was a “fuck you, buddy,” for treating me like that. In a big way. I don’t care how powerful you are or how much money you have, it’s not right.’
Ah, men. Have we not yet learned that a woman scorned is a very dangerous beast?
Naturally, I decided to dig deeper and asked my Instagram followers for their juiciest stories about unfortunate celebrity adventures. Some were full-blown flings, some were one-night stands, but all were very eye-opening.
One story in particular stood out. A friend of mine who travels with some pretty prominent figures in the entertainment industry told me this.
I can personally attest to its truth because, well, I know it. This is what she presented (and note that all had girlfriends)
‘In the past, I had a brief fling with a well-known soap opera star, and let me tell you, it was… unforgettable.
“He was absolutely obsessed with looking in the mirror during the act. The piece de resistance? He had a pretty unique post-climax routine that involved, shall we say, cleaning in a way I’d never seen before.
‘Years later, a friend of mine had a one-night stand with the same guy. She didn’t even realize it was him until he repeated his signature finishing move. Halfway through, he suddenly remembered the story he had told him and could barely retain it.
“Then there was the NRL star who, surprisingly, was a total gentleman: polite, attentive and kind, despite the small problem of having a wife. Refreshing, right?”
And last but not least, the big-name Hollywood actor I briefly dated. He had an infuriating habit of leaving me at the table while he went to the counter to order sandwiches, without even asking me if I wanted anything. Honestly, it’s the little things that can be the real deal breakers.’
(Side note: I love that the snacks were the deciding factor, not the fact that this actor had a partner.)
I asked my Instagram followers what their juiciest stories were about unfortunate celebrity adventures. Some were full-blown flings, others were one-night stands, but all were eye-opening (archive image)
Then there was the woman who found herself in a bind…
‘I had a sugar daddy relationship with a well-known television personality. One night we had a torrid encounter in the bathroom of an establishment in Merivale. Just as we were finishing, security knocked on the door and demanded that we leave.
And who could forget this valuable question I once received for my Saucy Secrets advice column and it fits so well here?
‘I’m a single reality TV contestant and I’ve been hanging out with a married TV star every time she’s in town. We have incredible sexual chemistry. What are the chances that she will leave her husband so we can be together?
Spoiler alert: I finally found out who he was (they always reveal themselves). Let’s say it’s a sex tape I would definitely watch.
For every celebrity who gets away with murder, there are those whose recklessness leaves a trail of heartbreak, scandal and public humiliation.
So perhaps the real lesson here is this: rich or famous, married or single, no one is immune from bad decisions—or the consequences that follow.
And my 23 year old self? You are a silly girl. Never meet your idols, they rarely live up to your ideal fantasy. Sigh.