Home Australia Not just ‘puppy love’! Teenage relationships are actually the most intense of our lives, says Oxford psychologist

Not just ‘puppy love’! Teenage relationships are actually the most intense of our lives, says Oxford psychologist

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From '10 Things I Hate About You' (pictured) to 'To All the Boys I've Loved Before,' teen romances have been the focus of blockbusters for years.
  • Dr Lucy Foulkes says people shouldn’t be ‘flippant’ about school crushes

From “10 Things I Hate About You” to “To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before,” teen romances have been the focus of blockbusters for years.

It is often tempting to trivialize these romances by calling them “puppy love.”

However, an Oxford psychologist now claims we should take teenage relationships more seriously.

Dr Lucy Foulkes says relationships between teenagers in love and the repercussions of a break-up are often underestimated.

She says people shouldn’t take high school crushes and the resulting relationships lightly because for some they are actually the “most intense” times of their lives.

From ’10 Things I Hate About You’ (pictured) to ‘To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before,’ teen romances have been the focus of blockbusters for years.

It's often tempting to trivialize teenage romances, like those portrayed in To All the Boys I've Loved Before, as

It’s often tempting to trivialize teenage romances, like those portrayed in To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, as “puppy love.”

The Oxford University academic psychologist said that for some, the effect of teenage heartbreak is felt for a “long time” and should be taken more seriously.

On why relationships feel so intense, she said: ‘It’s a period of time when we’re still forming our own identity and so a great way to figure out who we are is by looking at the people around us and observing what they say about us and how they treat us.

“And we absorb that into the fabric of who we think we are.

‘So if there’s someone you love and they reject you, that can really become ingrained in your self-concept and how you understand yourself, and that can last a long time.’

The academic psychologist at Oxford University said that for some people, the effect of teenage heartbreak is felt for

The Oxford University academic psychologist said that for some people, the effect of teenage heartbreak is felt for a “long time” and should be taken more seriously. Pictured: The Summer I Turned Pretty

She added: ‘Take teenage love more seriously.

‘It’s often dismissed as puppy love or something, people take it quite lightly.

‘But in reality, it can be the most intense relationship in some people’s lives, in a positive and negative sense.

“And I think it would be great if we respected that a little bit more, both in terms of how much people care and love each other, but also how painful it is when things go wrong.”

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