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Today’s work life is full of ever-evolving challenges and pitfalls. When is it okay to date a coworker? Can you tell your team to return to the office five days a week?
Whether you’re a bewildered Boomer, a confused millennial or a confused Gen Z-er, our brilliant columnist Nicola Horlick can help.
Dear Nicola,
Over the Christmas holidays, I found myself thinking almost obsessively about a colleague. I always thought the guy was quite attractive, but now I realize that I am very attracted to him and would like to start a relationship.
As far as I know he has no attachment: we talk in the kitchen while we make coffee. But the place where I work tends to disapprove of labor relations (there have been problems in the past and a scandal that made the newspapers).
I guess I could continue wishing from afar. Unless you can suggest a way to suggest me a coffee outside the office or a drink to see how it feels and how we could start something. I like my job and I would like to advance to a higher position.
Yours, Victoria.
Dear victory,
I really object to employers trying to prevent colleagues from entering into romantic relationships. We are all human and it is inevitable that there is attraction between coworkers.
Yes, it can be awkward if one or both of you are already in a long-term relationship, but that shouldn’t mean that single people should be prevented from making connections at work. I mentioned before that a YouGov survey conducted in 2020 found that 18 percent of married people met their partner at work.
Of course, just because the man has no attachments doesn’t mean he’s as attracted to you as you are to him. You should definitely go out for coffee or a drink to see if he shares your feelings.
If not, no problem. If you do, I think you should challenge the company that disapproves of office relationships and give it a chance. After all, if you haven’t met a life partner at school or university, work is probably one of the most likely places to meet.
You talk about an office scandal that made the newspapers, but I doubt that two single people falling in love would interest anyone. Most people love happy endings, so let’s hope everything turns out well for you.
Yours, Nicola
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