A mother raising four children between the ages of two and 13 says she refuses to use “baby talk” and will always let them sleep in her room “even if they’re 25.”
Kail Britt, 30, of Tillsonburg, Ontario, Canada, said she didn’t always practice “gentle parenting,” especially after she had her first son Will, now 13, when she was just 17.
But she stopped “following other people’s stories of parenting” and embraced her own style in raising Will, Dallas, nine, Aiyanna, six, and Archie, two.
She said she refuses to use “baby talk” — instead, she treats them like “people.”
She doesn’t force her kids to hug or talk to others and lets them take a day off for a mental health day if they need it.
Kail Britt, 30, from Ontario, has learned not to listen to ‘parenting techniques’ – and says she’ll let her four kids, including Archie, sleep in bed next to her if they want
The stay-at-home mom also keeps a bed in her room for her kids to sleep in if they want and says it will still be there for them when they grow up.
Kail, a content creator and social media marketer, said, “I don’t do baby talk.”
“I talk to them like normal people and talk to them about deeper feelings. I still talk to them at the right age, but I find baby talk a little condescending. I guide them, I don’t control them.
“I used to plan their outfits, but now they wear what they want. I’ve given them mental health days, but they don’t abuse it.
The mother-of-four, who became pregnant with her first son, Will, when she was just 17, says mental health days and talking to a child in an ‘age-appropriate’ way are her best tips
Affirmations: Every night, Kail tells her children that they are strong and kind (Photo: Aiyanna, Kail’s only daughter)
Sweet dreams: The mother of four says she will never force her children to do anything they don’t want to
Kail’s best tips for gentle parenting
- Let kids take mental health days
- Don’t force them to do something they don’t want to do
- Let them sleep together if they want
- Repeat affirmations for children every night
- Let them dress however they want
- Refuse to use “baby talk.”
- Enjoy ‘adult time-outs’
- Don’t use “time-outs” – instead, use “time-ins” to talk about situations
“They can take a day off without feigning a fever — I’ll just check they’re up to date on their work and don’t have a test that day.” By being a gentle parent, I make my children proud of themselves.”
Kail said she didn’t always take a kind or respectful approach to parenting.
She said, “I used to follow other people’s stories about parenting. Now I have been a gentle parent for a few years now. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, but I’m the best I can be.’
Kail says she will always apologize to her children if she feels she is doing something wrong and will allow herself time out if she needs it.
She said, “I will apologize to show that adults make mistakes too. I grew up with time outs where I go to the bathroom to take a rest. I have affirmations there that I will repeat to myself.
“With my kids, we do ‘time-ins,’ so once the emotions have calmed down, we sit down together and talk about what happened.”
Kail will never force her children to do anything they don’t want to.
She said, “I won’t let them cuddle or talk to anyone if they’re uncomfortable.
“I won’t let them go to a family party if they don’t want to.”
Kail will also do affirmations with her children every night.
“I tell them they are strong, beautiful and kind,” she said.
Let them sleep together if they want: The mother of four says that while she takes time for herself, she encourages her children to share her bed if they feel anxious
The tactic has worked, with her kids usually happy to curl up in their own beds
Kail is also happy that her children can sleep with her if they want – and has now set up a separate bed in her bedroom if they want to use it.
“They have the option of co-sleeping,” she said. “But often they like to go to their own bed. The bed will always be available to them – even when they are 25. It’s a safe place.’
Kail also lets her daughter Aiyanna make her own breakfast and lunch in her own Ikea kitchen — and says she loves the independence.
She said, “For a long time I didn’t believe I was a good mother. Now I believe I am.
“But there is always room for improvement. My children are loved and feel safe and know their worth.’