All politicians are liars, but Darth Brandon is in a class of his own.
The Big Guy lived a big lie.
And now, as his peddler son’s gooey partner in the international grift has begun to sing like a canary, it’s harder for President Joe’s weary caretakers to keep cleaning up on the driveway jive.
Yes, it is high time for us to ask: Who is the REAL Joe Biden?
The final stop for Hunter’s pal in jail before the Graybar Hotel was a closed-door meeting with the house watch committee last week.
Devon Archer shouted that Hunty’s dad had called his morally bankrupt kid’s crooks — I mean, business meetings — at least 20 times to chat with potential suckers and discuss the weather.
Archer said Joe’s calls showed sleazy operators from Kyiv to Beijing that Hunter could reach out and touch the old man (eww!) any time of the day or night.
But the Honorable Joseph R. Biden, Jr. promised he never spoke to his son about business. Which give?
Could it be that mumbling Joe isn’t the selfless civil servant, doting dad, and child-munching grandfather that the mainstream media drools over?
President Biden has long cultivated an image of empathy because no matter how much pain you feel, God’s cruel tricks have deprived him of more.
Tragedy first struck in December 1972 when Senator-elect Biden’s wife and granddaughter were killed in a car accident at what should have been one of the happiest times of his life.
All politicians are liars, but Darth Brandon is in a class of his own. The Big Guy lived a big lie.
And now, as his peddler son’s gooey partner (above left, Devon Archer) in the international grift has started singing like a canary, it’s harder for President Joe’s weary caretakers to keep cleaning up on the jive from the aisle.
The fatal accident spared Joe’s sons, the brilliant Beau, who would make his father proud at every turn, and the unfortunate Hunter, who would embarrass his father in equal measure.
In the depths of his pain, he made the image of his ailing and hospitalized son Beau the backdrop for his senatorial swearing-in.
It was the image of a grieving father.
Fast forward a few decades. Hunter, who claims to have drunk his first glass of champagne at age eight, somehow landed a plum job with a Delaware financial services giant. This is the state where his father was a senator. What a coincidence.
It was the start of something beautiful; if you think trading on access is beautiful.
Sweaty goons always gravitate toward each other, so Hunter quickly found a bunch of pals in Archer, Chris Heinz (private plane-loving stepson of John Kerry), and others.
They were a motley bunch of fancy guys, who had connections and plans, but most importantly, access.
They would sneak around DC and around the world cooking up pay rackets to separate the oligarchs and commies from the loot of authoritarianism, while introducing Dear Old Dad to the power-hungry.
Maybe Hunter needed to bolster his bona fides to legitimize appearances, so he joined the Naval Reserve in 2014, only to be quickly fired after dancing with devil’s dandruff. He should sniff out disreputable pursuits elsewhere, and so he did.
Piggybacking with VP Dad on Air Force Two in China to meet dodgy access seekers?
OK of course.
Dinners at Cafe Milano in Georgetown with Ukrainian executives from Hunter’s Burisma?
Yeah, Joe is dead.
In the depths of his pain, he made the image of his ailing and hospitalized son Beau the backdrop for his senatorial swearing-in. (picture above)
Archer said Joe’s calls showed sleazy operators from Kyiv to Beijing that Hunter could reach out and touch the old man (eww!) any time of the day or night. (Above) Mykola Zlochevsky, owner of Burisma
Sweaty morons always gravitate toward each other, so Hunter quickly found a group of pals in Archer (above, right), Chris Heinz (the stepson of private plane-loving John Kerry) and d ‘others.
Throw in Russian billionaire Yelena Baturina, a Mexican ambassador and Kazakhs and the whole evening had an absurd Borat feel.
Hunter was the annoying chubby kid from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, who could have anything he wanted because he was daddy’s special little guy. Daddy Joebucks was going to help him get Pee Wee’s bike and millions of dollars in dodgy overseas contracts.
But, as Hunter recently revealed in court, the wagon has always been a little slippery. He’s been to rehab at least six times in 20 years.
So, Joe, if your stripper son is too coked to function, but he’s living the material life of a golden drug lord, how not to ask about where the money came from and how he is spent?
And what about the $17 million that an IRS whistleblower swore under oath went from strangers to 20 shell corporations tied to your family and their business associates?
Kennedy is a Fox News commentator, former MTV VJ and host of the “Kennedy Saves the World” podcast.
All of this makes Joe incredibly incompetent to the point of co-dependent paralysis where he was in the damn thing.
Then, tragically, in the midst of all this theft of money, good son Beau died of a brain tumor.
It rocked Biden’s world. But he has since mixed and stretched that story by stating too many times that Beau died in Iraq.
In fact, Beau’s sad death from glioblastoma occurred at Walter Reed Medical Center, and his honorable service in Iraq and brave life needed no embellishment.
Beau also really wanted his father to be president. So, apparently, Joe was sure to convey his son’s dying wish to New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd.
You know, for Beau.
Joe persevered until Hunter, always the headache, the annoying kind of distraction, left his wayward laptop in the repair shop a little too long.
I’d be holy if it didn’t provide a rich, bottomless roadmap to a prostitute-and-gun-drunk damaged man and a drifting family.
Hunter admitted in an email to his daughter Naomi that he gave “half” of his salary to “pop”.
For what? Could it be that Joe – through all of his son’s struggles – was still counting on him to be the bagman?
With a straight, confused face, Joe says things like “family is life’s greatest blessing and greatest responsibility,” but the entire Biden family, until recently, went out of their way to cruelly ignore the daughter of Hunter, Navy Joan Roberts.
She happens to be the product of Hunter’s temporary union with a former erotic hard worker, but this child isn’t an embarrassing consequence of a bad choice, like a disposable American Girl Doll.
If Joe was the good Catholic and decent empathetic he claims, he wouldn’t have so easily pushed aside an adorable grandchild, while Hunter’s lawyers worked out the details. But as long as she wasn’t making money for the Big Guy, there was no reason to pity her.
No, that liar Mr. Magoo had a plan all along, and it was always about her ambition and greed.