Kirsty Young says she holds no grudge against her estranged biological father, who abandoned her when she was just weeks old, saying there is “no score to settle”.
In a candid admission, the former Desert Island Discs host, 56, told Elizabeth Day’s podcast How to fail that one of his biggest failures was “failing to pique my biological father’s interest enough for him to stay beyond a few weeks.”
Young says she grew up “very cared for and deeply loved” by her mother, and that “my stepfather took very good care of her.”
However, she added that there came a time when she realized that her biological father, whom she met only once “briefly” as a teenager, had “rejected” her.
The broadcaster, who has two adult children with former Soho House chief executive Nick Jones, told the series: “Basically, I want to say that it’s very uncomfortable to use the word rejection, but of course that’s what it is.”
She explained: “My mother was in an extremely difficult marriage where she was treated very, very badly and ended up alone with two children because she couldn’t stand my biological father’s behavior and he didn’t seem to want to.” participate in the lives of his two young children. I’m going to leave it at that.’
Day asked the TV presenter, who returned to broadcasting after a four-year absence due to fibromyalgia, a chronic pain condition, to host the late Queen’s funeral in 2022, if she had forgiven her father.
The BBC star, originally from East Kilbride, Lanarkshire, said: ‘I don’t know him and I don’t know his story because I don’t have a relationship with him.
The BBC presenter, 56, told How to Fail with Elizabeth Day that she had met her biological father only once “briefly” when she was 16.
Young was speaking to Elizabeth Day on the latest episode of How to Fail: she told the podcaster that she had contemplated whether her career choice had been influenced by her biological father’s rejection of her.
“It is not something I harbor nor do I feel like there is a score to settle. It’s just what happened.’
Young added that his father’s absence had perhaps influenced his career choice, saying: ‘I chose something that was on camera or on the microphone. And why did I choose that?
‘Partly because that’s where my abilities lie, but also I think because I like people to like me. Do you like me? Do you like me now? Am I nice? Is this good enough? It doesn’t feel like that. That’s not what one has in one’s head. “It’s surely in the mix.”
The broadcaster, who hosts her own podcast, Young Again, for the BBC, also revealed she wishes she hadn’t been so nice when author Malcom Gladwell recently tried to change one of her questions about the series.
Young’s first question to the Canadian author and journalist, author of the bestseller Outliers, was reworked on air by Gladwell.
In the awkward exchange, he told her, “A good question is…” and began to change the question she had originally asked him about regrets.
Too pretty? Young reflected on an awkward encounter with author Malcolm Gladwell, in which he reworked the question she had asked him.
Young responded, “Are you telling me I asked a bad question?”
Speaking to Day after reflecting on the exchange, he said he wouldn’t have responded the same way, saying: ‘I actually spent quite a bit of time thinking about that and I think I was too kind. I think I was the good girl.
‘And it bothered me that I didn’t tell him on the microphone, I’ll tell you one thing, when you interview me, you can propose the questions.
But as long as I’m interviewing you, this is my job. I should have said that. I didn’t say that. I was too polite. I was too nice.
The former Desert Island Discs presenter, 55, left her Radio 4 show in 2018 while undergoing treatment for rheumatoid arthritis and syndrome.
In How to Fail, published today, he said the condition is now in balance.
She said: ‘At times it’s been very difficult and painful and unbearable and frustrating and all that stuff and I’m pretty good now.
‘I mean, it has little flare-ups and I have to be aware that those are the kinds of things that cause pain, but I do things that are important to keep me balanced.
She told Radio 4’s Today program in the summer that with fibromyalgia “your pain center is overinterpreting things that would normally happen in your body”, and also explained that symptoms also include brain fog and chronic fatigue.
He added: “At my worst I have felt like someone has drugged my cup of tea, almost like I am swaying from fatigue, and (I feel like) I just have to choose to do nothing because fatigue is almost like cement.” in your body.’
Young recalled that she spent “a lot of time” with pain, which started in her elbow joints, before she was diagnosed.
Young also told the podcast that her fibromyalgia, which was initially ruled out by doctors and ended up causing a four-year hiatus from broadcasting, is currently in balance.
“I wasn’t making it,” he added. “I had it for probably about a year or a year and a half, and it increased over time and the migraines increased, the pain increased, the fatigue increased, so it increased over time before I could manage it successfully ( for advice doctor).’
Young said that when she asked a medical professional if it was fibromyalgia, she “memorably” dismissed her concerns.
She added: “I said, ‘I’ve read about this thing called fibromyalgia, could it be fibromyalgia?'” They actually snorted… She snorted… I said, “Isn’t that a thing?”
‘She said, “That’s not a thing, that’s where we put people when they don’t have something, just to say they have something.”
“Now, of course, I realize the depth of that particular doctor’s ignorance on the subject.”
Young says that when she was “finally” diagnosed, she no longer felt like “a crazy person,” and was able to explain how she felt, and also recalled the difficulties managing her pain.
“I think I coped chaotically and poorly,” he said. Young said it was “pretty horrible to be married” and “prioritised” work and her children over the rest of her life as she couldn’t cope with anything else.