Of all the things Claire van Straubenzee could have wished for today, I am sure that chief among them was not an MBE.
Of course, she is probably deeply grateful for the honor that recognizes her services to the education of children in Uganda, but she would certainly give it away in a heartbeat to spend just one more day with Henry, the son she lost in a car accident in December 2002.
One wonders whether this sad irony does not go unnoticed by Mrs. Straubenzee or by her dear friend King Charles.
After all, he is – according to Prince Harry’s spokesperson yesterday – a father too busy to see his son, while she is a mother who will never see hers again.
With that terrible loss in mind, Charles should meet with Harry, quietly and privately, because, as the van Straubenzee family shows, you never know when you might lose a child. Or, in fact, anyone you love.
It’s not that the monarch can’t connect the dots. Both babies were named Henry and were childhood best friends. According to the Duke of Sussex’s memoir, Spare, Henry ‘Henners’ Straubenzee was the only child who asked him about his mother, Diana, Princess of Wales, after her death.
Charles should meet Harry quietly and privately, because, as the van Straubenzee family proves, you never know when you might lose a child, writes ANGELA MOLLARD. Above: The King and Queen Camilla in front of Harry and Meghan at Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral in 2022
Claire Straubenzee (pictured above with her husband Alex) is probably deeply grateful for an MBE that recognizes her services to children’s education in Uganda, but she would certainly give it away in a heartbeat to spend just one more day with Henry (right), the son. lost in a car accident in December 2002
How heartbreaking that just five years after her death, the 18-year-old died in equally horrific circumstances in a car accident near Ludgrove Prep, her and Harry’s former school.
It was in honor of her son that Mrs. Straubenzee worked so tirelessly to give other children a meaningful life, even as she denied it to her beloved middle son.
Knowing this, I am surprised that the monarch does not meet with his own son, even briefly. The safety of our children is never guaranteed and, having been diagnosed with cancer, I would have thought the King would have reason to consider the fragility of our existence. Thoughts of mortality often lead families to at least try to heal the wounds.
If there was ever a time to tentatively extend an olive branch, this is it. A meeting with Harry could have been both a kindness and a test: the former because being a father is an act of unconditional love; the latter because Harry, rightly, needs to regain the trust of his family.
How simple, what a trooper it would have been if the couple had enjoyed a cup of tea and a quick chat about their grandchildren without any of us knowing. After all, any reconciliation could only happen through small steps and Harry’s commitment not to talk about it.
Instead, are we to believe that this is all? That the relationship is irreparable? That there will be no reconciliation, or certainly not, until the Duke of Sussex has been forced to consider more deeply and over a longer period of time the consequences of his actions?
Charles is – according to Prince Harry’s spokesperson yesterday – a father who is too busy to see his son. Above: Harry greeting his father alongside Prince William at the 10th birthday memorial service for his mother, Princess Diana, in 2007.
Charles and Harry happy to be together at the premiere of ‘Our Planet’ at the Natural History Museum in 2019
It is true that Harry’s behavior and his betrayal of the royal family have been monstrous. Especially his criticism of Queen Camilla and the Prince and Princess of Wales. But we never know how much time we have to make peace. We’ve only done it now.
Instead, right now, even though Harry is only two miles from his father’s house, there is no invitation. The monarch is hosting a garden party at Buckingham Palace and his son, whether in an act of clarification or self-pity, has announced that he will not see his father.
As a spokesperson for the Duke said: “In response to the many inquiries and continued speculation about whether or not the Duke will be meeting his father while in the UK this week, unfortunately, it will not be possible due to Her Majesty’s full schedule.” . .’
So, lest this “unfortunate” situation be considered an insinuation, the spokesperson continued: “The Duke, of course, understands his father’s diary of engagements and other priorities and hopes to see him soon.”
Prince William, who today conferred the title of Member of the Order of the British Empire (MBE) on Mrs Straubenzee at Windsor Castle, has every right not to want to see his brother. His wife’s health is paramount and not even the slightest stress is something he would like to invite into his family.
But parental love is different. Demand that we forgive. It demands that we be a bigger person. It demands an examination of the reasons for Harry’s anger and a recognition that, as parents, we can harm our children in ways we don’t understand until years later. Harry has used both books and favorite media factions to get revenge on members of his family, but didn’t his parents do the same? In any case, as parents say to their children from a young age: “I love you, even if I don’t like your behavior.”
Prince Harry was seen leaving the Honorable Company of Artillery in central London yesterday after attending an Invictus event ahead of the thanksgiving service at St Paul’s Cathedral today.
King Charles with his son at the late Queen’s funeral at St George’s Chapel, Windsor, in September 2022
Prince William and Prince Harry walk side by side after viewing floral tributes for the late Queen Elizabeth II outside Windsor Castle.
Prince Harry hugs Claire van Straubenzee as Prince William watches as both children launched the Henry van Straubenzee Memorial Fund in 2008.
I’m sure the late queen would have seen Harry if she were still alive. She would not necessarily have been effusive or inquisitive and it is possible that he would have received less attention than some of his prime ministers. But just as he continued to love and support Prince Andrew, he would have kept the door open for his grandson.
Busy or not, this was an ideal opportunity for the King to see Harry. The Duke is here without his wife and is celebrating 10 years of the Invictus Games, which in anyone’s eyes is a moral and significant triumph.
Like Claire van Straubenzee, the participants in these games know that life can change at any moment. It is in her honor and in the memory of a teenager who was “all hearted,” according to Prince Harry, that the monarch should find a moment for his son.