Justin Baldoni revealed that he “experienced sexual trauma” caused by an ex-girlfriend from college.
The 40-year-old It Ends With Us director and actor reflected on the “terrible” relationship and how he struggled with “recognizing that a woman could take advantage of me” on Wednesday’s episode of Elizabeth Day’s How to Fail podcast.
Blake Lively’s co-star said that after the experience, he “struggled with that trauma for the rest of my life, because in my mind a man cannot experience sexual trauma at the hands of a woman.”
“It’s also the way society has made me feel like it’s only the other way around, when in reality it can happen too,” Justin – who was accused of ‘chauvinistic’ and ‘borderline abusive’ behavior on the set of his latest movie – said.
“I spent 15 years telling myself that this wasn’t really what was happening and that I wanted it, and all the things that women have felt and experienced for a long time,” Baldoni added.
He also said at the time that he was “hoping to save myself for marriage, and that’s as much detail as I’ll go into the story.”
Justin Baldoni, 40, revealed he ‘experienced sexual trauma’ caused by an ex-girlfriend as he ‘hoped to save myself for marriage’; in the photo in 2023
While he didn’t go into the details of what happened, he said, “There are lines that can be crossed and take advantage of someone and that can be manipulated.”
Justin said the toxic relationship started after he met a “beautiful young woman” at an Abercrombie & Fitch while he was at Long Beach State.
He said he was “trying to fill a hole and a void where I just didn’t feel like I was enough.”
‘It was a very bad relationship, and I kind of twisted myself and my personality to be what she wanted. I had strong values, opinions, and beliefs, and they could very easily be manipulated and reshaped to the point where, after a few months, I completely lost whatever self-esteem I had left. And it became very emotionally abusive.”
Justin said it was his therapist who helped him come to the conclusion that he had experienced sexual trauma.
‘One day my therapist asked me a very simple question. She said, “Justin, you do a lot of work in this space: If a woman were to tell you that story, what would you call it?” And then I broke,” he shared, adding that that was when his “healing” began.
‘That relationship ended with cheating and infidelity. It was a terrible, terrible relationship,” he said.
“I left college, moved to LA, and it was really through the end of that relationship that I ended up becoming an actor.”
Justin said the toxic relationship started when he was in college at Long Beach State and met a “beautiful young woman” at an Abercrombie & Fitch; pictured in 2005
The actor said he struggled with “recognizing that a woman could take advantage of me” on Wednesday’s episode of Elizabeth Day’s How to Fail podcast; seen in 2024
“I spent 15 years telling myself that this wasn’t really what was happening and that I wanted it to happen, and all the things that women have been feeling and experiencing for a long time,” Baldoni said
While he didn’t go into the details of what happened, he said, “There are lines that can be crossed and take advantage of someone and that can be manipulated.”
Baldoni is now married to wife Emily, whom he married in 2013. The couple share two children, Maiya, nine, and Maxwell, seven; seen with his wife in 2024
Baldoni is now married to wife Emily, whom he married in 2013. The couple share two children, Maiya, nine, and Maxwell, seven.
Fans praised the actor in August for his empathetic message to survivors of domestic violence, a theme central to his latest film, It Ends With Us.
‘You embody resilience and courage, qualities that shine brightly even on the darkest days. In the tapestry of your life, each thread tells a story of endurance, strength and hope,” he wrote.
“Every step forward you take, no matter how small, is a testament to your indomitable spirit and an inspiration to others.”
“You may not always see the impact you are having, but your journey encourages and motivates and lights the path for those of us who are still searching for the light. While I can never fully understand your pain and all you have endured, I want you to know that you are never alone in this struggle. We are with you. You are not just surviving; you are blossoming, and in your blossoming you inspire us all.”
Elsewhere on the podcast, he shared that he “almost broke down” when talking about the stress of filming It Ends with Us, which he starred in and directed.
He played the role of Ryle, who takes advantage of Lively’s character Lily during their relationship.
“Directing is a very lonely job, I’ll just be very candid,” he shared.
“Because you’re kind of at the top of this totem pole. In your moments of silence, everyone has a thousand questions for you and no one wants to interrupt you and you don’t really have many people to talk to and you can’t necessarily share your fear or nervousness about something because you’re also the leader.”
He also said that in Ryle’s mind it was “a very strange place to be.”
Fans praised the actor in August for his empathetic message to survivors of domestic violence, a theme central to his latest film, It Ends With Us.
“I’ve done a lot of somatic therapy, so there were times when I was just shaking,” he said.
“There’s a moment in the movie where Ryle finds Lily’s phone and finds a phone number and he’s very jealous and he’s heartbroken and he’s angry and he doesn’t hurt her, but you can see in his eyes how dangerous he is. After that scene I almost had a breakdown.’
“That was very difficult and honestly, that took a few months,” he said of removing the character’s mentality from his brain.
“I had a dream like him for a while and it was alive in my body, but I think he’s out of it for the most part.”
It comes after insiders claimed Justin was ‘chauvinistic’ and ‘borderline abusive’ on the set of It Ends with Us – sparking outrage over his refusal to ‘consider’ costar Blake’s character’s perspective while filming scenes depicting abuse depicted.
Rumors of a vicious feud between Justin and Blake have swirled for weeks, with online sleuths highlighting how the on-screen love interests were not depicted together in the US premiere – while some cast members have blatantly dismissed their questions about the director.
Insiders later revealed the disturbing truth about the tensions, telling DailyMail.com that Blake and Justin argued about his ‘dismissive’ attitude towards her ‘input’ while they were filming scenes involving abuse.
Elsewhere on the podcast, he shared that he “almost broke down” when talking about the stress of filming It Ends with Us, which he starred in and directed; seen in a still with Blake Lively
The source claimed that Justin only focused on “what he believed was the offensive male position” and had a very “chauvinistic” approach to the subject.
“Justin almost became the character in the sense that some women on set felt he was rude to them and that he was unprofessional and unapologetic,” they said.
‘Directing a film so serious and so important about domestic violence without allowing the women to be involved in this process is disturbing.’
It Ends with Us can be streamed on Netflix from December 9.