- Ivan Cleary has explained some of his darkest moments.
- He says he regrets not initially sharing his struggles with his wife.
- If you require support, please contact Lifeline 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue 1300 224 636
Penrith Panthers coach Ivan Cleary has gone into new detail about his mental health struggles and revealed he wished he had spoken to his wife Rebecca about what he was going through.
The four-time premiership-winning coach is on top of the world after Penrith’s historic victory against the Storm in the NRL decider, but few are aware of how much the reserved 53-year-old has struggled in his private life .
When Cleary returned to Penrith in 2019 after a difficult season with the Tigers, he noticed his mental health deteriorating.
“I had some moments when I was at the Warriors, but in the 2019 season I felt very overwhelmed, for many different reasons. Especially the fact that I was coaching Nathan,” he told SEN radio.
“I wasn’t in a great mood and I thought that was affecting Nathan too, which caused huge feelings of guilt in me.
“The Panthers management put so much faith in me to bring me back to the club and I really felt like I was letting them down. I guess sometimes responsibility can be a burden.”
Panthers coach Ivan Cleary has gone into new detail about his lowest moments.
Cleary says he didn’t even tell his wife Rebecca (pictured) how he felt, and now he regrets it.
Cleary says he regrets not initially telling his wife Rebecca how he really felt.
“I wasn’t talking about this to anyone and I didn’t even tell my wife,” he said.
‘And that was the mistake I made back then.
‘And that’s part of what I’m trying to communicate in the book. It’s very important to talk about these things.’
Cleary, who ended up taking antidepressants, wants more men to talk about their problems in a bid to save lives.
“The thing about men is that we just don’t talk about depression,” Cleary told News Corp in October.
‘If you do, you feel like a failure.
‘And you know, there’s the problem that you have to be strong enough to be able to carry the can and get through it.
Cleary (pictured with his son Nathan after the 2024 NRL final) wants more men to speak out about their problems in a bid to save lives.
‘I’m going to talk about men in this case, where they have the responsibility of being the breadwinners for their family or they just have other struggles in their lives.
‘But that doesn’t mean you’re not resilient or tough, just because you need to talk it out.
“And often just talking about it helps, you realize that other people are going through the same thing and that can sometimes give you the drive to keep going.”
If this has raised any issues for you, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636.