Is your partner about to cheat you? Tracey Cox reveals the signs

Relationship expert Tracey Cox reveals the 12 telltale signs that your partner may be about to cheat you

It's not just crazy, just a couple in love obsessed with infidelity, it's a subject that has intrigued researchers for centuries.

That's why there is a lot of information about how much people cheat and why.

Some of the factors are not surprising in the least: if your partner deceived you, for example, it is common for you to cheat (often secretly) to settle the score.

In the book "The Normal Bar", 71 percent of men and 48 percent of women said they cheated simply because they are bored.

But there are more surprising reasons why people cheat and here I have listed some of the most convincing.

However, a word of caution before moving on to see how your partner scores: these are factors, not predictions of the future.

Read objectively (and if you are really becoming paranoid, skip to the end to get some peace of mind).

Relationship expert Tracey Cox reveals the 12 telltale signs that your partner may be about to cheat you

Relationship expert Tracey Cox reveals the 12 telltale signs that your partner may be about to cheat you

They are smart and rich

The more intelligent your partner is, the more likely you are to work in a high-status job with a high salary.

This makes them more attractive and more likely to be hit by others, and the increased opportunities mean a greater risk of infidelity.

The smartest people, both men and women, are also, on average, more physically attractive than less intelligent people and, interestingly, also much higher.

The association between IQ and extramarital relationships is important for both men and women, but in reality it is stronger for women.

Smart women are much more likely to have adventures than their uneducated counterparts.

You have been treating them badly and do not feel loved

If they deceive you, the natural reaction is to assume that your partner has not fallen in love with you.

Actually, they are more likely not to feel loved by you.

The American research of 495 adults found that 70 percent of the participants cheated because they felt neglected by their partner and 43 percent were angry at them.

It's logical: treat someone well, make them feel respected and loved, and less likely to do something to hurt you.

Treat them badly and they will look out of the relationship to find what is missing and punish them.

They drink

The American investigation has also revealed something that really did not need investigation: 70 percent of those who had cheated did so because they were drunk and did not think clearly.

Tracey says that being a heavy drinker has a big impact with 70 percent of those who cheated because they were.

Tracey says that being a heavy drinker has a big impact with 70 percent of those who cheated because they were.

Tracey says that being a heavy drinker has a big impact with 70 percent of those who cheated because they were.

The more often your partner drinks without you, the more likely they are to cheat.

Add the following personality characteristic and double the risk.

They are impulsive

Some traps are planned in advance – Tinder's secret account or a dubious Ashley Madison membership – but often it's your partner in the wrong place at the wrong time (or right, depending on who is watching the scenario) and too weak to resist. .

A few drinks at the office party, flirtations that started innocently but then cross the line … the next thing you know is that something just happened & # 39;

There is always a time when someone makes a decision of & # 39; I need to go & # 39; or & # 39; Cíguelo & # 39 ;: the moment they know if they stay in the situation where they are more time, things can happen.

If your partner is useless to resist impulsive impulses and rarely thinks about the consequences of their actions, it is a big tick in the wrong box.

You just had a baby

It is a little stomach, but it is true that, after a baby is born, it is a high risk time for men to have a love affair.

Fatherhood is very stressful for both parents. Your roles change. Bodies change. Life changes.

Women, necessarily, move their focus from their partner to the new baby and some men feel excluded from their relationship and excluded from the mother-baby bond.

The baby gets all the attention it used to and her partner is too exhausted to have sex or be physically affectionate.

Many men report negative feelings after the birth of the baby, but particularly if having a child was something you wanted, not him.

Men who do not like to be tied up are likely to cheat on this occasion: they feel trapped by fatherhood and cheat to convince themselves that they still have freedom.

Men cheat during pregnancy for the same reasons.

Panic their lives are going to change and they decide to have a final adventure or their wives end the sex and instead of taking care of their own needs, find someone else.

A birthday milestone arrives

Is your partner about to turn 40, 50 or 60?

Be cautious

The researchers analyzed the activity at Ashley Madison, the dating site for people in relationships, and found that men were more likely to seek extramarital relationships when their age ended at number nine.

It is the classic crisis scenario of middle age, trying to prove that they still have it, not so old that they can not get out.

They are wired to cheat

There is increasing evidence that the genes we are born with create the basis for infidelity.

Studies of separated twins at the time of birth have shown that if one twin is unfaithful, the other has a higher rate of infidelity, and this is true for both sexes.

Women who have recently had a baby can see their man go astray as the pressures of raising a child if they feel "trapped" by fatherhood

Women who have recently had a baby can see their man go astray as the pressures of raising a child if they feel "trapped" by fatherhood

Women who have recently had a baby can see their man go astray as the pressures of raising a child if they feel "trapped" by fatherhood

A recent Australian study found that 40% of cases of infidelity in women and 62% in men had to do with genetics.

The researchers found evidence that people with fewer dopamine receptors in the brain are 50 percent more likely to cheat a spouse.

This means that their brains do not respond as well to chemicals that create an emotional bond, such as dopamine, oxytocin and vasopressin.

For most people, sex joins physically and emotionally.

If your partner's brain does not have the capacity to respond to these natural "love drugs", they will be less likely to be faithful and less likely to see sex as a betrayal.

This could explain why certain cheats do not really see what it is when they get caught because "it's just sex."

They have a close friend of the opposite sex (or of the same sex if they are homosexual)

Emotional infidelity is now more common than physical infidelity.

Research by the American Marriage and Family Therapy Association found that 45 percent of men and 35 percent of women admitted to having an emotional affair.

(On average, 20% of people admit physical infidelity).

Having friends does not mean you're cheating, but if he does not include you when he sees you, talks a lot about her and is evasive or defensive about the relationship, pay attention.

Your parents deceived

If you grow up in a home where one or both parents cheated, or if you've seen your siblings do it, you think it's just what people do.

If the experience was traumatic, it is not uncommon for a child to look at both parents, one devastated and the other that caused the pain, and decides that he prefers to be the last.

Your mentality becomes & # 39; Enter first. I do not want to be the one who slides down the wall. "

The childhood of your partner and the relationships of the parents are strong indicators of infidelity.

You earn more than you earn

A study of EE. UU In 2015, he found that people who depend economically on their partners are more likely to be unfaithful, and this is especially true for men.

Fifteen percent of men who are completely financially dependent on their wives cheat, compared to five percent of women in the same boat.

Why? Because men feel emasculated when they are not up to the role that society prescribed them as the main source of income.

They cheat to validate their masculinity.

They watch a lot of porn

Simply watching porn does not make someone unfaithful (that would make 99 percent of all men potential cheats!) But it has been linked to increased infidelity for several reasons.

First, they all cheat & # 39; with everyone in porn, and instead of getting angry, the partners come together.

Just as many young men think that trios are the norm because they happen all the time in pornography, watching pornography constantly blurs the line between real life relationships and what happens on the screen.

It makes the concept of multiple partners look extremely attractive and feeds the fantasy that everyone is in it.

They have a history of cheating

Last on the list, but from which most people are aware: there is a truth in the saying "once a cheat, always a cheat".

A study last year of 500 adults followed them through two relationships (mixed gender). The researchers asked the participants to report on their own infidelity and whether they knew or suspected that their partner had been unfaithful.

Perhaps predictably, people who reported being unfaithful in the first relationship were three times more likely to report that they were unfaithful in the second (compared to people who did not cheat).

More interesting, if it's depressing: people who reported that their first partner had cheated on them were twice as likely to report as their second partner as well.

Which brings me to my last point.

Remember that we all have control over what we do

The most important indicator of whether your partner is going to cheat is what kind of person your partner is.

Choose wisely.

A person who has a strong moral code, who believes in monogamy, wants commitment and genuinely wants to make you happy, is unlikely to cheat, even if they check all the boxes above.

Do not put your head in the sand if you suspect for a good reason, but do not assume the worst either.

See Tracey's new products at traceycox.com or lovehoney.co.uk

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