“I went to an Irish pub in Corsica and it was called the Loch Ness Irish pub.”
Traveler Colm Dalton tells MailOnline Travel about his mission to visit every Irish pub in the world and reveals one of the strangest places he has marked – after being asked if there is a minimum level of ‘Irishness’ required for a pub Irish.
Are there some that have no right to call themselves an Irish pub?
“There are definitely some who are borderline,” he says. “Loch Ness, for example, is not in Ireland.”
So what are the criteria for defining the perfect Irish pub?
Colm Dalton is on a mission to visit every Irish pub in the world. He is pictured above outside Kelly’s Irish Pub in Austin, Texas, which he describes as “authentic” and “real.”
Colm recommends Patrick Foley’s in Ghent (pictured above): “a beautiful canalside pub with a huge Celtic art mural in the beer garden.”
Colm considers the Loch Ness pub in Corsica (pictured above) to be “almost” Irish. “Loch Ness is famous because it is not in Ireland,” he says
Colm, from County Kerry, explains: ‘The first way to judge is the name. If it’s named after an Irish family, like Quinn or Keane, you know it’s going to be good because it’s probably named after the person who founded it. At the other end of the scale, if it’s called the Shamrock Pub or the Guinness Pub, it’s not going to be good.”
The specialist adds that “live music is a great sign, since a good Irish pub will have good live music.” Pub lovers will also want to watch some “aspects of Irish culture”, such as Irish sports, on TV in an authentic pub.
But the real key to knowing you’ve found a gem is the staff.
Colm says: ‘The bar staff at an Irish pub are usually amazing. They can take 20 orders at a time and make pints with their elbows. They are very friendly but they are also very good at work. You can usually tell when the staff have been trained to have a pint by an Irish owner. When the staff says, “What do you want to drink? We’ll leave it on your table.” That’s the Rolls-Royce valet parking at an Irish pub. That’s elegant. The welcome is important and that is what is expected from an Irish pub.’
Colm usually orders a Guinness in every pub “in a spirit of experimentation”. LEFT: Colm in Bologna. RIGHT: Colm at O’Caine’s Irish Pub in California
This keen traveler has so far visited 94 pubs in 45 countries, but where are the best bars?
He recommends Patrick Foley’s in Ghent, which is “a beautiful canalside pub with a huge Celtic art mural in the beer garden.” Colm also loves Kelly’s in Austin, Texas. He says: “It’s in a shopping center but it looks like an Irish cottage.” It’s authentic. It’s the real deal.’
Colm adds: “The atmosphere is important because it can be dead and that totally changes your perception. I was at one in Lisbon called O’GIllins on a Wednesday night and it was packed with a live band and everyone was singing. It was the perfect mix of Portuguese nightlife but in an Irish pub.”
In the UK, he loves London’s Auld Shillelagh in Stoke Newington, because it’s “a really nice balance of being quite hipster but quite Irish”. AND Mc and childrenwhich has a “couple of beautiful wooden pubs with classic Irish pub Thai food” in Vauxhall and Borough.
And quality Irish pubs can be found in the most surprising places.
Colm says: ‘In Jakarta, Indonesia, I was in a tuk-tuk for two hours and then it dropped me off outside a shopping centre. There was a shoe shop and a hairdresser and then a tiny door and inside was a really good Irish pub.’
Colm’s record is nine pubs in one day of holiday in Rome. LEFT: Outside The Fiddler’s Elbow pub in Rome. RIGHT: Outside Molly Malone’s in California. Colm says that is the most common name for an Irish pub
Colm pictured outside Duffy’s Irish Bar in Krakow
‘Minas Tirith’, a Lord of the Rings-themed Irish pub on a ‘Palermo back street’ also makes the list of pleasantly surprising places.
Any Irish pubs travelers should leave off their bucket list?
Perhaps surprisingly, not Corsica’s Loch Ness, which was actually a “good pub, just confusing”. However, he explains that travelers will want to stay away from Belgrade’s Gecko Irish Pub. Colm says: “It’s got a lizard on the brand and it says, ‘Have you ever been to Ireland?’ There are no lizards.” It also had a pirate theme, so they kind of confused being Irish with being a pirate. There was rigging on the walls.
But the only Irish pub Colm has ever “come out of” is the Guinness Pub in Sarajevo. He explains: “There was no one there, there was no staff and we sat in a room for 20 minutes thinking, ‘What’s going on?’ And a member of staff was outside having a cigarette. They can’t be bothered.
Colm usually orders a Guinness on his visits “in the spirit of experimentation”, but recalls a time when he had to overlook a unique variation on the black stuff. He says: ‘In Bilbao, the locals drank a drink called Frankenstein, which is half Guinness and half Heineken. And it’s a little dark on top and yellowish green on the bottom. I didn’t dare drink that.
What does Colm think makes Irish pubs so popular around the world?
He explains: ‘In many countries there are cafes and clubs, but there is no third space. And I think an Irish pub delivers on that. In some cities, the Irish pub is the alternative pub to go to if you want to feel like a frustrated poet. “Then there is definitely an imitation process where someone sees a good pub and thinks they should recreate it.”
The most used name for an Irish pub? Molly Malone, Colm says, is “particularly popular” in Southeast Asia. However, James Joyce is another top choice, perhaps due to the Irish author’s “really interesting side profile”, Colm suggests.
The Global Federation of Irish Pubs estimates there are more than 6,500 Irish pubs in the world, but Colm is “optimistic” about his goal of visiting every single one of them.
Colm takes his partner on his missions. LEFT: Pictured at The Tipperary Irish Pub in London. RIGHT: Colm at The Drunken Poet in Singapore
His record is nine pubs in one day during a holiday in Rome, where he went from “museum to pub, museum to pub.” The pub-goer often takes his partner on his mission, saying she has “become something of a connoisseur” and has “developed a taste for Guinness”.
So which pubs are next on the expert’s wish list?
Colm says: “There’s one in Namche Bazaar, in the foothills of the Himalayas, which looks really good and I think it’s the tallest Irish pub.”
‘There is another one in Kampala, Uganda, called Bubbles O’Leary and he was moved brick by brick from Ireland to Uganda.
‘And then recently, I don’t know how feasible this is, I discovered on Google that there is an Irish pub in Guantanamo Bay. “I don’t know the logistics of getting there, but it would definitely be interesting to see if it can be done.”
To follow Colm’s journey, visit his Instagram at @publicanenemy or website – publicanenemy.com.