I’m a career expert: here are 5 signs you’re a workaholic and how you can unplug when you get home

A careers expert has revealed the top five signs you’re a workaholic and how to improve by ditching the 9-5 at the office.

Dorchester leadership coach, speaker and author Andy Brown said many people are happy to say they are “married” to their jobs and wear workaholism as a badge of honor.

However, he stressed that being glued to your emails 24/7 and putting your work before everything else is not the key to a successful career.

Sacrificing free time with family and friends and neglecting your physical and mental health leads to lower resilience and can increase the likelihood of suffering from panic attacks and experiencing failed relationships.

Andy told Femail: ‘Many people would never admit to being a “workaholic” but the signs are there.

“Often it’s those around them who see it most clearly: the partner who is left alone with their kids every night or the friends who no longer text because they already know the answer will be ‘not tonight, I have to.’ work”.

Here, she reveals the five key signs you’re addicted to work, along with eight ways to combat the problem to ensure you can live your life with more balance.

5 signs that you are addicted to work

1. Punish work hours

Andy says that if you constantly work late nights and weekends, you’re a workaholic.

This may mean sacrificing your sleep or downtime with loved ones to answer emails or log into work systems.

2. Inability to disconnect

This may occur when you struggle to relax or find it difficult to stop thinking about work during your time away from the office.

This could lead to anxiety attacks, sleepless nights, and restlessness, which could ultimately lead to exhaustion.

3. A deteriorating personal life

If you’re “married to work,” it means your job will always come first, making it difficult to maintain relationships and friendships.

Before starting your role, you may have enjoyed hobbies that allowed you to socialize with others, but have now neglected them.

4. Constant stress

You may be a workaholic if you experience chronic stress, fatigue, and burnout from constant work.

According to the NHS, stress can occur physically and mentally and lead to behavioral changes.

Physical symptoms may include stomach problems, chest pain, and muscle tension. Mental symptoms include difficulty concentrating, constantly worrying, and being forgetful.

You may also be more irritable, sleep or eat too much or too little, and drink and smoke more.

5. Feeling guilty about taking breaks

Do you work through lunch and eat at your desk because you’re afraid to take a break?

Or maybe you don’t take your full annual leave allowance because you feel like you’re not “playing as a team.”

If you feel guilty or anxious about taking breaks or missing work, these are signs you might be suffering from work addiction.

8 ways to combat work addiction

1. Become aware when your emotional overdraft appears

Andy said many workaholics sacrifice their physical or mental health for job success, something he calls “emotional overdraft.”

But in the long run, this can end up with you feeling very stressed, overwhelmed, and eventually exhausted.

He said: It’s a crisis for workers everywhere. By becoming aware of your emotional overdraft and the specific behaviors that trigger it, you’ll be able to spot unhealthy habits and make small changes right away.’

2. Find out what really leads to work addiction

Andy revealed the ten things workaholics may think or behaviors they embody that can decrease their effectiveness.

These ten things can directly influence performance and the tendency to overwork:

• Trust: I only trust myself; I don’t trust others; I want to keep control
• Urgency: I’m short on time; I am acting on reflex; I’m not thinking
• Expectation: It is normal to feel stressed; it’s my habit
• Duty: it’s my job; no alternative; the money stops with me
• Just flipping, do it (JFDI): I do things; I am a doer
• Cost: we lack money or resources
• At a loss: I am out of ideas; I have no other solution
• Load balancing: I have a short-term need; I’m stepping in to fill a void.
• Empathy: I’m part of the team; I am showing care and commitment; I feel guilty if I don’t do it
• Self-esteem: makes me feel needed; my work is important to me

Andy says that once you know which behaviors appear most frequently, you will have the opportunity to change.

He said: “For example, if trust is your main driver, you will tend to accept work that should be done by others because you don’t trust them to do it.”

“Notice when you are undermining those around you and take a step back.”

The expert said many workers score high on “self-esteem” and believe that if they work harder, they will be seen as more worthy.

“This is rarely, if ever, the case. Stop valuing other people’s opinions in addition to your own and prioritize your own life choices. If you don’t, someone else will make decisions for you,” Andy said.

3. Value your own health

Everyone moving up the career ladder has different levels of resilience, and what may be a week of rest and recovery for one person may be a week of energy for another.

Andy said that without developing your resilience, your impact and effectiveness at work and at home begin to diminish.

He said workaholics need to start valuing sleep, rest and play and see them as enablers to doing their best work, rather than an inconvenience that prevents them from sending “just one more email.”

“If your cell phone battery dies, you don’t expect it to make ‘just one more call’ and consider it weak if it doesn’t work,” Andy added.

4. Reject ‘it’s supposed to be difficult’

Andy said a harmful myth about work is the belief that you always have to be fighting.

When everything can’t be done, he said there are three options:

1. Worry and punish yourself with stress

2. Identify a ‘route’ – work like a horse until you reach the end

3. Work smarter, not harder: Get help; ask for some favors; delegate; improve processes

“There are thousands of ways to do more things with less effort if we are able to break from our usual way of working,” he said.

5. Be empathetic, but not at all costs

The expert said that there is nothing wrong with being empathetic, but when empathy arises from a need to please or a longing to belong, that is when it begins to be on its own.

‘Applying empathy incorrectly prevents it from being effective. “When you do something because you feel like you have to, like working late because other people are still at their desks and you want to support them, you’re not helping them,” Andy said.

“Ironically, they may be desperate to get home, but they don’t think they can because you’re still there.”

6. Observe other people’s behavior.

Andy says it’s important to realize that other people have good and bad days just like you, and sharing this idea would create a “positive impact.”

“If everyone around you saw the size of their emotional overshoots as indicators of how well or poorly they are coping at work, resilience levels would be higher and you would almost certainly see a reduction in stress, burnout and workaholism and a collectively healthier relationship to work,’ he said.

7. Listen to those who love you

While it may be an uncomfortable conversation, if you think you are a workaholic, you should ask your loved ones for advice and learn how your work addiction might affect them.

How are you experiencing the consequences of your ‘addiction’? The difficult conversations you’ve been avoiding could be the push you need to make some real changes.

8. Determine what you would prefer to do

What do you value? What else could you do if work didn’t consume you?

Andy recommends creating a non-work-related goal and applying the positive aspects of your workaholic tendencies (tenacity, diligence, focus) to something that does you good. How could you apply your talent for the good of others or your community?

“Everyone can be successful at work without becoming a workaholic and risking the sacrifice of their physical and mental health,” Andy said.

“Simply becoming aware of your behaviors can lead to immediate and lasting positive change.”

• Andy Brown is a leading leadership coach, speaker, and author of the new book The Emotional Overdraft: 10 Simple Changes to Balance Business Success and Well-Being.