​’We went to see our daughter receive a school award and it was given to a boy named Tommi’: SUE REID hears mother’s heartbreaking story of how teachers kept her in the dark about her 14-year-old son’s transition .

Patricia and Michael were filled with pride that their 14-year-old daughter was in line to receive an essay writing award at their annual school awards ceremony.

They arrived early to get seats and a good view of the event, held at the end of the summer semester two years ago.

The couple were already aware that the large northern England secondary school was a proud supporter of trans rights charity Stonewall, with posters celebrating “LGBTQ+ diversity” plastered in the entrance hall. But nothing could have prepared them for what happened that day.

To her surprise, the girl who received the award was not her daughter Tania, who had left home that morning.

Instead, a young figure in gray trousers with curly blonde hair, slicked back with gel, appeared as the director called a ‘Tommi’ to the stand.

The middle-class couple soon realized what was happening.

“My daughter had changed her name and pronouns,” Patricia said yesterday. ‘At school, she lived like a boy and no one had told us.

‘The teachers supported his decision which changed his life. Some staff celebrated our daughter’s change of identity behind our backs.’

‘Some had offered to put her in touch with their own adult transgender friends. We discovered that she had become the school’s example of inclusion and diversity.

“At one point, teachers at school showed her photo with her new name ‘Tommi’ as a good example of a transgender student’s success story.”

Today, Patricia is still recovering from the experience. She has shared her family’s story with the Mail in light of the publication of the long-awaited Cass report into NHS care for gender-questioned children and adolescents, the findings of which are expected to reshape treatment for under-age children. 18 years.

Following this fundamental review, gender-confused children will be weaned off drugs such as puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones and a more “holistic” treatment approach will be adopted, focusing on, among other things, their mental health.

It’s good news for most parents. But Patricia is cautious. “Cass’ findings come too late for my daughter,” she says angrily. ‘Almost all of Tania’s friendship group, who she talks to online, are transgender. Most of her teachers are Stonewall supporters. The school staff have even donated several items of second-hand male school uniform to him.’

It is the school that Patricia blames most for her daughter’s desire to change gender.

Before Tania entered high school, she was a confident, high-achieving child, happy to play with both girls and boys.

“She never showed any signs of gender distress. But, unfortunately, because she was a bright girl who wanted to please her teachers, other girls bullied her mercilessly,” says Patricia.

But it wasn’t until the fall semester, after the awards ceremony, that Patricia discovered the extent of what she considers the school’s betrayal.

‘I had no information about the school. All communication (email or otherwise) used her female pronouns and legal name.

“I was confused, terrified, and tried to remember anything that could have started this metamorphosis,” she says.

‘I remembered that once at dinner time, when I was 13, he started talking about sexual orientation and pronouns.

Tania then said that she had been studying gender in school through what I now know to be the mandatory, government-approved “Sexuality and Relationships Education” curriculum.

‘The daughter we love informed us that she had chosen her pronouns but that they were secret. My blood ran cold.

When Patricia and Michael confronted the school after the awards ceremony, they were met with hostility.

‘The ‘safeguarding team’ came to see us and told us that parents had no rights. The only thing that mattered was the “child’s voice.” We were told that the results of Cass’s investigation [which had been commissioned a couple of years prior]Whatever they were, the school would ignore them completely.

Patricia adds: ‘During one meeting, a safeguarding teacher continued to refer to my daughter as a man without taking our feelings into account. It felt personal, like he was taunting me to see how far I could be pushed before I snapped.

Tania’s parents finally asked the school’s vice principal for help. They begged him to reverse his name and pronoun changes.

“She listened to me carefully, nodding at all the right moments,” Patricia says. “But she then waved us out of her office and she told me that it was very possible for a child to make a ‘safe transition.'”

This year, on her 16th birthday, without the permission of her parents, both in their 40s, Tania changed her name to Tommi through a public deed.

He is now wearing rugged military shorts and a hoodie, and men’s shoes on his feet. When she is out, she uses a male bathroom and speaks in a deep voice to emulate a teenager.

And although Tania is not (yet) taking puberty blockers or sex-change hormones, Patricia worries about her mental well-being.

‘She continues to live with us, but has rejected us as parents, as have her younger sister and other members of the wider family.

‘Teachers must realize that strong family bonds are one of the most dominant factors in a child’s future happiness and success. They put a gap between the two.

Patricia says the school has exercised enormous power over Tania’s teenage life. What happened to her is happening in many public and private schools.

“I cannot approach my daughter’s large red brick building without feeling a deep fear for her future.”

• All names must be changed.