The Cry Me a River method
Cry Me a River involves reducing and eliminating the behavior by not responding to it. For up to three nights there will be a lot of crying and will require gladiator-level patience, but after this time the crying will subside until they will finally sleep through the night.
It is essential that you follow this approach for 2 weeks so that your baby really understands the routine. Furthermore, she remembers that babies will cry because it is their way of protesting. If someone changed your daily routine, then you would protest too, at least for a while!
The Check In and Comfort method
This means checking on your baby, but making sure you don’t feed or rock them. Doing so will prevent them from falling asleep independently. Once in the crib you will leave your baby for a pre-established time and then return with some calming actions such as a comforting whisper, a pat or a gentle touch. It’s important to note that you should not lift your baby during this time (and I know it may seem impossible!). She will continue to check in and out at set times; however, the number of registrations will decrease and the amount of time between these registrations will increase, day by day. Keep in mind that some parents find that entering the room can be a turn-on, so some choose a harder style like Cry Me a River.
The 8 nights of the chair method
This method is very gradual and will require a strict approach from the parents. The difference between this method and the previous ones is that instead of leaving the room, you will sit in a chair next to the crib once your baby has been put to sleep. Next, you will wait for your little one to fall asleep and that will be your cue to go outside! Now for the hard part, every time your baby cries you will come back, sit in the chair and wait until she goes back to sleep. Every few nights, your chair will move further and further away from the crib until you are no longer in her room.
The best part of this method is that mom and/or dad stay with their baby and are together. The difficult part is that not only will you see them crying, but they will also see you looking at them, which can be heartbreaking at first. For this reason, staying consistent can be a challenge, but it is definitely doable and gets easier as time goes on.
The up, down and pat method
This one is suitable for smaller babies (under 4 months) and is more of a middle ground between those mentioned above. In this method, you let your baby feel her discomfort and cry for a short time, and before she increases you can provide support. This action could include picking up your baby, giving him a back massage, or singing him a lullaby. Once they have calmed down, you can leave when they have fallen asleep and you can go back to bed. The reason this technique is suitable for younger children is because as they get older, your presence may draw too much of their attention, making it difficult to fall asleep independently.
The Sleep Routine Fading Method
This method is another great one to use along with any of the other techniques mentioned. Basically, you continue with whatever method you choose that works for you and then start to minimize the amount of time you spend doing it. Over time, you will have decreased your actions to the point that no action is needed anymore and your baby will sleep independently! A main benefit of this technique is that it significantly reduces crying. A common struggle I hear from parents with this method is that it can be difficult to maintain. Each child will need a different amount of time to fade until she no longer needs any technique. This can be tiring and requires patience, but it is worth it. Fading allows for a more natural progression toward independent sleep and good sleep habits, while working with other methods that are right for you and your family.
The Bedtime Fading Method
The bedtime fade-out begins when you put your little one to bed around the time he or she usually starts to fall asleep. You will notice the time you put them in their crib and make this their bedtime for the next 2 or 3 nights. You will then start putting him to bed a little earlier as time goes on, and he will cry a little and make a fuss until he reaches his natural bedtime. For example, if your baby normally sleeps at 7:50 pm and you put him in his crib at 7:30 pm, he will stink for about 20 minutes until he reaches his internal bedtime. You will continue to advance her bedtime until she falls asleep only at the desired time.