Pictured: Handwritten notes found in the home of ‘killer’ neonatal nurse Lucy Letby reading ‘No one will ever understand’ and ‘Hate my life’
- Footage was shown to jurors on trial at Manchester Crown Court on Monday
A set of handwritten notes found in the home of nurse accused of murder Lucy Letby has been released.
The footage was shown to jurors at her trial at Manchester Crown Court on Monday.
Letby, 33, denies the murder of seven babies and the attempted murder of ten others in the neonatal ward of Countess of Chester Hospital between June 2015 and June 2016.
Police first detained Letby during an arrest in July 2018 at her three-bedroom home on Westbourne Road, Chester, the court has heard.
Among the items recovered were the notes consisting of carefully written words, sentences and scribbles.
Lucy Letby was arrested in 2018 on suspicion of the murder of eight babies and the attempted murder of a further six following an investigation by the neonatal unit at Countess of Chester Hospital
Undated handout photo released by Cheshire Constabulary/CPS of a handwritten note shown in court Monday in the Lucy Letby trial
Two phrases used repeatedly in the notes were “Please help me” and “I can’t do it anymore”
Some seemed incoherent, but two phrases used repeatedly were “Please help me” and “I can’t do it anymore,” the court heard.
One sentence read, “No one will ever understand or appreciate what it’s like,” while another said, “I want someone to help me, but they can’t, so what’s the point of asking.” Hate my life.’
Names of some of her colleagues also appeared in the notes – partly redacted – including a declaration of love to a doctor who cannot be identified for legal reasons. Next to his name was written ‘I loved you’ and ‘my best friend’.
Further entries on June 23, 24 and 25 included initial letters which the Crown said related to three other babies, including two boys who were triplets, whom Letby allegedly assaulted on those dates following her return from a holiday in Ibiza.
Prosecutor Philip Astbury said a green post-it note was found in the diary and was shown to jurors at the start of Letby’s trial.
Part of the note read, “I don’t deserve to live. I killed them on purpose because I’m not good enough to take care of them,” “I’m a terribly bad person,” and in capital letters, “I’m bad, I did this.”
One sentence read: ‘No one will ever understand or appreciate what it is like’
Letby, 33, denies the murder of seven babies and the attempted murder of ten others
An A4 piece of paper was also found in the diary with similarly jumbled handwritten notes, the court heard.
One sentence read, “I killed them. I don’t know if I killed them. Maybe. Maybe this is me.’
The bold and circled words “kill me” were also featured.
Other words appearing on the A4 sheet included ‘foreign objects’, ‘slander’, ‘tired’, ‘crime number’, ‘diagnosis compromised’, ‘risk factors’ and repeated ‘help me’.
In his opening statement, Ben Myers KC, defensively, told the jurors that the Post-it note was the “anguished outpouring of a young woman.”
Letby was arrested again in June 2019 and November 2020 at her parents’ home in Hereford.
Letby denies all allegations.