Groom forbids guests to have ‘dyed hair, visible tattoos or piercings’ at a wedding with a white tie
A groomzilla has revealed that he and his bride-to-be are facing backlash from their friends and family for demanding a wedding with a white tie, where guests should not have unnaturally dyed hair, visible tattoos or piercings.
In the shocking Reddit message, the 29-year-old admitted that they want their guests to be formally dressed for their wedding photography because they spent a lot of money on their photographer.
Not only did they warn one of their mothers not to wear the cocktail-style dress she was looking for, but they also told a family friend not to bring flat shoes.
Bold: A 29-year-old groom has revealed that he and his bride-to-be have banned guests from having ‘unnaturally dyed hair, visible tattoos or piercings’ at their wedding with white ties
The man explained at the beginning of the post that he and his 24-year-old fiancé are getting married in September after months of planning, but they are having issues with their dress code.
“One thing we’re really looking forward to is our wedding photography,” he wrote. “We spent a lot of our own money on a photographer, who we hired after weeks of searching and shopping.
“The photographer is highly sought after in our area and we were lucky enough to book it in advance last year. So of course we take this seriously. ‘
The groom said they “ started very clearly that the dress code is fully complied with ” without any exception.
White tie is the most formal evening dress code and is usually reserved for royal, state or live ceremonies, balls or banquets. Men should wear a white bow tie, white cardigan and evening gowns, while women should wear long dresses and evening gloves.
“The invitations we sent explicitly told our guests what we expected from them (white tie, no unnaturally dyed hair, no visible tattoos or piercings) and that they were free to decline the invitation if they had a problem with this,” he explained from.
“We also emailed everyone who sent an RSVP a few weeks ago to repeat this instruction.”
Kickback: So far, they’ve told one of their moms that she can’t wear the cocktail-style dress she was looking for, and they forbid a family friend from wearing flats, many of whom said they were ‘competent’
He said everything was “fine” until one of their moms took to Facebook to post a photo of the “cocktail” dress she wanted to wear on their wedding day.
“This is of course not included in our dress code, so we immediately informed her that the dress would be unacceptable,” he said. “Another woman (a family friend) asked if she could bring flat shoes after the ceremony, and again we pointed out the instructions for ‘white tie’.
“Unfortunately, this has created a lot of unnecessary drama for both our families and even some friends.”
The man said that both groups of parents, cousins, siblings, and “ many more people ” sent them all a private message asking them to be more flexible with their dress codes – and they declined.
“This is not happening, so we just pointed out our ‘white ties only’ policy and told them they accepted the rules when they responded,” he said.
“In our opinion, while wearing knee-length dresses and suits (rather than a tuxedo) might be appropriate for” everyday life, “they will undoubtedly be out of place at a wedding that should be completely formal.”
The groom emphasized that they organize a private event and can set the rules, noting that he has always met the couple’s wishes when going to weddings in the past.
‘Since we made this clear, people around us have called it a ** holes. In our opinion, however, this is our wedding and we’ve always been clear about our preferences, ”he said.
Confused? Critics agreed that he had gone too far, with some wondering if he even knew what a white tie dress code means
“We even told our guests that if anyone has a problem with this, they are free to drop out (even though we still pay for their seats) and not be there.”
The man later returned to the post to note that he – not his fiancé – had written the entry.
“To be clear, everyone who calls ‘bridezilla’ is very sexist,” he said. “I am the man in this relationship, and although my fiancé and I fully agree on this matter, I am the one who posted this entry.”
Regardless of who wrote the post, many agreed that he and his bride-to-be were wrong for a number of reasons, many of which have nothing to do with wanting a white tie wedding.
“White tie in a non-white tie crowd is a ** hole move,” one person noted. “Striving for strict enforcement is even more the case. It’s one thing for people who attend such events regularly, and another if you require people to buy a whole new expensive outfit just for your wedding.
“No one who regularly attends such events wouldn’t actually know this. You tailor your event to your audience and not the other way around. ‘
Requiring heels is incredibly skilled on top of being sexist (and if floor-length dresses are a must, who would notice flats under the dress?) And some guests may be uncomfortable revealing health issues that prevent them from having them all night wear, “someone else has responded.
Others weren’t even sure if they knew what white tie meant or what they were really asking from their wedding guests.
“White tie is evening wear, so unless they have an evening ceremony, it’s strange that the ceremony was even called,” one person noted. If you go to a wedding with a white tie, you’re expected to wear a morning dress during the day and turn into a white tie at night. ‘