Occasionally people ask me: "How do you handle 13 godchildren? & # 39; And my answer is simple: "I'd have to ask him." And it would be a great task, since they range from 3 to 54 years and are scattered all over the world.
But I think they probably agree that, although I love them all, I have failed in my duties as a sponsor of advice, outings and gifts.
In fact, I have to confess that once, around the year 2000, I was asked to be a godmother again when I already had about ten in my name and I actually refused. "I'm an evil godfather," I said. & # 39; I can not do it again & # 39;
SNAP-HAPPY SCOTT: Scott Anderson is the son of Los Angeles-based celebrity photographer Eddie Sanderson, who has photographed me for more than 40 years
Having discussed it with other sponsors, it seems that I am not the only one who does not fulfill his responsibilities. Apparently, Queen Victoria had about 50 godchildren, many of whom she ignored, although some bore their names. None of mine were named after me – Joan, after all, is a very boring name – but I have something in common with the great lady on that front.
It's not that I do not love babies; I absolutely love them. However, that was not always the case. I remember that my little brother, Bill, arrived when he was 12 years old; & Horrible & smelly brat & # 39;, I made fun of my mother. & # 39; No way I'm going to change your diaper! & # 39;
And I did not ignore the poor child until he became a teenager and it became more interesting, and we started to get closer, a bond that is even more intense after the death of our beloved sister, Jackie, three years ago.
DELICIOUS FROM MY TELEVISION DAYS: Amy Wilson, 31, daughter of former PR Stella Wilson from my days at Dynasty. Amy is married to former rugby player Saracens Chris Wyles
It was only six months after I met my own baby, my beautiful Tara Cynara Newley, that I acquired my first godson, Adam Bricusse. It felt like a double blessing.
Adam's father is the lyricist Leslie Bricusse, the song partner of my then husband, Anthony Newley, and his mother the film actress Yvonne Romain. We were all very close and spent years going on vacation together.
When my youngest son, Sacha, arrived about a year after Adam, they became his best friends for decades.
THE TWINS OF MT THEATER PAL: Declan, left, and Justin Duggan, with my dear sister Jackie. They are the twin sons of Charles Duggan, who produced my tour of the USA. UU From the private lives of Noel Coward
Our families had many adventures together, but one particularly horrific one took place in a rented stone house in New York, when the children were small. The nanny ran out of Adam's room in the middle of the night, shouting, "It's covered in cockroaches!"
When we went to look for him on his cot, we found cockroaches crawling all over his crib and up to his nest. Never have two families packed as fast as we are to evacuate that infested house.
Eight years later, my best friend, Judy Bryer, my personal assistant when she starred in Dynasty, produced her first-born, Victoria, and I was delighted that they asked me to become a godmother for the second time. Victoria and I have maintained constant contact, since she is almost the same age as my youngest daughter, Katyana.
CATWALK STAR CARA: model and actress Cara Delevingne, 26, daughter of my lifelong friends Charles and Pandora
Two godchildren were completely manageable and a great honor, and I entered into each relationship with the best intentions. Obediently I remembered the birthdays and chose the thoughtful gifts.
But then, suddenly, I was inundated with invitations to "godmother". The births came fast and furious in the seventies: there was Milica, the daughter of interior designer Tessa Kennedy and the prolific film producer Elliot Kastner, of Where Eagles Dare Fame, among many others.
Rachel, the daughter of Rod Tyler, then news editor of News of the World, and his wife Maggie, who was our personal assistant, was also born in the seventies. Then came Scott, son of Eddie Sanderson, my favorite photographer, and Christian, son of Luisa and Roger Moore.
LAD MILLIONAIRE: Theo Massow, three years old, is the son of Ivan Massow, the multi-millionaire entrepreneur and activist. I met Ivan more than 20 years ago, and he calls me his "second mom"
For now he was struggling to keep up with the memory of all his birthdays. I did the best I could, but it was so difficult that I decided to give a festive Christmas party for children every year. This proved to be extremely successful and kept the parents and the children, including mine, happy for some years.
But as this group became teenagers, the novelty of the Christmas holidays, the sweets and the Santas & # 39; ho-ho-ho & # 39; they became obsolete and came to a natural end.
Not that that was the end of sponsor requests! When the eighties dawned, my younger friends started producing babies.
THE BABY OF MOVIE MOGUL: I met Milica Kastner on her cot in the south of France when she was three months old. Now 46, she is the daughter of the late American film producer Elliot Kastner and Tessa Kennedy, British interior designer, who is the godmother of my daughter Katy.
In quick succession, they asked me to be Chloe's godmother, daughter of Neil Dickson (who played Biggles), with whom I was working in my miniseries & # 39; Sins & # 39 ;; then Coco, daughter of Louise and Theo Fennell, the fabulous jeweler.
Then, in the nineties, Amy, daughter of my publicist Stella Wilson, and Cara, daughter of my friends Pandora and Charles Delevingne were born. Lucky Cara had a lot of godparents, I remember 16 in all, several of whom are now dead, so maybe it was foreseeable that his parents would collect so many
By this time, he had practically given up all of them. I sent a Christmas card every year, which was often returned with a "You do not know this address" sticker.
GIRL SLIMMED BY THE BEST FRIEND: Victoria Dade, photographed here with me and a young goddaughter, Cara Delevingne, is the daughter of my best friend Judy Bryer. His father is the California entrepreneur Maximilian Bryer, who gave me away when I married my husband Percy Gibson in 2002. Victoria, now 46, has two children and works in the broadcasting industry in the United States.
Then, when my grandchildren were born in the 1990s and early 2000s, there were not enough hours in the week to keep in touch with many of them. Being a sponsor is supposed to mean acting as a referee for the child and his parents from his baptism to adulthood. Nowadays, it's about remembering Christmas and birthdays and distributing iPads and iPhones as gifts.
Another definition of a good sponsor is that they will be available at all times for the child, keeping in touch regularly. I'm sorry guys, I think I dropped the ball too. As a working actress, mother of three and grandmother of three, she could only count on us in case of emergency.
On the front of the council, however, I have tried. I gave Cara Delevingne advice on the dangers of the show. When I was 15, she asked me if I should become an actress: "No," I said simply, and to paraphrase Jack Nicholson, he added: "The world does not need another actress: 95 percent of the actors are out." of work. & # 39;
THE CO-STAR GIRL: Chloe, who is over 30, is the daughter of actor Neil Dickson, who starred with me in my miniseries Sins in the Eighties.
Of course, she did not listen and has become monumentally successful in both acting and modeling careers.
Just a few weeks ago we went out to dinner and took my 19-year-old granddaughter, Honey, to Cara's 26th birthday in Los Angeles.
I try to keep in touch with all of them. I see Christian Moore and his magnificent little children often in the south of France. Christian just had his fifth baby, a beautiful girl named Lily-Lara. And Adam Bricusse, my first godson, is now her godfather!
Now that my godchildren are having their own children, does this make me a great godmother?
The beginning of the 21st century has seen some rebirth for my duties as godparents.
My friend and producer Charles Duggan, who is homosexual, informed me that he would become a father through in vitro fertilization.
Since their twin sons, Declan and Justin, were born in 2002, we have also spent several summers together.
FIRST GODCHILD AND THE SON OF 007: The artist Adam Bricusse, on the left, is the 54-year-old son of the lyricist Leslie Bricusse, who worked with my second husband, Anthony Newley. Film producer Christian Moore, 45, is the youngest son of my friend Roger Moore
DESIGNER GEM: Fashion designer Coco Fennell, 30, is the daughter of my friends Theo Fennell, the jewelry designer, and his wife, Louise.
Then, in 2015, another of my gay friends, Ivan Massow, asked my husband, Percy, and me to be godparents to their beautiful baby, Theo.
To be fair to myself, I am now in regular contact with most of my godchildren, inviting them to my parties every time they are in the city and knowing and loving their own children.
As for the applications, I think I will definitely stay at 13. Unfortunate? I do not think so.
So, from married parents to single parents and homosexual parents, the upbringing of children has changed a lot in the last 50 years.
I have been happy to have been even a small part of the life of my godchildren, if not the most active of influencers. I love you all with all my heart.