Freddie Flintoff tells how Top Gear crash left him battling anxiety, nightmares and flashbacks, and ‘crying every two minutes’ – The cricket legend speaks for the first time about how he cheated death, saying even now he’s not ‘better’ but ‘different’

Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff has revealed his horror Top Gear crash left him struggling with ‘anxiety’, ‘nightmares’ and ‘flashbacks’, as he admitted he ‘really shouldn’t be here’.

The former England cricketer, 46, has spoken for the first time about the devastating impact the car crash has had on his life, in a new television series for the BBC.

Admitting that he had cheated death in the incident, he said he would have to deal with the consequences of the accident “for the rest of my life” and that he was now “different” from what he used to be.

A video clip recorded shortly after the incident shows the horrific injuries he suffered. Lying on a bed, with visible wounds on his face, he admits that he needs to stop “crying every two minutes.”

Flintoff speaks candidly about the mental struggles he has endured in the wake of the accident in the upcoming BBC documentary series Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams On Tour, which sees him lead a group of youngsters on a cricket tour to India.

He was driving a convertible car when the vehicle overturned at Dunsfold Park airfield in Surrey in December 2022 as part of filming for Top Gear.

The accident eventually led to the BBC deciding that the car show would not return for the “foreseeable future.” Flintoff disappeared from public view for many months after the incident as he attempted to recover.

In a video filmed a few months after the accident, he confesses that he has “almost” never left the house since the accident.

She told the show: “I suffer from anxiety, I have nightmares, I have flashbacks. It’s been really hard to deal with. But I think if I don’t do something, I’ll never do anything. I have to move on.”

In the first episode of the new four-part series, which took two years to prepare as a result of the crash, there is also footage of Flintoff speaking less than two weeks after the accident.

He tells the camera: “It’s been a week and a half since my accident. I honestly shouldn’t be here with what happened.”

“It’s going to be a long road back and I’m just getting started and I’m already struggling and I need help. I really need it.”

He added: “I’m not very good at asking. I need to stop crying every two minutes. I’m really looking forward to seeing the lads and being with them. I really am.”

Flintoff told the programme: “I have to look on the bright side: I’m still here. I’ve got another chance and I’m going to try. I look at it as such – a second chance.”

When asked by one of the young cricketers accompanying him on tour if he is now 100 per cent fit, he replies: “Not really. I don’t know if I will be again, to be honest. I’m better than I was before.”

She adds: “I don’t know what it means to be completely better. I am what I am now. I am different than I was. It’s something I’ll probably have to deal with for the rest of my life. So… better? No, different.”

Flintoff reportedly settled with the BBC for £9m last year over the accident, which was paid for by the corporation’s commercial arm. The broadcaster had apologised to him in March 2023 for his injuries.

During the new series, in which he takes a group of youngsters on a cricket tour of India, he admits that while he’s away he might need to “take a break” to “go cry in my room”.

In one part of the programme, filmed seven months after the accident, it is revealed that Flintoff has undergone several operations, but the programme explains that apart from hospital appointments, he has rarely left the house.

Speaking to the show, she said: “I thought I could just put it behind me. I wanted to put it behind me and say ‘I’m fine’ but it hasn’t been that way. It’s been a lot harder than I thought. As much as I wanted to go out and do things, I just haven’t been able to do it.”

In the programme, the star tells his friend, former Lancashire teammate Kyle Hogg, how the idea of ​​taking youngsters on the cricket journey has kept him going during tough times.

He says: ‘I think about it all the time and I think about going and how great it would be.

“So I turn around and think, ‘Well?’ I barely leave the house. I have to get on a plane, I’m going to be gone for two and a half weeks.

“But some of these kids have had a tough life. You have to try to put things into perspective. And I feel guilty for not being able to do that.”

“I don’t want to sit here and feel sorry for myself and I don’t want to be pitied. But this is about being here for seven months, actually, to going to India for two and a half weeks.

‘Everywhere I go, I wear a full face mask and goggles. I can’t do that.’

During a discussion about the programme, the cricketer reflected on how the eventual trip to India with the group of youngsters turned out to be a positive experience.

He told reporters: “I guess I’ve regained the confidence that I’ve been lacking a bit of lately.”

Flintoff added: ‘I always wanted to do it again, I probably shouldn’t say it in this room, but I fell into a television trap and did television, this, that and the other thing.

“Now, looking to the future, I would obviously love to get more involved in coaching, I don’t know in which club or where. I’m quite open to all that and also to a bit of television, to continue with that.”

The first series of Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams, in which he attempted to find “untapped cricket talent in his hometown of Preston”, attracted 3.3 million viewers in the first 30 days when it aired in 2022.

Freddie Flintoff’s Field of Dreams On Tour concert will air at 9pm on BBC1 on 13 August and will also be available on iPlayer.