A former girlfriend of Paul Thijssen, who bludgeoned 21-year-old Lilie James to death at a Sydney school a year ago, said he acted “deranged” when she broke up with him years earlier.
The young woman spoke about Thijssen on 60 Minutes, where Ms. James’s heartbroken parents, Peta and Jamie, also revealed another cruel blow the family has suffered: Peta has cancer.
When Thijssen murdered his ex-girlfriend, Mrs. James, many of his friends said they were shocked because there were no warning signs that he was capable of doing that.
But one ex-girlfriend, speaking for the first time, said she had seen what was behind his well-mannered facade years earlier.
The young woman, who wishes to remain anonymous, dated Thijssen for a few months and said it was a “pretty normal” relationship.
But he was “very in need of attention” and always wanted to know where he was and to be included in his photos on social media.
As Thijssen’s obsession grew, she attempted to break up with him, but he begged her to take him back, to the point where she finally insisted “no”, and he “got very angry” and punched a nearby tree. .
“I said, ‘Why did you hit the tree?’ And he said, ’cause I can’t hit the one thing I want,'” the woman said, adding that she felt scared and immediately ran home.
A former girlfriend of Paul Thijssen, who bludgeoned Lilie James (pictured) to death at a Sydney school a year ago, said he acted “deranged” when she broke up with him years earlier.
Ms James’ heartbroken parents Peta and Jamie (pictured) revealed another cruel blow the family has suffered – Peta has cancer.
His fear worsened when Thijssen appeared in front of his family home at dawn, two mornings in a row.
“I look out the kitchen window and through the slats of our fence I see Paul’s face looking back at me,” she said.
“Then I scream and my dad runs down the stairs, grabs a cricket bat and chases it down the street.”
The woman said Thijssen seemed “upset” and like “something wasn’t right with him.”
Then, years later, as police searched for Lilie James’ killer, she immediately thought of Thijssen.
“As soon as I saw the headline, it didn’t say who the person was, but I knew it was Paul,” he said.
‘Every time someone mentions this, I think it should have been me. It shouldn’t have been Lilieā¦ it should have been me, if I was going to be anyone.’
Jamie, Mrs. James’s father, cannot bring himself to say the name of his daughter’s killer, simply referring to him as “the monster.”
When asked if a text message from Lilie asking him to go to St. Andrew’s Cathedral School, where both she and Thijssen were sports coaches, was really from her, he said: “No, it was from the monster…
“That message shows the character that the person is simply an evil monster that needs to be hurt, hurt, done as much damage as possible.”
Pictured is Paul Thijssen, who murdered Lilie James in Sydney in October 2023.
The James family revealed that Peta is battling cancer, which was diagnosed just before his daughter’s death.
“I have melanoma on both lungs and maybe one or two lymph nodes, depending on who you ask,” Peta said.
He now receives immunotherapy once a month. “(I) just take care of my health day by day and see where we end up,” he said.
Her husband and son Max give her strength to keep going.
‘I just don’t want this situation to be worse than it is. I just think if I broke down, things would be a lot worse for them.’
Lilie James (pictured) was just 21 years old when she was murdered by her ex-boyfriend.
Lilie grew up in Kogarah, in Sydney’s south, with her parents and younger brother (pictured).
Lilie had been a champion swimmer who won an under 17 tournament in 2019.
Her parents’ social media pages were covered with photos of her accomplishments, ranging from dance trophies in elementary school to the day she earned her learner’s license in 2018.
Lilie, 16, could be seen standing at the front of her family car in Kogarah, proudly holding a yellow L plate.
“Let the fun begin,” her mother captioned the photo.
Another photo showed Lilie in her school uniform, with a graduation hat and flowers in 2020, when she finished Year 12 at Danebank Anglican School for Girls.
Having gone to school after receiving the text message from Thijssen posing as Lilie, Mr James returned home early in the morning to tell his wife and son that she was dead.
“I’ll never forget it,” Peta said.
“I will never forget that moment when realizing that she will never walk through that door again will haunt me for the rest of my life.”
But a forensic psychologist told 60 Minutes that Thijssen likely suffered from narcissistic personality disorder and couldn’t cope with the rejection of his breakup with Lilie.
“He felt degraded, humiliated and with that came an avalanche of intense anger and heated emotion, which led to his rage,” she said.
Lilie’s parents and friends called for change in the scourge of domestic violence in Australia.
“We need to do more,” his father said. “To me, this just has to stop.”
One of Lilie’s friends said, “If we want to leave (a relationship), we should be able to.”
Thijssen took his own life by jumping from a cliff, hours after murdering Ms James.
Lilie’s mother said she didn’t see how she could ever forgive Thijssen.
He “may rot in hell,” his father said.
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