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Erin Holland says cricketer husband Ben Cutting is ‘so desperate to be a dad’ as they use IVF

Erin Holland says cricketer husband Ben Cutting is ‘desperate to become a father’, leaving her feeling ‘a real sense of inadequacy’ as she struggles to conceive using IVF

Erin Holland has revealed how her IVF journey has left her heartbroken for her husband, cricketer Ben Cutting, who longs to become a father.

“If it was something I didn’t want, I wouldn’t be so mad. And when I look at Ben, he’s so ready and so desperate to be a father, so I feel a real sense of inadequacy,” the 33-year-old said. Stellar Magazine on Saturday.

The TV host went on to reveal that she has mourned her failed attempts to conceive thus far.

Erin Holland (pictured) has revealed how her IVF journey has left her heartbroken for her husband, cricketer Ben Cutting, who longs to become a father

Erin Holland (pictured) has revealed how her IVF journey has left her heartbroken for her husband, cricketer Ben Cutting, who longs to become a father

“For someone who was never really motherly, I was shocked at how much it affected me and I felt a real sense of loss that it was a natural process,” she said.

“If someone looks me in the eye and asks how I’m doing, I can find it really hard to say I’m fine when I’m not.”

Erin previously shared her heartbreak as she embarked on her IVF journey in an Instagram post.

“If it was something I didn't want, I wouldn't be so mad.  And when I look at Ben, he's so ready and so desperate to be a father, so I feel a real sense of inadequacy,

“If it was something I didn’t want, I wouldn’t be so mad. And when I look at Ben, he’s so ready and so desperate to be a father, so I feel a real sense of inadequacy,” the 33-year-old told Stellar Magazine on Saturday. In the picture with Ben

She cried during a selfie, which she shared along with a lengthy caption explaining that she felt like a “failure” and feared she was disappointing Ben, 35.

“Last year we found out that IVF is the only real option for me to have a baby,” she began.

“As someone who went in to freeze embryos until the time was ‘right’, I’ve struggled with the confusing feelings of losing any ‘normality’ to this process, feeling like the universe was telling me I didn’t mean to to be a mom blame for disappointing Ben but even am I ready, I feel physically broken,” she wrote.

Erin previously shared her heartbreak as she embarked on her IVF journey in an Instagram post

Erin previously shared her heartbreak as she embarked on her IVF journey in an Instagram post

“Yesterday we found out that our first round of IVF hadn't turned up anything viable, and the sense of failure is overwhelming.  The toll on mind and body, the injections, the cost,

“Yesterday we found out that our first round of IVF hadn’t turned up anything viable, and the sense of failure is overwhelming. The toll on mind and body, the injections, the cost,” she said

“Yesterday we found out that our first round of IVF hadn’t turned up anything viable, and the sense of failure is overwhelming. The toll on mind and body, the injections, the cost,” she continued.

“But I’m so thankful for modern medicine — it’s going to take a village to make this baby, let alone raise him.” The fact that IVF is even a possibility amazes me.

“I know this is just the very beginning of this journey, and I was thinking about sharing it when it’s over, if ever.”

wed;  Erin and Ben were married in Byron Bay on February 13, after having the wedding rescheduled twice due to the coronavirus pandemic

wed; Erin and Ben married in Byron Bay on February 13, after having the wedding rescheduled twice due to the coronavirus pandemic

They finally enjoyed a honeymoon together this month, more than a year after their marriage.  Pictured on honeymoon in the Maldives

They finally enjoyed a honeymoon together this month, more than a year after their marriage. Pictured on honeymoon in the Maldives

Erin ended by explaining that she shared her journey in hopes of reaching others who were going through the same thing.

The couple married in Byron Bay on February 13, after the wedding was rescheduled twice due to the coronavirus pandemic.

They went on a belated honeymoon this month, more than a year after their wedding, enjoying a trip to the Maldives.

Read more: In this week's issue of Stellar Magazine

Read more: In this week’s issue of Stellar Magazine

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