It’s perhaps the most common complaint doctors hear from women going through “the change”: Sex, once one of life’s great pleasures, has become too painful to enjoy.
But sexual activity during perimenopause (the menopause transition period) and after periods stop completely doesn’t have to be an uncomfortable experience, says celebrity doctor Ginni Mansberg.
In fact, the three main problems that cause women to give up sex as they age can be solved in a matter of weeks.
Dr. Mansberg, a perimenopause expert and star of the television show Embarrassing Bodies Down Under, has helped thousands of women overcome the sometimes unbearable symptoms that accompany this stage of life.
He explained that pain during sex and low libido are the two most common reasons why women “go out of business” later in life, much to the disappointment of their husbands, who are often not ready to throw in the towel. still.
The first problem, painful intercourse, is usually due to vaginal dryness and will affect 80 percent of women by the age of 60.
Sex without natural lubrication can be unbearable, and this only gets worse with the sexual changes that men experience later in life.
“Men last longer at that age, so even if you could lubricate them enough for a few minutes when they’re done, it’s been painful for a long time,” Dr. Mansberg said.
Dr. Mansberg, a perimenopause expert and star of the television series Embarrassing Bodies Down Under, has helped thousands of women overcome the sometimes unbearable symptoms that accompany this stage of life.
Or it’s so painful that you have to tell them to stop doing it. This leads to couples not having sex, but they don’t talk about why either.’
An estrogen-laden cream is the answer.
‘They need to do a loading dose, use it every night for two weeks. Then twice a week after that,’ he said.
The treatment starts working quickly, but it may take three months to experience maximum results.
“People come back to me after a few weeks to tell me that things are working much better,” he said.
Dr. Mansbergthe author of the best-selling book The M Word: How to Thrive Through MenopauseShe said she doesn’t want to assume that all patients want to “fix” their vaginal dryness or resume their premenopausal sex life when they come into her clinic.
However, the lack of intimacy that comes with a couple’s stagnant sex life can test even the strongest relationships..
The second problem is low libido, which can be divided into two categories: the first is women who feel that they “don’t mind” having sex, but then enjoy it when they do.
When Dr. Mansberg talks to these patients about their sex lives, they often admit that they know they should have more sex, and some are quite surprised once the act is done at how much they enjoyed it.
‘People come to me thinking they are broken because of (their low libido). “It’s more like going for a run: you don’t want to do it, but you get benefits when you do it,” he said.
He said that as long as you can reach orgasm, and this includes masturbation, this is probably the type of libido problem you have.
The second type of low libido is a medical problem.
“If you can’t orgasm, if you have sex and then think, ‘Well, that’s 20 minutes of my life that I’ll never get back,’ then this is the kind of problem you have,” she said.
The good news is that this type of low libido can be treated.
‘Many of these women want to be able to desire sex, to connect with their partner. But when they do, they can’t reach orgasm. It’s the worst thing that’s ever happened: a nightmare.
These women have no desire to masturbate and have no sexual fantasies either.
When Dr. Mansberg talks to these patients about their sex lives, they often admit that they know they should have more sex, and some are quite surprised once the act is done at how much they enjoyed it.
The treatment is a testosterone-based medication, but it is technically only available to women who have gone through perimenopause and have officially ended their periods.
“Menopause is a single date, one year after the last menstruation, but perimenopause can last more than a decade.”
That’s why Dr. Mansberg, like many other doctors, prescribes testosterone “off-label” to women, but only to those who meet the criteria for a libido disorder.
“It’s expensive, about $90 a month, and you have to try it for about six months,” he said.
‘It works for most people. But it’s a lot of money if it doesn’t.
Dr. Mansberg said she “probably sits in the middle” when it comes to prescribing testosterone to female patients.
Some doctors claim that it can significantly relieve a number of perimenopause symptoms, so Dr. Mansberg encourages her patients to let her know if they notice improvements in other aspects of their life.
For now, however, it only prescribes testosterone for low libido disorder in postmenopausal women with reduced sexual desire.
Confidence can also have an impact on the desire to have sex during life change, Dr. Mansberg continued to explain.
Problems like incontinence, body shape change, and prolapse top the list of reasons why women don’t want their partner to even see them naked.
All of these can also be treated, he said.
“You just have to go see your GP and explain what’s happening,” he said.
Some women experience their first symptoms of perimenopause in their late thirties, although most will experience the onset between the ages of 40 and 44.
Menopause can occur any time from your forties to your sixties, and many women have their last period in their early fifties.