Dating expert reveals EXACTLY what you need to do to find love online
Dating expert reveals EXACTLY what you need to do to find love online – and why you should never have a perfect profile picture
- A dating expert has revealed why a perfect profile is not a good idea
- Ronnie Giandzi also explained that it’s important to remember basic etiquette
- She says honesty, hygiene and being on time are all very important
Speaking to FEMAIL love guru Ronnie Giandzi explained that having a top-notch profile can help lure suitors, it’s not enough to close the deal if the basics of dating are neglected
A dating expert has revealed how having a perfect profile picture can reduce your chances of finding love online and what you need to do to make sure your new romance is going “all the way.”
Speaking to FEMAIL love guru Ronnie Giandzi explained that having a top-notch profile can help lure suitors, it’s not enough to close the deal if the basics of dating are neglected.
This includes maintaining personal hygiene, getting to a date on time, and not talking about ex-lovers.
“Some mistakes are so obvious that it’s amazing that people make them over and over again,” she said.
The profile picture is large – with many photos choosing images where they look their best, only to disappoint dates with their “everyday” look.
The problem is that online dating has become the new normal, but it’s still being perfected, she explained.
And people are starting to realize a carousel of perfectly posed selfies and witty one-liners make it nearly impossible to find someone who is truly compatible.
“Finding a partner is about a complexity of things, like how they make you feel, their smell, the sound of their voice,” she said.
She warns against prioritizing a ‘perfect’ profile picture – because people are more likely to be disappointed by the real you if it’s too flattering
‘Fragrance contains pheromones. If they can blast their way through a blast of perfume, deodorant, or beer breath, they cause high levels of oxytocin and dopamine. We ARE programmed to be attracted to the right pheromones for us.
Voice is also very strong in attraction. It’s organic. Voice contains many clues about who you are and we are programmed to understand them subconsciously.
Just hearing someone’s voice can make your heart beat faster. Texts, not so much,” she said.
So it’s no surprise that most apps have added audio features.
Ms. Giandzi has gone one step further and has developed her own app Concha, which focuses on the idea of vocal appeal.
This can help figure out if there’s a biological attraction to an encounter — which is difficult based on photos alone.
Then it is important not to make any of the most important mistakes.
‘Poor personal hygiene, that’s what it’s all about. It’s a biological turn-off. People are turned off by bad body odors and no one wants to kiss a mouth full of plaque,” she said.
‘Then there are more subtle mistakes, such as being late. At the very least, it says that you don’t really care about that person. In the worst case it says you don’t respect them.’
And while dating apps are the new normal, the method in which they are used has yet to be perfected
Ronnie’s top five ‘must-haves’ in a new relationship:
1. Honesty. “The little things you’ve learned about a person online have got you excited. Your expectation to meet them is great. you meet. It becomes clear that they are not the person they described. Your excitement leads to crushing disappointment. The attraction cannot recover from that.’ White lies may seem insignificant, but they destroy trust and lost trust is hard to regain. Being open and honest also takes courage. Few people are attracted to cowards. How will they cope when life gets tough?’ she explained.
2. Make them laugh. “Laughter brings good memories,” Ronnie said. “A smile also releases hormones that strengthen bonding. It tells the other person that you are friendly and almost everyone wants to be around someone who makes them feel happy.”
3. Be vulnerable. ‘We connect by sharing stories about ourselves. The more personal those stories are, the stronger the bond; it’s a matter of intimacy, a matter of trust, and it’s very unconscious. It’s also mutual. Let the other be vulnerable (don’t judge, listen and support) and their bond with you will grow. It doesn’t have to be heavy. How many times have you heard someone say, “I love that she can never find anything, or I love that he can’t dance?”
4. Give them a gift for no particular reason. “This doesn’t have to be a formal gift and it’s not the price that counts,” Ronnie noted. “Do they like Tim Tams? Show them you noticed, buy them a pack. Maybe they are looking for a good personal trainer. Do the research and give them some suggestions. Also never, never! expect them to pay for the first date. Offer to go for half. If they decline, offer to pick up the tab next time. Remember to do it.’ Generosity is attractive. It’s not greed.
5. Don’t think that a profile picture or an algorithm is the best way to date online. Don’t give up online dating because it hasn’t worked for you. Try to match with your voice. Voices can tell you about someone’s inner strength, kindness and honesty. There are no ambiguities in a voice message either. Texts can be misread. Find out if someone’s voice makes your heart beat faster; voices have been matching people for hundreds of years longer than profile pictures.
Source: Ronnie Giandzic
She has also been on dates with men berating their exes.
Every breakup has two sides. Blame shifting says terrible things about who you are as a person. Are you always going to blame someone else when something goes wrong?
“It also says you didn’t go any further. Who wants to start a relationship with an ex’s ghost floating around?’