A divisive dating coach has revealed his top five tips for improving a relationship — and how often couples should be having sex each week.
Jake Maddock said things like going on dates every other week, cuddling for 20 seconds twice a day, and taking up a fun hobby together are easy ways to make a relationship stronger.
He also argued that couples should be intimate every second day or three times a week and said that while disagreements are fine, they should never argue.
According to Jake, who is married, the first thing couples can do to strengthen their bond is to want to improve their relationship in the first place.
“You make the effort, you take the initiative, you make the decision (to) improve this relationship,” he said.
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Dating coach Jake Maddock (pictured) shared five top tips for improving a relationship and how often he thinks couples should have sex
Jake said things like going on dates every other week, cuddling for 20 seconds twice a day, and taking up a fun hobby together are easy ways to make a relationship stronger (stock image)
Dating coach: Five ways to improve your relationship
- Make an effort
- Have two 20-second hugs a day
- Be intimate three times a week
- Go on a date every second week
- Pick up a double hobby
Second, Jake recommended having a hug that lasts at least 20 seconds with your other half twice a day.
“Do a 20 second hug with your partner in the morning and a 20 second hug at night,” he said in a YouTube video video.
“It should be at least 20 seconds, a completely good, warm joyful hug, do it right, put some effort into it.”
The self-proclaimed relationship expert said couples should have sex every second day or three times a week.
“Not three times in one day, every second day I want you to be intimate,” he added.
“Make sure both people get to the finish line, if you know what I mean.”
Fourth, Jake said that making time every other week to go on a date keeps the spark alive.
Finally, he suggested taking up a “dual hobby” to learn together and make new friends as a couple, using the example of archery.
“You don’t care much about archery, but it becomes fun, you do it in a social environment… you meet new friends as a couple,” he explained.
“You do it together and you’re both complete amateurs, you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re both learning and that brings you closer together.”
Jake added an extra tip to advise people in a relationship never to argue.
He said that while it’s okay for couples to disagree on things like what to eat, he described arguments as disagreements that are “full of disrespect and aggression that have no place in a relationship.”
Jake said making time to go on a date every other week will keep the spark alive and suggested taking up a “dual hobby” to learn and make new friends together as a couple
“If your partner tries to argue with you, say, ‘No, I’m not arguing, we can talk about it, but I’m not arguing,'” Jake said.
“That’s what I want your response to be now and forever, not just your partner, anyone, colleagues, friends, family, whatever.”
Earlier, the dating coach claimed that not wanting to have sex with your partner is one of the top ten ‘red flags’ for a relationship.
He said poor communication, a lack of chemistry and different life goals are some of the main signs that you need to end things.
He also claimed that a “general lack of effort” and “not being able to get your needs met” are also among the reasons why you should end things.
“A lot of you miss the red flags,” Jake, who is married, explained in a video.
Explaining the first reason for breaking things up, Jake said you should end things with a partner if “he’s a really bad communicator.”
Earlier, the dating coach claimed that not wanting to have sex with your partner is one of the top ten ‘red flags’ for a relationship
“No matter how hard you try, communication just doesn’t work. That’s a big red flag. He won’t last 20 years. It’s time to go,” Jake said.
Then Jake explains that a lack of chemistry, or “puzzle pieces not fitting together” is another reason for a romance to end.
Ten reasons to get out of your relationship
1. If they can live without you
2. They don’t care about protecting your relationship
3. You don’t improve together
4. Your ambition doesn’t match
5. Your partner lacks integrity
6. They are unable to do the job
7. You have different life goals
8. Lack of effort in the relationship
9. Lack of chemistry
10. Bad communication
‘As the pieces don’t fit, they don’t fit, get out of there,’ he explained.
Third, Jake complains about a “general lack of effort” from men in relationships.
“If someone doesn’t want to make an effort to really get the relationship going and wants to put some effort into the relationship because they care about you, you can’t force them,” he explained.
‘They are not your slave. It’s time to get out of there.”
The expert also explained that different life goals can be a huge problem.
“If you want to have babies and your partner doesn’t want babies, this is a big deal.”
He added that ‘just not being able to do the job’ was another reason for leaving.
“You have to find out exactly what you need.
“Okay, suppose you need someone to be home every night. You won’t get along with a man who flies in and out and works outside the home, you only see them once a month.
‘It’s just not going to work’
Another reason to end a relationship is if your partner “lacks integrity,” while the sixth is a “lack of ambition.”
‘If you’re really ambitious, have a lot of goals, you’re a real go-getter. You can’t be with someone who’s the opposite,” he continued.
Jake also explained that those in a “healthy relationship” are constantly improving, while those in a toxic relationship are “getting worse.”
He added that another “pretty bad” red flag is someone who “doesn’t care about protecting your relationship.”
“If they’re hanging out with best friends and exes and all those people they claim they don’t have to worry about.
“They’re not protecting the relationship and that’s a pretty bad sign.
“It’s a set-up to fail.”
Finally, Jake explained that the number one reason for leaving someone is so they can “live without you.”
“I know that sounds really weird, but if someone can live without you and they don’t have to be with you, they’re not your ideal partner,” he said.
As weird as that sounds, your ideal partner should be with you. They will just have that deep longing that deep urge that I got to be with that person.
‘They’ll think ‘they’re absolutely incredible. I have to be with them’.
“As long as they don’t have to be with you. They are not the one’.