Comedian Zoe Lyons reveals her blind spot on pensions

Zoe Lyons was heralded as one of the UK’s brightest comedians 20 years ago when she won the 2004 Funny Women Award, writes Dan Moore.

Since then, he’s been making live audiences laugh across the country, as well as making memorable appearances on shows including TV’s QI, Mock The Week, Have I Got News For You and Live At The Apollo.

Zoe, 53, lives with her long-term partner Sindy in Hove, East Sussex.

Her first job after York University, where she studied psychology, was as a waitress to pay for her theater studies in London. Next year, he hits the road with his comedy tour, Werewolf.

What did your parents teach you about money?

The problem was that my dad, who was a chemical engineer, was very reluctant to talk about money. I remember asking him how much he earned and he never told me. It wasn’t so I could get more out of him, I was just genuinely trying to assess how much you need to survive. My mother, who had had several secretarial jobs over the years, always used the phrase “There’s money here if you need it,” but I never knew how much it was. Was it five pounds, 500 pounds, 5,000 pounds?

I grew up with my brother Fintan, who is now a project manager at BP. My stepfather arrived when I was ten years old. He was a bank manager, but it turned out he wasn’t the best with money.

I think he was impressed with the money, but he wasn’t the best with the money.

He worked for the Bank of Scotland and invested all his money in its shares, then the market crashed and he lost everything. What I learned from him was to hedge your bets.

Have you ever struggled to make ends meet?

When I started doing comedy in 2003 and started making money. For quite a few years it was up to date. I didn’t have a plan B. They paid me £15 for my first gig, which made me think: ‘There’s gold in those hills.’ That’s how desperate I was.

You would accept any offer to get stage time. I remember they paid me £100, which was a lot of money, but it was in Plymouth. I had to drive there, get petrol, buy a sandwich and on the way I got caught by radar so I think I made less than £5. There was a lot of that, a lot of just staying afloat.

Have you ever been paid silly money?

A few years ago I got some good money, not silly money, but good money to make infomercials for the travel company Tui, and they took my fellow comedian Mark Watson and I to Jamaica for a week. That was one of those jobs where you say, ‘This isn’t bad, is it?’ I’ve had a couple of these over the years and they come out of nowhere. In this case, my agent called me and asked me what I was doing on Friday. I said, the Comedy Store in Manchester, and she asked me if I wanted to go to Montego Bay. I said, ‘Yeah, okay.’

What was the best year of your financial life?

Probably 2022. I had some big TV jobs, including the BBC2 quiz show Lightning, which boosted the coffers. I also became quite good at corporate work, which changed the landscape significantly. It gave me the freedom to choose what I did, so I didn’t need to do the weekend clubs or the circuit. Traveling was tiring me out and I was constantly exhausted, so I am forever grateful.

I think there was a snobbery among comedians about it for a while, saying it’s not a real comedy, but I accepted it. I’m pretty motivated by money and I found that if I got good at these things, it wouldn’t hurt me financially.

Most expensive thing you bought for fun?

I stupidly bought an old Porsche Boxster for £12,000. In reality, it was a midlife crisis. I soon realized that this old Boxster wasn’t going to make me happy, so I sold it and bought another one for £27,000. It was fun, but I came to my senses and got rid of the second one too, although I miss them like they were long-lost family members.

What is your biggest money mistake?

I had a real blind spot when it came to pensions, which is strange because I’m quite good with money, finding Isas, mortgages etc. suitable. But for some reason, I fell into a black hole when it came to pensions and didn’t have them for years. Of course, I have one now, about three and a half years ago, so my biggest financial mistake was not seeking financial advice.

Best money decision you’ve ever made?

Secure a five-year mortgage five years ago at 1.4 percent. It still makes me laugh because the interest I paid is nominal. It means that when we come to renew in April, I’ll be able to get rid of the mortgage.

Do you have any other property?

No, just our flat in Hove. We have lived here for 12 years and moved from London about 20 years ago. I live very close to Hove station so I’m in London within an hour and the sea is at the end of the road. The South Downs are behind us about a mile away.

I guess I’m really lucky because a lot of the things I enjoy doing are free, but there’s also a lot of culture here. It’s gotten a little silly and expensive now, with a lot of people moving after the pandemic, but we’re not planning on moving. Our philosophy with the property is to have a very small footprint, so we can shoot and do good things.

What is your number one financial priority?

Making sure we don’t die in misery! My attitude towards money has changed over the years. Now it’s about having enough. Owning our flat is huge, as is having that pension and being a little more financially savvy than when I started.

The other night I did a corporate event for Women in Finance and we discussed how they never taught us about finance in school. I find it really interesting and sad because if your parents don’t talk about money, investing, futures and planning, where are you supposed to learn it?

Talking about money seems a little dirty to us in this country. My brother lived in the United States, where what they do is talk about money and the young people there are very informed about monetary issues. Therefore, my main priorities are to stay informed and be financially independent.

• Tickets for the Werewolf tour are available at zoelyons.co.uk.

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