CLAUDIA CONNELL imagines Harry’s other life as a hairdresser for his wife

When the Duke and Duchess of Sussex were named as one of the “100 Most Influential People in the World” by Time Magazine, their extraordinary cover photo was mocked on social media.

Meghan, with a full head of voluminous hair, stood front and center as Harry crouched behind her and basked in her glow.

A comment that went viral noted that Harry appeared to be Meghan’s hairdresser, looked in the mirror and told his client what he had done. Here CLAUDIA CONNELL imagines Harry’s other life – as a personal hairdresser for his glamorous wife. . .

Time magazine cover ¿ September 2021

Time magazine – September 2021

So much volume – my masterpiece!

Time magazine – September 2021

The world’s most influential couple or hot mummy getting cut and colored at Montecito Mane Attraction, the city’s hottest salon?

“So I gave it the body we were talking about without cutting the length. Look at that volume! It’s a lot, it’s really a lot. We’ve gone for a center part to frame your face – great for an era of visibility – and I’m now going to finish with a holding spray. Don’t worry, it’s ozone friendly.’

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Hey, I said don’t touch

Dublin, Croke Park, July 2018

Hey, you’re old enough to know you’ve got oil on your fingers that could transfer to the hair — these casual beach waves don’t do themselves, you know.

“I got up at 5 a.m. to heat the big rolls. But I love those choppy bangs and blonde highlights – who did that?’

Grenfell cookbook launch, September 2018

Grenfell cookbook launch, September 2018

Grenfell cookbook launch, September 2018

make it smooth

Grenfell cookbook launch, September 2018

‘High wind? That wasn’t in my weather app. Do I have time to go back to the car for hairspray? New? Okay, I’m just going to stand behind you and flatten your hair.”

New Zealand, October 2018

New Zealand, October 2018

New Zealand, October 2018

I won the gong for most promising junior stylist

New Zealand, October 2018

“Nobody told me there would be a medal ceremony for wobbling. Oh, “cast well”. My mistake. I would have gone for a French pleat had I known – much easier to get the ribbon on.

Speaking of awards, I won the most promising junior stylist in the Eton and Windsor area in 2001. Look how far I’ve come.’

Tour of Morocco, February 2019

Tour of Morocco, February 2019

Tour of Morocco, February 2019

Honestly, ponytails looks fantastic on you

Tour of Morocco, February 2019

‘Don’t touch her! Don’t touch her!

‘Relief! No harm done. Nobody rocks a high pony like you, Meg. That Moroccan oil really held it in place. I’ll pick up some more when I get here. It’s a lot cheaper than at home.’

Cape Town, September 2019

Cape Town, September 2019

Cape Town, September 2019

Baby I got my comb

Cape Town, September 2019

‘Oh my God! I’ll leave you alone for five minutes. What happened? Are you running for battle again?

I’ve told you before – just think, it’s much more hair-friendly. Right, where’s my comb? Let’s get those naughty bums back in their place.’

Roundtable on Gender Equality, Windsor, October 2019

Roundtable on Gender Equality, Windsor, October 2019

Roundtable on Gender Equality, Windsor, October 2019

Yes, the flirty locks really work

Roundtable on Gender Equality, Windsor, October 2019

“I went for a messy up-do. It says “serious world leader,” but the flirty locks hanging down the front also say, “I’m still fun, I’m approachable, and I’m just a working mom like you.”

“It also lengthens your neck. I’d go for more statement earrings to top it off – but what do I know?’

Sharing an umbrella, 2020

Sharing an umbrella, 2020

Sharing an umbrella, 2020

Under my dryer

Sharing an umbrella, 2020

Rai n, the second worst Barber Nemesis who always leads to frizz – the ultimate Barber Nemesis. We need one of those big clear Fulton umbrellas Grandma Queenie has. They come right over your head, but the admiring public can still see you and where the color band of the brolly matches your outfit.’

Cape Town, September 2019

Cape Town, September 2019

Cape Town, September 2019

That style is not my cup of tea

Cape Town, September 2019

“I know you like tall, but we’ve got to chop off those dry ends—look, they’re almost dangling in your tea. Too much weight, drags hair down – I’ve got my scissors in my pocket, two inches from the ends, what do you say? New? OKAY . . . you’re the boss.’

Cape Town, South Africa, September 2019

Cape Town, South Africa, September 2019

Cape Town, South Africa, September 2019

Let me flick it a little

Cape Town, South Africa, September 2019

‘Are you all right? Need dry shampoo? I can’t stop touching it, it’s so soft, not like my Brillo pad. Those L’Oréal guys will offer a deal—and you’re totally worth it.”

Pregnancy Announcement, February 2021

Pregnancy Announcement, February 2021

Pregnancy Announcement, February 2021

Lap up my head massage, it’s included in the price

Pregnancy Announcement, February 2021

‘Would you like a head massage today? It is included in the price. How is that pressure for you? I did a treatment because it felt a bit dry. All the products I’ve used today are available at the till, Chantelle-Marie has them all packed and ready to use – there’s no obligation, although we’re offering a 20 percent discount today.”

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