Australia is governed by a parliament that legislates as ‘strict but loving parents’ and is inhabited by people who have no idea of distance, claims a British expatriate living in Queensland.
In a series of TikTok videos entitled ‘Things They Should Tell You Before Moving to Australia’, comedy writer Jordana Milward discusses the unusual quirks she’s noticed since moving from London to Brisbane.
Because the country is so vast, the 34-year-old said people have little understanding of distance and are more than willing to cover hundreds of miles for quiet outings like coffee with a friend.
Ms. Milward said she finds it “strange” how strict Australians obey the law, having grown up in a country where authority is taken less seriously, and compared Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s government to “your strict but loving parents.”
British comedy writer Jordana Milward (depicted on Mount Tamborine, south-east Queensland) thinks that Australians have little understanding of distance because their land is so vast
No concept of distance
Ms. Milward recalls being excited after a friend invited her to the beach, but found it was more than three hours away.
Covering such a distance in the UK would require significant advance planning, she said, from turning off switches to packing food and leaving her phone number on the fridge so the family can get in touch in case. of emergency.
‘Australia is so big, [so] distance isn’t something that worries people, ”said Mrs. Milward.
“Just going to the next town could be hundreds of miles, and there aren’t any streetlights in between!”
Ms. Milward encouraged fellow expats to embrace the epic journeys and accept invitations to faraway destinations if they want to experience the Australian way of life.
“Being an Australian isn’t all about citizenship – it’s a state of mind,” she said.
So when someone asks you if you want to go to the beach, do you just answer, four hours away? Too easy.’
Ms Milward compared the Australian government to well-meaning parents who hold citizens much more account for minor offenses than the UK authorities.
Citing COVID-19 social waiver laws as an example, Ms Milward argued that Britons are simply ‘not afraid’ of punishment from the police or the Westminster parliament, because official instructions are issued on a suggestive rather than a directive.
But in Australia, she found that the vast majority follow the rules because of the government’s uncompromising stance that “actions have consequences.”
The 34-year-old (pictured at Kangaroo Point in Brisbane on May 30, 2020) debunked the myth about Australia’s poisonous creatures and assured viewers that the country is far from overrun.
“It’s weird living in a country where the government has power over us,” she said. “They’re like your strict but loving parents.”
Followers agreed, and one woman wrote, “In Australia, we have a concept of ‘doing the right thing’ and generally very compliant, provided we think they are logical and fair.”
Mrs. Milward replied, “And I like that!”
One man recalled the 2006 Commonwealth Games, held in Melbourne, when foreign visitors were “surprised that Victorians were waiting for greenery to cross the street.”
Ms. Milward (photo in Brisbane in June 2020) was surprised by how strictly Australians comply with the law
The myth about spiders
Australia may be home to some of the world’s deadliest creatures, including Mulga snakes and funnel web spiders, but the country is far from overrun with them – a fact Ms Milward said Britons and other nationalities have a hard time accepting.
Although many of her friends refuse to visit for fear of direct encounters with poisonous beasts, she said millions of Australians live their daily lives without having to ‘fight’ with spiders or other dangerous animals.
Should you check your shoes before putting them on? I don’t really think in the city, but maybe in the countryside, ”she said.
It’s more important to keep an eye on the Hemsworth brothers, Ms. Milward joked, referring to Hollywood actors Chris and Luke, who are often seen in the bohemian town of Byron Bay, New South Wales.
Unhelpful public transport
Interactive signs on British buses announce the impending stop, but in Queensland commuters are expected to know where to get off – something Ms. Milward hasn’t been able to ignore since moving.
“You get in and tell the driver where you want to go, and he just has to remember your stop,” she said.
“It’s like Australians playing a game of guessing the tourist – it’s the one who looks panicked because they don’t know where they’re going!”
Ms. Milward said drivers always say hello and tell her where to go, which has led her to believe that people Down Under are friendlier than in her native London.