A British equestrian star left a heartbreaking letter when she died by assisted suicide after suffering a devastating spinal injury in a horror fall.
Caroline March, 31, revealed why she wanted to end her life in a moving message she shared on her public Facebook page, saying: “No one can really understand what I have to go through.”
He had been knocked unconscious in a serious fall during a cross-country event at Barefoot Retreats Burnham Market in Norfolk on April 16, 2022.
As she attempted to recover, she underwent extensive physical therapy and flew to the US for experimental treatment, but remained hampered by the serious injury she had been battling for nearly two years.
Ms March, from Colchester, revealed her despair at not being able to do “anything” she once loved, having previously thrived on “hits of adrenaline” and “spontaneity”.
Professional cyclist Caroline March, 31, suffered a terrible fall in April 2022.
Caroline’s death by assisted suicide was announced Saturday
He also posted a heartbreaking letter on his Facebook explaining his decision.
She described herself as “determined and “independent,” a person who “hates asking for help,” although she said she wanted her letter to “silence the voices” of people who might question her decision.
March, whose death was announced Saturday, began his letter by saying, “Where to begin writing this?”
“The ideal would be to say nothing at all, because in the end the people I care about know, but of course everyone will have an opinion that they feel the need to express.”
He continued: ‘I have never understood society’s obsession with longevity and the need to live as long as possible.
‘Alan Watts, a well-known philosopher, said: “I would rather have a short life full of what I love to do than a long life spent in misery.”
“Assisted suicide is always something I believed in and I have always said that if something happened to me and I was forced into the situation of not being able to have the quality of life I wanted, that would be the path I would take.” .
‘I’m not going to lie, I never imagined it would come to fruition but here we are.’
Mrs March is seen with a horse after her accident during a cross-country event at Barefoot Retreats Burnham Market in Norfolk
The death of March, who loved horses, was announced on Saturday last week.
March revealed her despair at not being able to do “everything and nothing” she once loved
He added: “I could keep going, but it’s a decision I’ve made which is the best path for me.”
‘No one can really understand what I have to go through. My utmost respect to anyone who has not only made a life after an injury, but also those who have flourished. ‘
March also detailed her longing to have a family of her own, writing, “All I ever wanted was a family and I would have given up everything in an instant for one.” Two or three little saplings running around the family farm having inherited my wild ways.
“I really wanted to be a young mother and I would have been bloody good.”
She had been a professional cyclist up to four-star level, but her injury forced her to withdraw from eventing despite receiving “successful” spinal surgery for a fractured vertebra.
She wrote: ‘There are many new treatments for SCI and the advances are exciting. For everyone’s sake, I hope it stays that way so that my projected future is not the same for everyone.
‘A broken back may soon be treated in the same way as a broken arm. It’s not an existence I want. Bowel and bladder regimen, sexual function, the complete inability to do anything I love.
‘I have felt so much love from so many people over the past few years. I just wish love could fix it or even make it bearable, but it can’t.
March revealed her despair at not being able to do “everything and nothing” she once loved
Mrs March is seen before her accident at Barefoot Retreats Burnham Market in Norfolk on April 16, 2022.
March had been a professional cyclist up to four-star level, but her injury forced her to withdraw from eventing despite having “successful” spinal surgery for a fractured vertebra.
‘A characteristic that used to be my strength is now my downfall. I’m so stubborn and determined that I have to be good at everything I do and if I don’t I slam the door.
‘I’m an amazing person, something I really believe in now but it doesn’t change anything. Life is cruel, really cruel. He was amazing, a completely independent headstrong bastard, but he was so fucking good.
Her death was announced online by Eventing News, who wrote: “It is with great sadness that we share the news of the passing of Caroline March yesterday, March 23, just over a month after her 31st birthday.
‘Caroline was known and loved throughout the British sporting events community for her big personality, fiery streak and enthusiasm for the things she loved, which led her to achieve much in her three decades.
‘She was a professional event rider, racing four stars and, after a career-ending injury at Burnham Market in 2022, struggled to find new ways to pursue joy and purpose.
“But no matter how many talents a person has, they are so much more than what they do, and Caroline’s passing – a dignified end to her life that she was able to choose for herself – will be mourned by a wide range of people who were lucky. count yourself among your friends and family.
‘Here’s to you, Caroline: you stayed totally true to yourself until the end. We will always toast to that.
“All of us at Team EN send our deepest condolences to Caroline’s family and friends.”
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